Compare XKCD.

Compare XKCD.

Everything that isn't green should be 'definitely not' and several green ones are questionable
You can totally lick Sodium! Its natures poprocks!
It's 100% accurate. But just in case, could you have the map on you when you go around licking things? The resultant news article will be way funnier that way.
Sure! I'll keep that in mind for my next lickpacking tour across Europe.
Some of the purple ones have a time limit to lick them before you die that starts once you enter the room they are kept. You'll still die after licking them, but you would at least have licked it if you're quick.
Pshh. You can lick any of them once.
You really shouldn't, though.
Oganesson has a half-life of about 0.7 ms and is excruciatingly difficult to synthesize in a way that even lasts on the order of milliseconds. The beam it's created in is sent to a semiconductor detector. You'd be stretching the definition of "lick" very heavily if you could even convolute a way to make it land on the human tongue.
If you can get your tongue inside the machinery they use at Lawrence Livermore to create a split-second instance of some rare Earth actinide, you deserve to lick it.
... How exactly would you lick hydrogen? Or helium for yhsy matter...
New fetish unlocked, but still hidden behind balloon sphincter.
Just go slow and keep it wet. It might take some time to build up your tongue strength and loosen up the opening, but I believe in you. Go forth and achieve your dreams.
OR
New kink unlocked
If that moment of introspection concludes with you being happy with your path and current situation, then who am I to judge. Carry on with your ballonilingus and be happy.
Okay if you think licking lead and uranium is maybe not a good idea then I think you need to reevaluate your decision making skills.
I wouldn’t lick lead as a hobby, but a quick one wouldn’t be the end of things.
So you're saying that it's a GREAT idea?
Thank you, I came here to see if it was at least somewhat safe to lick uranium, I don’t have access to it but if I ever did I wouldve tried because that sounds like a badass story to tell at a bar/party
The periodic table is surprisingly lickable.
It’s really funny, yesterday I saw a dude walk around with a T-shirt with exactly this periodic table and thought it was hilarious and now I find this
Licking calcium is fine?
I guess if you're okay with the nasty burn...
You can lick everything, but some only one time
Can I lick it? (Yes, you can)
Can you lick a gas? I would think it would need to be at least liquid, and once some of these are in a lickable state you probably wouldn't want to go ahead and do it.
I’ve just licked some hydrogen
I have nipples, Greg. Can you lick me?
why is it fine to lick calcium? wouldn't that cause sever burns?
It would, don't do it. There's more than one questionable assignment on the table including magnesium right above it.
Magnesium's fine, I've licked it. Held some magnesium tape in my mouth once while mixing the thermite.
Wait, why shouldn't you lick magnesium? I've done that plenty of times (for giant dumbass reasons) and I'm no worse off than before I licked it...
Most of atoms can't be find as a pure form (metal/crystal or pair). You may have licked magnesium oxyde (MgO), but not magnesium as an explosive metal.
Ah, I see I've fallen for the classic ambiguity - I was assuming the vast chemistry arena we were licking things in was not a frictionless vacuum. Yes, it's hypothetically pyrophoric with water; though it would require some prodegious amounts of slobber (or some small amount of effort) to produce that effect just by licking it - and I'm not entirely sure how well human salivary glands operate under vacuum conditions....
I wouldn't advise licking calciums:
The chemistry of calcium is that of a typical heavy alkaline earth metal. For example, calcium spontaneously reacts with water more quickly than magnesium but less quickly than strontium to produce calcium hydroxide and hydrogen gas. It also reacts with the oxygen and nitrogen in air to form a mixture of calcium oxide and calcium nitride.[14] When finely divided, it spontaneously burns in air to produce the nitride. Bulk calcium is less reactive: it quickly forms a hydration coating in moist air, but below 30% relative humidity it may be stored indefinitely at room temperature.[15]
Because calcium reacts exothermically with water and acids, calcium metal coming into contact with bodily moisture results in severe corrosive irritation.[59] When swallowed, calcium metal has the same effect on the mouth, oesophagus, and stomach, and can be fatal.[46] However, long-term exposure is not known to have distinct adverse effects.[59]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calcium
Because of vigorous reaction of quicklime with water, quicklime causes severe irritation when inhaled or placed in contact with moist skin or eyes.
I posted this a long time ago. Got sent Cody's Labs list, and it was very different. He has licked so many...

Can you lick a gas? Or do you have to cool it down until liquid?
If lead is "maybe not a good idea", the rest of these must be really bad ideas. I like that there's still 2 more levels above lead. I assume the second level just explodes or vaporises you instantly or something.
How many licks to get to the center of a sodium lollipop
Gas at room temperature? Probably not a good thing to lick when it is liquid nor solid.
Good luck finding enough Astatine to lick. It's the rarest naturally-occurring element on earth. It's estimated there is less than 30 grams in earth's crust at any given time.
I'm glad someone listened to me a couple years back. The first comment I ever made on Lemmy was on the original version of this, pointing out that Magnesium was DEFINITELY fine to lick.
If it's got a nice oxide layer on the outside, fine. Otherwise it's fairly reactive.
The oxide layer forms within seconds, like aluminium and sodium (the two elements surrounding it), and even if you scraped it off and stuck it on your tongue, it isn't going to react quickly enough to do you any damage. It will probably taste slightly bitter, like licking baking soda. I have some downstairs. Shall I test it and take a video of the results?
In so far that it's such a terrible map, that it's not a nap at all, yes! Totally accurate.
how can something be 'maybe not a good idea' on a lickability scale but also be used as a medication?
Do not lick Am
Yeah maybe mixing up medicines and giving 11 year old me iodine tincture to drink wasn't the best move
Can you lick it? Well do you have a tongue, if so then, yes, you can lick it.
Should you lick it is a better question though...
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