WAKE UP
^wake^ ^up^
Grab a bush and put a little makeup
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What's New Pussycat 7 times, followed by It's Not Unusual, then more of the first.
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Nyan cat 24 hour loop
Ballroom Blitz - Sweet
Mr Blue Sky - ELO
X Gon Give It to Ya - DMX
Turn Down for What - Like Jihn
Pound the Alarm - Nicki Minaj
Everybody - Backstreet Boys
Wannabe - Spice Girls
Cha Cha Cha - Kaarija
Paloma Rumba - Simon
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Pick three three of their favorite songs and start singing terribly. I’m talking off-key, purposely wrong lyrics. As loud as you can.
Even better if you can improv the lyrics to customize it just for them.
If they wish to preserve the sanctity of their media they’ll wake up sooner rather than later.
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My grandmother would regularly play mariachi music at way too early hours of Saturday as she was cleaning because she liked it. I learned to wake up before the crack of dawn on those days so I could be out of the house in time to avoid it.
Anyways, spice it up with things like yodelling, bagpipes, any cultural music with extremely high pitched instruments or vocals, and particularly emotional songs from popular musicals. And maybe throw in a soundtrack of metal pots falling down the stairs or glass crashing in between songs, just to keep them on their toes.
I had a roommate who would play "Burning Down the House" by Talking Heads every morning at top volume.
It starts slow and quiet, then the drums kick in hard, launching you out of bed. By the end of the song we'd be pogo-dancing around the apartment.
Wake Up – Rage Against The Machine https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=gFNPzbWROFc
Ride of the Valkyries by Wagner
Elephant Talk by King Crimson
Hocus Pocus by Focus
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Might I suggest: Who Let the Dogs Out followed by Around the World and lastly The Final Countdown.
All Star - Smash Mouth (Kid's Bop version)
The Pokérap
DK Rap
Start off confusing them with a cacophony of sound, followed by high energy, into Tom Jones shouting. Should be pretty hard to sleep through all of that
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The trick is to pick something and sing it yourself. Preferably some old traditional song.
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I think you're going about this the wrong way, You won't have wake them up if they can never fall asleep listening to every song here all night. Tell them you'll only turn it of if they set their own alarm.
Right now you're training them that the obnoxious music will be their alarm.
Also, if your kid has an android I love the alarm app called AMDroid. It is super customizable, (who knew an alarm could have so many options). It can set to do things like send a notification after a few minutes "are you awake?", if you don't respond the alarm goes again. You can set various math or word challenges to stop the alarm, you can make it only turn of if you're close enough to the router, or at a certain light level, and so on.
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Stress by Justice, at extremely high volume.
Shouldn't even need anything else. The stress the song gives should be enough to cause someone to vacate the premises.
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Wake up bitch, get up
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make your own song entirely out of gen alpha memes and slang that you don't even understand and make it as wrong as possible
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The 1812 overture. If that's too long, just focus on the section with the cannons.
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Crazy frog
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The macarena (I was struggling to think of a third song, but I would hope the first two would do the job)
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The main theme from the Lion King
Wham! — Wake Me Up
TMBG — Wake Up Call
Bullfrog ft. Kid Koala — Music for More Morning People
(I used to use Hokus Pick's "I'm So Happy" but it just hits different under the current presidential administration)
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Meshuggah - bleed, Marc rebillet morning alarm , Miley Cyrus - party in the USA
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Firestarter by The Prodigy
Wipe Out by The Surfaris
Mars from Holst's Planet's Suite
Starting with Them Bones is key
When I struggled to get up in my late teens and early twenties, I used a submarine dive horn as an alarm. That worked well, but my roommates were not a fan.
Edit: This is a fun post and I kinda ignored the game, my bad!
I use Fleet Foxes' Sun Giant as an alarm, the deep inhale in the beginning gets me up instantly then the soft music is comforting as I stir awake. But might not be as useful for a teen who can't wake up.
Streetlight Manifesto's Everything Went Numb starts with horns and quickly gets upbeat and fast, great track that seems hard to sleep through.
Moxy Fruvus' King of Spain has a good mix of upbeat, percussive vocals and a slightly embarassing Weird Al/comedy acapella vibes that might make it insufferable to sleep through.
I could easily see Blue Swede's Hooked on a Feeling becoming a dreaded familiar wake up call. Ooga Chaka Ooga Ooga Ooga Chaka Ooga Ooga Ooga Chaka...
Maybe set up a subwoofer under their bed and hit em with something like Aquagen's Ihr Seid so Leise.
Honorable mention: The darkest and most evil song ever made. Satan himself couldn't conjure a more effective earworm.
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- MELT-BANANA - The Hive
- Anna Meredith - Nautilus
- Aphex Twin - Come To Daddy
If they're not enough for your child to choose an alarm instead, I don't know what is.
AC/DC — “Thunderstruck” or “For Those About to Rock”
And—please don’t hate me for this, everybody—that horrible Kars for Kids jingle. Play it on something he has to physically get out of bed to shut off.
Marc rebillet good morning wake up
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It's opinionated, but anyway here's my list lol
Toots & the Maytals - Broadway Jungle then The Toasters - I'm Running Right Through The World and finally Reel Big Fish - She Has a Girlfriend Now
Your teenager will feel like new
Wake up song improvised by Marc Rebillet Good morning sunshine by the narcissist cookbook Happy morning - The song from the folgers coffee ad
The Humpty Dance - Digital Underground
Twist - Korn
Everybody (Backstreet's Back) - The Backstreet Boys
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Bodies - Drowning Pool
It gives nice quiet and loud so that it isn't easy to tune out
Aphex Twin - Rhubarb (#3 on Selected Ambient Works Volume II)
Tycho - Awake
Ray Parker Jr - Ghostbusters
Gentle come-up, gentle rhythm introduction, followed by unresistable urge to dance
it has 1 song: paradigm shift by liquid tension experiment
Chop suey
Alternatively
Your new morning alarm by Mark Rebillet
Just start playing Pantera's Cowboys From Hell album from the beginning and I guarantee he'll get up. If you want to spice it up just start it on a different song each morning.
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When I went to band camp, they'd wake us up by setting up giant speakers in the dorm halls and playing Eye of the Tiger or Convoy
There's a YouTube channel called " The Guy Who Sings Your Name Over and Over "
See if he has a song with your kid's name.
Psychosocial-Slipknot Coming Undone-Korn The Devil in I-Slipknot
Man, I would wake up in a great mood
Good morning sunshine by the narcissist cookbook
Why three when one will do?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2yptujSQMY
(Yeah, it's only one song, but play it loud enough and hopefully you'll only need the one song.)
1: Good Morning Vietnam monologue. 2: Whatever march music you find appropriate. I'd recommend the March of the Red Cavalry. 3: Dead Kennedys: Kill The Poor.
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Start with
Nuco - Fairest of the seasons
And just as it sets in beautifully... peaceful... you immediately play
System of a down - jet pilot
And round it all out with
Crazy Frog - Axel F
Also, lobby your kid's school for later start times. Kids need that sleep.
Rosetta Stoned - Tool
Hammer Smashed Face - Cannibal Corpse
Flirtin' With Disaster - Molly Hatchet
I'm Too Sexy - Right Said Fred
The Barney the Dinosaur song, "I Love You," on repeat, has been proven to be effective psychological warfare by the US Military.
Also just because it has a beat, and will confuse them, All Paladins Are Bastards
Viande by Igorrr of course
Life is a Highway
Life is a Highway
Life is a Highway
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Cranked as loud as the stereo will go:
- Hank Williams - Your Cheatin’ Heart
- The Carpenters - (They Long to be) Close to You
- Christopher Cross - Sailing
- Anything by Conway Twitty.
If necessary, find covers by the easiest of easy listening orchestras. If you want to have one album rather than individual songs, make it a Christmas album. I would recommend Loretta Lynn’s Country Christmas.
System of a down - chop suey
There is always The Most Unwanted Song:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=-gPuH1yeZ08
Warning: Very long, contains bad music that includes an opera singer rapping about cowboys and children singing holiday commercials.
I actually own this on CD.
Fanfare for the common man- Aaron Copeland
Coffee mug -the descendants
Tubthumping - chumbawamba
Get very bright smart bulbs. Set them to standard brightness all the time and then blastthe fucker come alarm time.
*Playlist may be inappropriate for some teenagers?
When I struggled to get up in my late teens and early twenties, I used a submarine dive horn as an alarm. That worked well, but my roommates were not a fan.
You Suffer by Napalm Death. It’s 1.6 seconds long, but played at max volume, it would wake the dead.
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