“Come back with a warrant” is my go to, usually gets a chuckle.

"Occupied"

"Fuck off"

“Come in!”

Followed by an earth-shattering shart

"3D printing in progress"

"Occupied" or "workin on it"

Gaza! I mean, occupied!

“Go away! Baitin’!”

"I've been waiting for you"

"come in!"

Occupied

Simple "yo"

Ey I'm poopin' in here!

"Come in, come in! I was just thinking of you!"

"Go away! I'm 'baitin!"

Occupado, Man

OccuuuuuuPAAAADDDDOOO

Occupado homey

"What's the password?"

"If my ass you wish to see, answer this riddle to me"

"I've got the stuff, do you have the money?"

"Occupado Senior"

*does not speak spanish

I would like to share this timeless classic

<cassius_clay13> so I was with my friend bryan the other night in a bar
<cassius_clay13> well he got really drunk and said he was gonna puke
<cassius_clay13> so i helped him walk to the toilet
<cassius_clay13> all the stalls were occupied
<emoti_conartist> lol
<cassius_clay13> bryan is a rugby player... so a big guy
<cassius_clay13> so he fucking KICKS one of the stall doors open
<cassius_clay13> and there's this guy in there taking a shit
<emoti_conartist> hahahahahaha
<cassius_clay13> and bryan throws up ALL OVER HIM
<cassius_clay13> then (this is genius) bryan thinks 'oh shit... if i were taking a shit and someone came in and was sick all over me, i'd want to fuck him up... so i'd better hit him first'
<cassius_clay13> so he fucking SMACKS this guy in the face
<cassius_clay13> and runs away
<cassius_clay13> imagine being that guy... WORST NIGHT OUT EVER

“This seat is taken” Forest Gump kids on the bus accent

Or “ok, but you’re gonna have to sit on my lap.”

"I am the gatekeeper! Are you the keymaster?"

Occupied????

Occupied.

OCCUPADO

Just let loose a bloodcurdling scream

When I met my to-be brother-in-law for the first time 9 years ago (he was 19 then, for context), he was in a public restroom. My to-be mother-in-law called in and said "Hey bub, you in there?"

"Hey, mom. Yea. I'm poopin'!"

"Okay. This is KryptonianCodeMonkey."

"Hi, kryptonianCodeMonkey! I'm poopin'!"

Then I went to pee at the urinal next to his stall and he announced, "Hey, I have shoes just like those."

So, anyway... if your goal is to be memorable...

Just leave the door open and nobody will knock

Fuq orf am shiten

Yes, come in?

Sorry babe I’m flying solo today

You're FINALLY here!

farts loudly

"Come in!"

I always say "come in" - no one has ever tried to come in. 😂

“Just as prophecy foretold, you have come. Enter and meet your destiny!”

“GO AROUND”

I say “occupado!” And I’m not even Spanish

"Come back with a warrant!"

If they knock: a polite "I'll be out in a moment"

If they bust in like some kind of shitting Kool-Aid man: a cheerful "HOWDY!" with sustained eye contact.

“Not sure you’re gonna want this”

"The hole is in the right wall."

Me estoy cagando

Besetzt

Come on in

A vocalisation of the Family Fortunes incorrect answer noise is my reply of choice.

Wordless scream, works every time. Also laugh afterword.

Sing! 🎶"Another one bites the dust... And another one down, another one down, Another one bites the dust,

... I'm gonna get you, too, Another one bites the dust.. "🎶

I haven't found a reason to say anything.