This beyond showing interest. You may be unaware but you are dating. You went on a movie date. You're going on a fishing date on Sunday. That's dating, we've just forgotten what that is as like a society.

He's nuts about you.

I am a former 19 year old man. Trust me.

Sounds like you're dating already.

Fellas, this proves we're not the only dumb ones when it comes to noticing someone is into us.

Yea he's into you. Either that or he's trying to get into your pants really quickly. Up to you to figure that out, whether he just wants to fuck or if he wants an actual nice relationship.

if he is not wealthy then yeah he is into you.

Yes this is called showing interest.

Lots of people taking about red flags and shit.

Just talk to him. Be honest with what you feel and ask what he's thinking and where he sees your friendship/relationship/feeling going.

Don't listen to people online who have no idea about your specific situation.

I wonder if your friends told him it was a blind date without telling you about it.

I love it and i can't stop thinking about him

That's the point.

He likes you. Maybe wise to slow him down a bit and see how reacts on that. My 18 year old daughter had a thing with a boy who overwhelmed her with gifts and paying for everything. It made her feel a bit uncomfortable and when she told him he plaued the guilt card. She ended up dumping him.

So he basically started dating you out of the blue without telling you and it's working? Well it's admittedly super funny to read but potentially a bit weird, especially buying you so much stuff. Regardless of how you handle it, yeah they like you.

Indeed he is trying to impress you, and spending his money may be a goofy way of telling you how he feels without the need to speak.

He may not know how to word things gracefully, keep in mind that it could be stressful for him as well.

Maybe at some point telling him that you can buy your own things, and that it is not the reason why you're spending time with him, could lead to a more constructive discussion... If you're not afraid to have it, that is

As a 30M European, I'd say red flag. Committing like this on a first "date" is kind of unusual. Buying tickets, snacks, and books while - derived from context - meeting for the first time.

I'd look out and watch closely, don't let shiny things blind you, and enjoy the moments.

A lot of good advice in this thread for some very thoughtful people. OP I want you to practice setting some boundaries with this guy even if you like him and continue seeing him.

Tell him no about things sometimes. Like “no, I can buy that myself”. Make sure he respects your wishes about minor things and has even, level-headed emotionally mature reactions to your boundaries.

Without a doubt, this guy is totally into you.

Oh I miss that feeling.

I would bet money that he indeed likes you.

Yes you can be nice to people in general. But there's a special "being nice to show attraction" that I think is showing here.

Yes, he likes you.

I would be cautious, this sort of behavior is unusual, even for someone who likes you. The reason behind it is up for interpretation. In the most generous interpretation, he doesn't know how to act either and is attempting to hint that he likes you. In the most uncharitable interpretation, he is attempting to lovebomb someone who doesn't have the experience to recognize the red flag.

Either way, I would approach with caution, because you don't need to be malicious in order to be abusive. That is to say, abuse very rarely occur because someone is actively trying to manipulate you. Typically, it occurs because someone has an unrealistic expectation of how relationships work in practice, and this expectation biases their actions and judgment (funnily enough, Obsession is about this exact theme).

What this means is that inexperienced people are typically more likely to be abusive just by sheer virtue of not understanding what a relationship is like. I don't want to be overly negative - I want to be clear that it's possible that he's just also inexperienced and that he is wise enough to learn quickly.

If you want to interpret his actions charitably and if you want to give him a chance, then I would highly recommend you have a good conversation at the very beginning about your (and his) expectations of a relationship, both in the short term (ie, what do you expect the other person to do in x/y situation? Is there anything that the other person may do or may stop doing that would cause you to feel upset?) and in the long term (ie, do you have compatible life goals? Do you expect that you will have a long distance relationship at some point in the future? Would you be OK with that?). Don't be scared to talk about uncomfortable or shameful subjects - it's better to get these questions sorted now than to sort them out later, when shit has already hit the fan.

And, also be aware that because both of you are likely to be inexperienced, both of your expectations are almost certainly going to change over time, and so it will be a good idea to build a habit of checking in once in a while to see if those expectations have changed

One final but irrelevant advice: hold off on sexual intimacy. It's important to build a relationship around life habits rather than just sex. That, and people will typically be guarded when in a new relationship. It typically takes about 1 year of close contact before someone starts to lower their guard, and 2 years before someone fully shows who they are (this also happens to be why most relationships last 2 years). I guarantee, the worst thing you can ever do in a relationship is to have sexual contact with someone who turns it to be crazy. It's going to be hard to hold off, I get it. Been there, done that. But it's vitally important for the overall health of the relationship to not have sexual intimacy for at minimum 6 months, and ideally at least longer than a year

It may be a red flag with him being so forward, so fast, with a relative stranger. I'd be worried if you two are the only two going fishing on Sunday (e.g. is he trying to get you alone for the wrong reasons), and you should confirm who else will be there before you commit. If others will be there, go and have fun!

Basically, yes, he does like you (Congrats!)... And it's awesome if you like him back. BUT he has to earn your trust to be granted alone-time outside of public places. And having warm and fuzzy feelings is not the same as earning your trust. Only time, patience, communication, and if others vouch for him, should be the things that move the needle of trust for a new person coming on so hot and heavy.

Good luck!

Yes.

Obviously yes.

Feels like a love bomb to me

Yeah, like the last comment, yes he likes you. Obviously. No the niceness isn't a red flag necessarily. BUT like with anything at all, don't just let your guard down. Play it smart, flirt back. Let other people know where you are going and for how long. Watch for signs of narcissism, but don't ruin the date by being on hyper alert all the time. Be cool. It could be the start of something wonderful or something brief. Try to enjoy the journey either way

Old dude speaking, here:

• if you're inexperienced like you said you were, you probably should not let some random person pay for everything at least when you first start dating them... They may (I insist, conditional form) quickly come to expect something out of all the money they're spending with you. Maybe not but I would not take any chance, if I were in your shoes.
• As an old dude (bis) I think I should mention I'm always willing to purchase books for younger people (boys as well as girls), even kids, provided there is no possibility for my gift being misinterpreted as something I certainly do not wish it to be.

Yes. But be aware of love bombing too. Good luck and enjoy the romance :)

If he paid just for your stuff and not your friends', he's definitely trying to show that he is interested in you. His interest could be romantic and/or sexual. Have fun, but don't do anything you might regret if it's only the latter.

Paying for a date and a few books is pretty harmless, if somewhat old-fashioned in a lot of cultures. But maybe he just thinks that's what he's supposed to do. However, if he also starts buying you expensive gifts early on in the relationship, be very careful, especially if he's a bit older than you! That's the MO of so-called "lover boys" that like to lure girls into prostitution. Eventually he'll demand something in return and it's only downhill from there.

Yes, he's attracted to you. However, his behavior could be a warning sign depending on how old he is. Is he your age? If so I think he's excited and enthusiastic about getting your attention, but if he's older, I agree with other posters this sounds like he's trying to buy your affection. It's a warning sign if he's in his 20s, and a huge blaring red alert if he's over 30.

If he's one of your peers, I would be cautiously optimistic but NOT go fishing and definitely do not let him drive you again. This is women's safety 101: do not ever rely on a date for transportation, do not meet in isolated areas, and let someone know where you will be and when you should be home. If you are in a place that is car dependent, you are at the total mercy of whoever is driving, and giving them too much control over your freedom. Even with ride shares available that is a risk you should try to avoid.

Unless he has already told you where he's going fishing and it's somewhere visible and well populated, or you're going with friends as a group, then you should suggest an alternate activity that puts you around people. Other people are safety, and accountability. If his intentions are good, he should be happy to accommodate you and won't mind.

I remember when I was 19, I was not the beauty standard, so I didn't have my guard up as much as my peers. It was flattering and exciting to have someone overtly interested in me. I was frankly naive and oblivious to the fact that I could be preyed on and manipulated. I thought I was smart and confident but I had no idea what was going on around me and a lot of people I thought were "just being nice" were wolves circling. You should know that there are a lot of men who see someone young and inexperienced in dating who might be kind of insecure and see them as a juicy target for control, abuse, and manipulation. Just take precautions. Things might be totally fine, but the consequences for them being a predator can be severe.

Yes.

I usually wait until the 4th date to consider getting intimate with someone. Go to a resturaunt for your 4th date. I would personally hold off intimacy till then, but hey, if it happens then it happens, just focus on having a good time together until the moment feels right.

Holy fuck this thread. It's amazing half of you have ever dated.

Yes he likes you. Holy fuck the screeches about red flags from nerds 🤣, seems to want impress you.

How long have you known him? If you two have only just met or met very recently then it's very weird behaviour for sure. Heck it's a little weird him being this forward so soon, if you did know each other only as friends before this.

He is into you. Just keep seeing him and maybe make a move. Don't get to invested and take it slow but he seems to like you

How old is this guy? Throwing that amount of money at someone you're not even involved with yet is not normal behavior. I'd take that as a red flag. Maybe he's just inexperienced or infatuated and this is his way of showing he likes you but I would be concerned about him feeling like you owe him something for it. That "crazy" (for lack of a better word) energy can go both ways. I'd definitely have a talk with him about where his head is at and where yours is if I was you.