all 33 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] 112 points 7 months ago (6 children)

You know, that would actually be the funniest possible concept if it actually turned out to be true. We discover the whole wild kingdom is like pulling a toy story on us. All animals are sentient, Our dogs actually speak perfect english.

It's much like HHGTTG said about dolphins.

“For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars and so on—whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons.”

  • source
  • hideshow 6 child comments
  • [–] 40 points 7 months ago (4 children)

    Damn, that's the secret to escape the current society, just stop talking.

  • source
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [–] 22 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    you joke, but there's a dude in britain that silently stands in the street holding up traffic. the cops have no idea what to do with him because he doesnt speak a word no matter how many times they intervene. lol

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • [–] 3 points 7 months ago

    I'd imagine that guy walking into his flat, dropping his keys on the table, digging out a seemingly empty bowling bag from the coat closet, and unpacking his day to the boa constrictor sleeping in there. "What another bloody day, Nigel. Another day-long meeting with the bobbies. No freedom no speech I tell ya."

  • source
  • parent
  • [–] 35 points 7 months ago

    From the wiki:

    Cribb and colleagues (2014) suggest that Bontius's account referred not to apes (as this description was from Java where the apes were not known to be from) but to humans suffering some serious medical condition (most likely cretinism) and that his use of the word was misunderstood by Nicolaes Tulp, who was the first to use the term in a publication a decade later.[5]: 10–18 

  • source
  • [–] 32 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    He’s just a big ol’ guy

  • source
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • [–] 28 points 7 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 23 points 7 months ago (7 children)

    Of all the apes I've always thought orangutans would be the ones that were the smartest. Now maybe thats just because I watched Robin hood at a young age but I wouldnt put it past those bastards to just be like oh shit the humans are coming, look dumb.

  • source
  • hideshow 7 child comments
  • [–] 7 points 7 months ago*

    I saw a video one time of a wildlife photographer, shooting Orangs in the hot jungle. They seemed to understand what he was doing (they understand photography?), so while one was distracting him with poses, another would sneak up from behind and steal water bottles out of the photographer's bag.

    The poor guy was trying to shoot, while guarding the bag between his legs, and the other Orang was still trying grab bottles. It was hilarious.

  • source
  • parent
  • [–] 5 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    Which version of Robin Hood has an orangutan?

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • [–] 20 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    "I would prefer not to."

    ~Bartleby the Orangutan

  • source
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • [–] 12 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    I always thought it was because they were orange

  • source
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • [–] 18 points 7 months ago (2 children)

    Orang means human or person (not "guy", honestly), (h)utan means forest.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 9 points 7 months ago

    In Arabic he's named "forest guy"

  • source