Ya, buddy. With an Adult you are dealing with another human who sometimes can be an asshole, dick, bitch, bastard, cunt , or whatever.

A kid is all those things without every giving a fuck. If you have problems with adults, you definitely will be in hell with a kid.

Had given this thought and it actually comes from here. Due to unforseen circumstances, I've been helping raise 3 kids for the last couple of years and I'm currently listed as their guardian. I've been involved with everything from diapers to after school stuff. I'm talking 85%+ of their time and needs comes from me. We went to the county a couple of years ago, to formalise some processes, and I'm now basically recognized.

However, as this situation is coming to an end, probably in a couple of months, I found it enjoyable, despite the stresses. One thing I've learnt about kids is that they generally don't have malice in their intent, while adults scheme and plot. Sure, we have had bad days and tempers have flared, but had it not been this situation ending, I would have done this thing all the way through. Given my extremely soft-landing as a parent, I realized I want more of it. Kids change you. Its weird.

Oh, I know that. It was intended as an oversimplification. I know the complications that come with it. Adoption is a possibility as well.

What a surprisingly positive and refreshing answer. Sigh, now to read the other comments that will inevitably be "WHY WOULD YOU X? BOOO"

Example conversation

Me to my niece: I like the little bow on your hair.

My niece: Thanks uncle N. I want a pink one for my birthday. Don't forget.

Me to my ex: I like the little bow on your hair.

My ex: What are you trying to say? I'm a slut? Fuck you. Who do you think you are talking to?

No, I am not kidding. She had a complicated relationship with herself, alcohol, her employer and her landlord. The previous one cheated and got pregnant, other one enabled my terrible habits and left me after I went sober and clean. I'm not expecting the exact same response but getting insulted for complimenting someone is a pain. Maybe its my choice of people, maybe its something I do or say, but I know what is working for me, hence how we got here.

Saw a TV show where two dudes faked being gay, got married all to help the one guy adopt a kid. I know the odds would be far against me.

I'm already helping raise 3 kids and have been doing so for years. My dynamic is changing, and since I'm going solo, this is one future I want to explore and try make happen.

I also did the soccer team thing, we never won a single game this season, dang. Cleats and shinguards for growing kids pile up quick.

Yeah, I expect something like that.

Turning 45. I used to avoid the dishwasher like the plague, now, its the last thing I do before I go to sleep. I can't imagine dirty dishes around me, a far cry from me and roaches not too long ago. I would ask for you to attempt fostering. It heals people. Its the best therapy you can get.

Thanks. I hope to do this in California if my plans come to fruition. Raising these kids, yeah, I've learnt a lot about them, and myself. I'm terribly far from being perfect with them, but as you mentioned, reading to them, loving them and eating with them happens pretty often and works. Once they feel safe, are well fed and nurtured, and entertained, they are pretty cool kids.

I have been thinking about this for two years, but I was pretty scared to go beyond thinking because in my own society, there is social stigma around this. But I'm done with all that. I will be judged for being single, I will be judged for being a single father, I will be judged for being a divorced father, I will always be judged. I'm over that. I just want my life, and a family, and if this is how it happens, so be it.

Thanks. If all goes as I hope, I will be moving to California next summer which is when I intend to pursue this.

I'm already raising 3 kids.

Sort of things I was hoping to hear. No, I'm not going to exploit a 3rd world person for anything. I came up in a 3rd world country, so just no. Professionally, I am doing alright, a year or two ago, I could not afford a McDonalds burger now, I'm received 5% gross from a logistics company that I did a project for and signed up for a %age of the action in lieu of me supporting them. I do about 10 hours a month for that, works out to around 8k gross and I have two other similar placed projects coming up, so that's looking good.

Been raising kids as I mentioned in another thread, so this isn't exactly new. Not easy, yup, I agree.

The process seems expensive and the information is murky.

I'm not a comparative sort of person, but I've seen people with far greater personal handicaps than my own become parents, I don't judge. Everyone has their own story.

So single fathers should just give up their children for adoption (by whom?), because "children need their mother"? Go fuck yourself.

Who said anything about "forcing" a surrogate? Women do it all the time. IIRC many places have laws to protect exactly that situation - if the surrogate mother changes her mind, she may (although there will be financial penalties, as it'sa breach of contract).