Your dad is gerrymandering the pizza.

It'd be easier with a rectangular pizza.

"Autism didn't existed on my time"

This person dad:

Next time retire all pepperonis, cut like a normal pizza and then put the pepperoni's back.

Next time imply you're bringing friends and he'll need to cut it into 32 pieces.

I wanna see him make 32 mini-pizzas with one (1) pepperoni on each.

Your dad needs to step up his frozen pizza game. He needs to remove all the pepperoni before baking then rearrange them so he can slice the pizza without cutting any of them.

There was a guy at a nursing home who lived on the 27th floor. Had to drive through a checkpoint with a guard, check in at the front desk, and ride the elevator to deliver the same plain cheese pizza every time. The guy was probably 95 so he always gave two quarters as as a tip, thinking this was a lot for a 20-something delivery driver. Probably didn't know that the financial crisis had made it impossible to find a real job even with a university degree, and that the extra 15 minutes dealing with his building meant I was losing money, and I couldn't use the fifty cents to buy a chicken dinner like he could when he was my age.

I'm going to start cutting my pizza like this.

I could see it if he were going for even pepperoni distribution, but here I'm seeing 3 slices with 5 pepperonis, 3 slices with 3 pepperonis, and 2 slices with 4 pepperonis.

32 pepperonis, he could have split it into 8 slices with 4 pepperonis each.

your dad is correct tbh

I'll leave judgement to the Italian Supreme Court.

Im going to start doing this, just to piss other people off. Thank you for the idea father of random internet person.

Not a pizza story, but I used to deliver for jimmy johns. I took an order one time to an address that was in an area with a bunch of individual doctors offices, and this address looked like it had a small lobby just like any of those doctors offices. I walked right into this family's living room while they were having some kind of get together, they asked what the hell I was doing, and i turned bright red and held up the box of sandwiches. It ended up alright; I explained myself, then they asked me to take a picture with them and joked about delivery so good they didnt even have to get off the couch. In retrospect, I realized I basically just broke and entered in a stand your ground state and got super lucky the family was chill about it

Regarding this pizza, I get it. I really do. But I feel like I would learn how to sharpen a pizza cutter before I would decide to do this.

i do this, too, sometimes.. but i don't make rounded cuts--that's just all kinds of messed up.

Big Triangle doesn't want you to know you can cut pizza this way, wake up

Aside from the top 2 slices which are a fucking tragedy, this honestly doesn't look too bad. Most slices have 3 to 4 pieces of pepperoni, so the area is kinda close and the shapes aren't horrible to hold.

Based

Don't let him cut the pizza.

Like, if that pizza is just for him, I kinda dig it. But if that is cut up for the family (and assumably siblings) to share, he deserves to deal with the absolute pants-shitting screaming match over who gets which piece that is inevitable.

So, which slice did your father choose for himself?

Your dad has a sharp knife, and knows how to wield it.

Pizza flakes instead of slices.

Are you the same person who posted this exact pic to reddit in 2023?

https://old.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/1375ixw/my_dad_does_this_to_avoid_cutting_pepperoni/

The man is clearly insane.

Put him in a home. Or just buy him a proper, sharp pizza cutter. But if he didn't consider doing that himself rather than whatever the fuck this is... I still say he needs professional care.

!pizzacrimes@lemmy.world

YOWTF

just had to liberate it

Thank you for your service.

🧠

I thought the cheese filled pretzel crust pizzas sounded hella good until I had one. The salt killed it. The cheese, dough, and rest of the pizza are salty enough that it really does not need the extra pretzel rock salt.

You cut the pepperoni?! you monster!