My shaft is where all my generation comes from. /s

Ahhh water. Blocks alpha particles. Disables magnets. Is there anything this wondrous liquid can't do?

this is how 238Pu ceramic pellets for space probe generators look like, no fission required just alpha decay. If it was fission, it wouldn't need to glow like this entire time because you can just turn it off

Doesn’t this contaminate the water?

Fun fact: hang around a strong enough radioactive source and you get the metallic taste WITHOUT even having to touch it. You just get the taste for free!

And jet fuel melts steel beams.

Y'all, it's fucking delicious. Like Simply Orange hate-fucked Tang and the baby was adopted by a loving lesbian couple, Starburst and Skittles. Smith.

🤯

But it could be tasty pain.

Yes! This was my first thought! Forbidden Razzles!

Pu 239 which is the kind that we use the most since it’s the most fissile has a half-life of around 25k years and alpha decays so its very unlikely that it is heat from radioactivity. It may be heat from forging.

Tell him it tastes like Bill Clinton, if you know what I mean.

You might have better luck if you tell them they taste like dicksickles

They'll get dreamsickle cell anemia!!

I think it's red hot

UP AND AT THEM

as does the same amount of any other substance, including for example yoghurt.

That number is just the E in E=mc²

If we are actually talking dietary calories, the number you see on foodstuff packaging, plutonium has 0.

It would certainly feed you for the rest of your life.

Unfortunately, if one were to invest a single gram of plutonium, not only are you ill equipped to actually properly harness even a small percentage of the heat energy it will produce, it also qualifies as a heavy metal, so there is every probability that whatever you do actually ingest before the chunk of plutonium exits your rear end will end up in your bones, thereby irradiating you further than the original gram of plutonium irradiated you as it passed through your digestive tract, mostly unobstructed, provided one doesn't have a previous bowel obstruction.

All of that is to say that it probably tastes spicy metallic. Especially if you have fillings in your mouth. It's energetic enough to give a similar sensation in your teeth that a piece of aluminum foil does when it touches your fillings.

I still remember the time I dropped my phone on my sleeping face and got "m understop" instead if "I'm sleepy."