Fresh tomatoes out of your own greenhouse are amazing, that's why

Hornworms and squirrells always wreck my tomatoes:(

I'm encouraging wild flowers to grow in between my berry bushes.

That’s wild, I’m sorry you gotta deal with that.

Survival skills + demonstrated empathy/care with other living beings are positives for any person. Hopefully you find someone who appreciates that. /gen

Weird. Have they seen how much you can provide from a garden?

Also, having a garden doesn't preclude one from hunting... whatever that means in the modern era. You can only eat so much meat.

Sure, but the OP doesn't say "gender warriors", it says "Western man", which includes a whole lot more people than the tiny minority of those bigots.

Sorry that you live in a bubble of bigots, but it is not a general or universal experience.

Just grow an unkempt beard and wear overalls.

Well it looks like your garden has at least a double function - it filters out women with weird ideas about gender and sexuality 😁

I literally know someone like this…

/s maybe

Well done; that gave me a chuckle....

Its not gay if it your own soapy fingers right....right guys....oh fuck maybe I'm gay. No I can't be, I hate the gays!!!!

• some closeted jock probably.

Fellas, it's it okay to have a boywife?

Plowing them fields is hard work.

I had 2 older brothers and 1 younger while growing up, we lived rurally and we would have a huge garden and we were all expected to work in it. Personally, i liked it, but I didn't always like it cuz I was a kid I guess, but I liked it enough I have my own garden now and nobody forced me.

I was also homeschooled, so I didn't know a lot people, but I never got made fun of for gardener.

I refer more to growing flowers as the main event. Most people I know who garden outside use flowers in the way you described.

I do however have one extremely "dudebro" guy friend who literally grew almost nothing but flowers for a few years, specifically to sell them to a florist :P

I grew up assuming every adult should be self-sufficient, so I learnt all of cooking, cleaning, gardening, basic repairs, home maintenance, sewing, etc. I think the most likely people to have a problem with that never learnt it themselves, so they feel inadequate.

It became an issue in my first serious relationship because she didn't cook or clean much. She definitely never tried to nurture so much as a plant. I had no problem with that because I could, but she started to feel less feminine, and eventually turned it around on me. The guys she left me for were completely useless, but they didn't highlight her insecurities so she was happy. At least for a short while.

People who are confident in their identity and abilities don't do this, and that's who you want to find anyway, regardless of gender.

Traditionally it's been similar to cooking:

Farmer/chef? That's a man's work.

Gardener/home cook? That's a woman's work.

Fortunately we've got shows like the Great British Bake Off and a myriad of popular YouTube gardening and home cooking channels featuring men to help shake this up, but sadly it's still something that's seen as gendered by way too many folks. Still, if spicy peppers and cacti (and on the cooking side dishes like pizza) help get insecure men in the door, that's great. But I'm with TTF: it may not be a strong stereotype, but I've also observed it.

That's sad

Yep. Based on age and mortgage length, and beurocracy they said I had to take out a life insurance policy which got denied due to health factors.

CICO score was too low

Jesus, guys cant even wear sunglasses while driving cars now without it being seen as some kind of weird statement about what plants they do or dont grow...

Not sure don't care, I dont consume spicy food because I think it makes me strong I eat spicy food because it makes me feel and id rather not develop a drug addiction :3

Exactly right. Gender is performance. We commonly enhance this performance through clothing, the way we speak and how we refer to ourselves; this is not the only ways with which it's done though. I think it would be rude to criticise a trans man for affirming their gender by growing a beard for example. However when it comes to cis men in particular, the way they reinforce their gender is often mocked. So what if the plants some grows makes them feel more comfortable in their gender.

What someone sees as affirming their gender is entirely up to them. Plenty of men do feel more masculine doing things like not using a straw, eating certain meals, listening to certain music, ect. Women might wear clothing that emphasises their figure. Some trans men feel affirmed in their gender by growing a beard, trans women might train their voice to feel more feminine. Gender is a performance and we all constantly make decisions to reinforce it. Thinking growing plants is gender affirmation isn't a problem, it's just a reality you're not living. If someone grows those kinds of plants and it reinforces their gender identity, that's valid and more power to them.