Basically just something people say that indicates a position indirectly, like how seperatists from a given region might always say they're from [region] and not [country] or how trump supporters call AI "SI" now.

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[–] 222 points 2 weeks ago (61 children)

I'll contribute. I refer to my wife as my "partner".

People on the left just continue conversation no problem. People on the right pause and you can see the wheels turning.

I'm a white not very masculine male.

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  • [–] [S] 64 points 2 weeks ago (15 children)

    Very good example, thank you, whenever someone says "partner" I immediately assume they're at least somewhat woke.

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  • [–] 25 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)

    Okay, but what if they also have some ridiculous 10 gallon hat on?

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  • [–] 20 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

    I'm from Texas, so it works both ways... Pardner hat tip 🤠

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  • [–] 9 points 2 weeks ago

    I’m from Oklahoma, I wear a ten gallon hat most days to work my acreage, to walk my doggies, when I have to work markets, and I’m so woke the coffee needs me to get it up early in the morning.

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  • [–] 3 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    Okie here. "Pardner" is one thing. Put a hard "T" in it and it's another.

    English is so fucking weird. Then I read about various Chinese dialects and think, "How could anyone learn that?!" Same as I learned English I guess. :)

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  • [–] 4 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    It's not actually accurate to spell it "pardner", it's more of an emphasis on softening the "tee" sound because that's how you'd say it with a southern accent.

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  • [–] 10 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

    When they say "property" on the other hand...

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  • [–] 8 points 2 weeks ago* (1 child)

    Another white not very masculine male here - which I think is every bit as normal as being a woman who isn't an insanely hot babe. It's weird when things that are almost fringe become unattainable standards for a vast majority who really have no reason to feel inadequate.

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  • [–] 6 points 2 weeks ago

    The "white not very masculine male" piece was added to highlight that some people make assumptions about my sexuality when I use the word partner.

    I'm plenty confident and happy with myself. I'm pretty fit, just not big.

    I'm happy to give out hugs though! The marketing world is hell bent on making people feel inadequate so I understand your sentiment.

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  • [+] -19 points 2 weeks ago* (27 children)

    The first time a friend referred to me wife as my "partner", I questioned his choice of words because he was well aware that I'm not gay.

    Like, I would still just carry on in convo, but if I hear "partner", I make a mental note that they're gay. The correlation has close to a 100% hit rate.

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  • [–] 28 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)

    Hetero people who don't believe in marriage and/or don't like husband/wife titles sometimes use titles like partner too because girlfriend/boyfriend doesn't sound serious enough I guess. Common amongst my social circle but I get why it's usually a dog whistle.

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  • [+] -14 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

    "partner" sounds like you're lawyers. just make up a word, or take one from another language. we use "sambo".

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  • [–] 22 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    We have a perfectly good word in the English language, it's "partner"

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  • [–] 23 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)

    You know what's funny about that? A lot of my hetero friends also say partner.

    I started using it because it removes the baggage that gendered terms carry. My wife is my best friend. I like to do everything with her. We split chores pretty evenly.

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  • [–] -2 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    A lot of my hetero friends also say partner...

    ...in my region of English speakers.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 week ago*

    Fwiw I do this in three languages. It's not just English. It's literally all spelled and pronounced partner and means partner. Somehow even the connotations stayed intact. There's probably more languages that I don't regularly speak that have it too

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  • [–] 16 points 2 weeks ago* (1 child)

    Online, at least, I've probably heard more hetero people than gay people use "partner." In some cases they were in fact perfectly conventionally full-blown married, they just weren't interested in sharing any more details than they had to to tell whatever story they were telling, because that detail wasn't important for the story.

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  • [–] 2 points 2 weeks ago*

    That checks out. You'd use the term to be deliberately vague. Online, you'd be giving away your gender and marital status to the scraperbots. In person, a vague response lands differently. Particularly when speaking one-on-one.

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  • [–] 9 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    I know many (myself included) who are in heterosexual relationships and say partner due to not being married. It's a pretty common thing.....

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  • [–] 15 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
  • [–] -1 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)

    Same. You're getting downvoted because lemmy cannot allow for regional language distinctions. Not even different countries, regions. It's a big world.

    No one where I'm at would refer to a married couple as partners. Nothing wrong with that, but it usually connotes a gay relationship.

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  • [–] 6 points 2 weeks ago

    I promise you it's not that. It's the way that individual wrote their comment. Like it was offensive to be considered gay. Why does it matter?

    And you keep trying to tie it to a region. I think the only "regional" distinction you can make is rural vs anywhere else. But that's more population density related not regional. It's not really a pop vs soda situation.

    Maybe you and this other person should reconsider your assumptions about the usage of the word "partner" hahahaha.

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  • [+] -25 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)
  • [–] 14 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    New account troll. Tagged, will not engage with further.

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  • [–] 21 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    Gawd but he NAILED me. Listening to Wait Wait and rasing chickens. Which are, btw, fantastic for making compost.

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    [–] 99 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

    I'm a self proclaimed crazy cat lady. I also work in a field that has a lot of interaction with the police. I used to have a pin attached to my work badge that said "All Cats Are Beautiful".

    What? I just love cats ;)

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  • [–] 6 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
  • [–] 65 points 2 weeks ago (9 children)

    I always throw an occasional “streets ahead” in my conversation just to see if they’re a Community watcher. Most of the people around me are streets behind, though.

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  • [–] 14 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    it's like giving them an all tomato.

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  • [–] 5 points 2 weeks ago* (1 child)

    I used to do the same thing. Then I decided to actually look up the saying and found out they are both pretty coming British phrases. I was very disappointed.

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  • [–] 45 points 2 weeks ago (15 children)

    My favorite dog whistle (that went over my head, because I was not the audience for it) was the Subaru "Come out and play" commercial.

    If I remember it correctly, the ad was mostly footage of Subaru SUVs driving over rocks and through streams while a voice over talks about the cars' off-road capabilities. The ads would always end with the narrator saying "Subaru invites you to come out and play.”

    As a straight man, I always assumed that the commercial was about how much fun it is to drive a Subaru up a mountain. Apparently, I was missing the point. The nature footage was all a distraction to pacify the straights. The real commercial was just the sentence fragment "Subaru invites you to come out". It was meant to say that Subaru supports queer people. It was a resounding success in promoting the 'Subaru driving lesbian' stereotype.

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  • [–] 6 points 2 weeks ago

    There was a whole campaign in the 90’s. The license plates were mostly lesbian coded, they included the Wizard of Oz cast or a certain lesbian tennis player, I think another tag line was “let’s go camping”. It was fun finding out about that because I had a lot of the National Geographic magazines that they had add pages in.

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  • [–] 5 points 2 weeks ago (13 children)

    That seems like a big stretch of interpretation, no?

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  • [–] 10 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

    It's fully not, the head of marketing at the time actually has done multiple interviews about it.

    "Subaru Lesbian" had become a meme in the queer community, and someone internal to Subaru found out that on self-reporting surveys of Subaru owners, Lesbians made up a surprising amount of the respondents

    So Subaru decided to embrace it, with thinly-veiled advertising targeting lesbians

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  • [–] 9 points 2 weeks ago (8 children)

    Yes and no. Subaru has a strong reputation in the queer community (or at least used to) because they were one of if not the first conpany to publically sponsor a queer sports player (female tennis player if memory serves correct but im sure somebody will correct me if im wrong). So even if not their intent, it's easy to see how it could be interpreted as such. They didn't earn the name "lesbaru" for nothing, they actually intentionally advertised to the queer community going back to the 90s if I'm not mistaken !

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  • [–] 2 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    Now hold on, I don't care about sports or cars but I like lesbians, and the Subaru ad and the female tennis player were all part of a fiction television show, about lesbians called, "The L word."

    I don't think these things happened in real life.

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  • [–] 2 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    The more you know.
    Still seems like a stretch but it hurts nobody to believe it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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  • [–] 41 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    Ceationists calling it "intelligent design" rather than creationism

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  • [–] 12 points 2 weeks ago

    While there are definitely some non-nazi creationist, man, creationism is its own right wing agenda. Louise Agasazzi was a fucking racist piece of shit, and hated Darwinism because he thought all the "races" had a different origin. And then contemporary Creationists have their very ownMike Johnson who's an author on the Answers in Genesis website. And Answers in Genesis itself is a Nationalist alt right political organization. Creationism is just excuse for them to hate the gays, the trans, and the abortors.

    So yeah, I guess they aren't technically Nazis...they are cut from the same cloth. They may not goose step, but they sure like carrying water for the goose steppers.

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  • [–] 77 points 2 weeks ago* (1 child)

    ITT people talking about Nazi dog whistles

    I was voting and one of the people I looked up for judge had “EMPATHY” as a big point for her, considering a lot on the right have said empathy is bad/a weakness/the problem and judges are supposed to be nonpartisan I considered it to be a dog whistle. She also had a lot of good stuff in her background but having EMPATHY in big bold letters seemed purposeful

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