I got to see them at Austin City Limits one year. It turned me into a lifelong Cake fan.

Imma go eat sum

Why iv when you can boof

Right! And fairly cheaply (less so than a couple years ago, but still)

Just seems self explanatory that when noticing the flavors of coffee beans is being mocked, the mocker doesn't prioritize flavor.

Why do you think this is about drinking coffee that tastes bad? I hate flavored coffee.

This post isn't about flavored coffee. It's about the stuff you're saying you love:

a variety of those flavors from beans grown in different places and in different preparations

Because that is the whole meme?

Usually the "notes of" doesn't mean added flavorings, it's just a taste profile similar to describing wines or perfumes.

Apparently a trained palette can distinguish different notes, but that requires trying each one in isolation which is difficult for the average person to do.

For me I can only really identify bitterness, acidity, body, and strength. That's all a casual drinker really needs in order to describe what they like.

• The bitterness is self-explanatory, and depends on the beans, how they're roasted, how they're brewed, etc.
• The acidity is the brightness that you can taste in something like a light roast. Try it side-by-side with a dark roast to taste the difference.
• Body is the thickness of the mouthfeel. The best way to describe it is like drinking whole milk vs. skim milk. Light roasts usually have a lighter body, like water. Dark roasts have a heavier body, not quite like whole milk but maybe skim.
• And strength is self-explanatory. Light roasts are technically stronger because some of the caffeine breaks down when heated (green coffee, sometimes called golden coffee, is the strongest because it isn't roasted), but I find the difference is negligible. The main factors for determining strength seems to be how it's ground and how it's brewed.
  • The finer it's ground, the more surface area so the stronger the infusion, that's why espressos and turkish coffee are so strong (also because they might blend some robustica in with their arabica, which makes it more bitter but also has more caffeine)
  • Also higher grounds::water ratios means there's more caffeine, but too high and it gets undrinkably bitter with an extremely thick body (sometimes called "motor oil" for this reason)

That all being said, some roasters do add artificial flavor directly to their beans, but usually those are called "flavored," not "notes of"/"hints of".

And yeah, skip me with those flavored syrups. If I want something fancy I'll add real cocoa or some herbs or something, but that's a rare inkling for me and those syrups are just kinda gross.

Some coffee beans with no additives whatsoever can be described like this post did. I don't like additives or other weird coffee things. Beans, and grinder, and a french press is all you need

They are discussing the flavors of the beans.

Have you ever had espresso in a third wave café ? because most of them have the same "feel". The only difference is in the smell and the taste. The taste and the strength of the coffee are related but not mutually exclusive. You can make a coffee with 5g of coffee and you can make a coffee with 30g of coffee. Obviously the latter will hit like a sledgehammer no matter what kind of coffee you use. But both will taste more like coffee when there's good beans with a proper roast instead of the "classic" burnt, bitter roast.

Also, 99% of italian baristas just push a button to get coffee from a grinder then they slot it into the espresso machine and press another button to make the machine push water through the puck. There's no skill involved. There's a guy that works for the espresso machine maker that comes and calibrates the machine and the grinder and that's the only guy with any skill in the process. And even that job isn't that hard. Only third wave coffee shops still bother to calibrate their own machines(and even then, many don't, from what I've seen) or use any other process that actually requires skill or a recipe.

I meant emotionally cold, but your line is funnier.

It's getting hard to find here, too. Lotta places just stopped carrying it and I do not know why because the business itself is still around and going strong, and they are constantly selling out more than Monster or Redbull which everyone carries an excessive amount of.

You can get cans at Dollaramas in ON for sure, but you're right, I haven't seen the canister-style bottles for a looong time.

Used to drink unhealthy amounts of that shit.

Sure, I felt that way when I was younger. Now I want caffeine, flavor, an extra kick from my little flask, AND a bump of cocaine.

I would argue you only like it that way due to exposure to other mis guided coffee drinkers and if you had a chance to reset your tastes you'd come to love a nice light to medium roast with hints of cherry and caramel.

ITT: Folks who don't know a light roast has more caffeine than dark, and muddier coffee does not equate to more caffeine.

Agreed.

Yeah I've tried a few different things. Most of them only get it down to a kind of "tolerable" on par with knocking back a really rough dose of like cough syrup in how pleasant it is. I still end up needing an amount of sugar that makes me uncomfortable having.

I know you can, I just don't feel good personally about the amount of sugar and such I need to add before it stops kicking me in the face.

TBF these were ships designed in the 1970s.