I would imagine your friends are used to their parents acting older and/or more mature because they are older. He's probably just a completely different generation from your friends parents.

It's also common for people who have a child at such a young age to have their maturity stunted. He didn't get to finish out his youth like his peers so he's still grasping for it. When his friends were out partying at the age of 21 he was trying to support a toddler.

Other than taking care of himself, and meeting his familial and financial obligations and responsibilities, there's no way a 36 year old is "supposed" to behave. Though it's hard to tell as you may have painted a portrait through rose colored glasses.

According to Pokemon he is decrepit.

That's bullshit people in their ~30's tell other people in their ~30's. I've always been the same and done the same things. For example, in my late 20's, 30's, if someone saw me skateboarding, they'd tell me to act my age. In my 40's it was a cool curiosity, and in my 50's it's inspirational.

When people put others down and tell them to act their age, its a "them" problem. It's their hangups, insecurities, and jealousy showing, not the person living their life as best they can.

Depending who you ask,

Compared to a teen ? It's old

Compared to a fresh retiree ? It's young

To be the father of a 18 yeard old kid ? That's prettty young

Objectively it's prime adulthood

Old? 36? When I was 36 I could still stand up without my joints making a noise like glass shattering.

I hope 36 isn’t old. I’m about to turn 40.

Sounds like you have an awesome dad!

how is a 36-year-old supposed to act?

How ever they want!

Your dad is a millennial (and it appears he had you when he was just 18 as well), so he’s more in touch with technology and social media. As an older millennial as well, I feel like my generation definitely acts younger than gen x and boomers when they were my age. Your friends’ parents are probably in those generations, and your dad is just young in relation to your age.

My dad was 45 when he had me, yours was 18. I had the opposite experience because my parents were so much older than my friends' parents. I think that's the biggest part of what you're seeing: your dad is just younger than your friends' dads.

But to your broader question, there is no way a person is "supposed to act" at a given age, but there are some norms. For instance, a lot of folks who party a lot in their teens and twenties get bored with that at some point. Also, working to earn a living to feed the family often leaves people more with out and preferring something quiet at home to going out with a bunch of people.

I can't say as I'm in my late 50 and still watch cartoons. Do what makes you happy and fuck acting your age.

I have one single criteria for defining an adult.

That is:

"To be an adult you need to understand when it is appropriate to be childish"

If he does that, then there is no problem.

Lol. I’m 32. The thought of having a 14 year old is a terrifying concept to me. I’m still waiting to grow up.

Honey, at your age I thought 35 was old. At 35 now, it's really just a matter of perspective. You're dad isn't old, he just ain't young. I still go out to raves and party, just not as often as I did in my twenties and I like to have a Disco nap before heading out to the rave that opens at midnight til the morning.

How is a 36 year old supposed to act? Well, we define that by being in our mid thirties and acting how we want. You're doing the same at 18, defining how 18 year olds act.

Don't sweat how you're "supposed to be", just take care of yourself and do what ya need to do to be healthy and happy.

Beats me. I just turned 44 and I typically spend my weekends smoking weed and playing Xbox. 🤷🏻‍♂️

There is no “acting your age”, there are only stereotypes, expectations and some people who are afraid acting out of those.

As they say, it's middle aged.... as in not old or young.

His fun time is over regardless, he is supposed to be a factory slave, and that is what really pisses people off.

You are basically expected to spend the rest of your youth, away from eyes, degrading your body so the next generation can play their part in their 20's (pretending to be living it out, with fake experiences), then go to the soul-eating factory to continue the cycle.

Then your dad does this, and pisses the slavers off.

Not at all. I'm 64. Moved from my country to another one about 30 years ago. I was 33 when I came here. It feels like I was over there for 10 years and here for another another 10 years.

In my mind I'm 40.

Life is short, but moreso in the way you feel than in the actual numbers. Numbers are only that, a number. Your life is not measured by days, but by events. Start doing awesome stuff.

Your dad had you waaaay too young

I'm 39, in my head it doesn't feel much different than 18. More responsibility, more experience, less desire to party, but overall the only thing that actually changed was how many times the earth circled the sun.

You act how you want to act. My stepmother is 70, she said she still feels like she's 20 in her head, still smokes weed lol

and he’s really into nightlife and partying.

Everything else I wouldn't blink at, but I would wonder what kind of places Dad likes to party at.

Kinda jealous that you're 18 with a 36 year old father. My old man is one of my best friends, but he is 65 and starting to show it. Climbing trips, skiing, sparring, all things we still do but only occasionally now. Be grateful for your parents youth, especially if they managed to raise a healthy, financially stable family. You have so much time to spend with them, and it sounds like you enjoy their company. I am seriously very envious.

Nah, that's prime-of-life territory.

How is a 36 year old supposed to Act.

Anyway they want. This will hurt your feelings but he sure isn't supposed to care what a bunch 18 year olds think about it.

As someone near that age - this is the prime of my life. 30s are great. You have enough money to do things and enough stability to not worry as much.

I go to concerts all the time and if I was anywhere near a nightclub, I'd probably go there too. I'm trying to break into the rave scene and let loose with those bunch as well.

Age is just a number. Fun is forever.

However the heck you want.

Im similar age and I play video games daily (mostly classic consoles but newer oc stuff sometimes) play in multiple bands, run around outside and build rc car tracks if im bored and its not -20 degrees. There's no rules.

When you stop playing, you get old.

And if other people turn their noses up at you, theyre likely jealous.

I just wanted to give some texture to the conversation here.

Myspace, facebook, digg, twitter, and youtube all launched before you were born. They may not have been popular yet until 2008-2009, but it's very likely your dad has been using some form of social media for the last 18 years.

You need to start thinking about funeral plans. The fact that you haven't drafted a will, found an aged care facility for him or had a priest read him his last right shows incredible negligence and possible elderly abuse on your part. For shame.

Doing whatever makes you happy regardless of what others think is what makes your dad an adult.

Your friends are thinking of it like kids, where you don't want to be perceived as younger than you actually are because being an older kid or teen is 'cool'.

But as you get older the differences start to flatten and ideally you start acting like 'you' rather than like 'your age' or whatever external criteria.

36 is not old lmao. Your friends probably have parents in their late 40s/early 50s and so expect your parent to be like theirs

Old really is how you feel. I feel old now (48, going on 49), but only because of how my life turned out and certain events that I have to deal with (divorce, single fatherhood, getting colonoscopies, etc) by myself. I certainly don’t have as much fun as I used to, and that definitely plays a huge part in feeling old.

All that to say that if your dad is having fun, “not acting his age”, then good for him! I hope he gets many more years of that before shit has to get serious.

To directly answer your question: a 36-old is supposed to act however they want to (within moral reason of course), so long as they and the people around them are enjoying it.

Huh, I'm slightly older than your dad. As for "how is a 36-year-old supposed to act?" - that depends a lot from person to person. I'm a fucking hermit who works with IT and hates corporate social media. A friend of mine from high school is still one that goes to bars and parties with his wife for both to drink, eat and listen to live music, both also often post to instagram.

Yes. I am 35. So, I am not old yet. But, 36 is definitely old.

30 is the new 20

Well, it's about half of the average human expectancy. It's really a "is that glass half full or empty situation".

Old for what? shuffle board?

For nightlife he in a grandpa among the early 20 years olds.

That would be like if I had a kid 11 years ago. I cannot imagine having a kid now, let alone 11 years ago when I was 18.

Age is relative. Age is a state of mind. Both of these statements are true to some extent at any given time. Both are informed by age-related factors within and without what- or whoever is being assessed as being old.

That is, if I were a 36-year-old with a chronic pain condition, I'd feel a lot older than an otherwise healthy 36-year-old, and that doesn't even touch on mental health and general disposition.

And either way, if I were a 72-year-old - because why not, let's double it again - both of those hypothetical people would be youngsters, and an 18-year-old would be practically a baby.

A 36 year old is supposed to act however they want xD There are some expectations about maturity in certain areas (knowing how to handle money, being better with social situations, etc), but stuff like posting online? My girlfriend has 2 Tumblr blogs because she kept hitting the limit of 50 queued posts a day, and she's 40. Boyfriend spends a lot of his time playing video games, and smoking, also 40. I'm 30, and spend a lot of my time playing video games, and on Lemmy/Friendica/general web stuff. Hell, other person in my life (same age as me) has bags decked out in sanrio stuff, with cutesy stickers on every electronic device they own. I know people in their 50s, and 60s who do all this same stuff, too.

I have a couple ideas on what happens with that, though:

Idea 1: I think it's partly perspective. When you're 18 5 years feels like forever. You were 13 then! At 23 you'll be old as shit compared to now! (Not really, you change a lot less per year as an adult than as a child, and teen).

Idea 2: Different, but still perspective. My parents felt young as shit (my parents were 18, and 19 when I was born) to me because I wasn't raised by them. When I turned 20 my uncle, who would have been ~40, felt more like an older peer than a grown-up. Why? I wasn't raised by my parents! My grandma would have been 45 when I was born, and my great grandma (her mom) would have been 61. They're who raised me. I always felt I saw the adults around me as younger than all of my peers did, likely partly due to that. "The teacher's not old, my grand aunt still gets out there and mows an entire acre of grass every week, and she's 50! The teacher's not old at 28. That's my mom's age, and she's still basically a teenager!" sort of thinking.

You kinda just... Never stop feeling like a teenager, in a way? You change a lot, you mature, you get jobs, etc. But I don't feel particularly "different" to how I did when I was 15. I still feel like me, just now I think 15 year old me was an idiot, one of my joints hurts sometimes, and I have carpal tunnel. You don't really feel old until your age starts making a noticeable dent in what you can do, which might be at 40, but might not be until 70.

Looking from 48 I'd say not. When I was 36 I was unmarried. Now I'm married with 2 sprogs. Feels like an eternity ago, and I don't feel particularly old.

I dated a 20 year old when I was 34.

I often hear I'm "not like my friends' parents" from my own kids now that I'm 51.

No one has to become like their own parents just because they get older. As long as it's something that you do because it's who you are instead of trying to act younger - where it just becomes cringe - that's "your age".

/GenX: We just don't gaf.

Having read these comments, all I want to say is: don't ever correct me when I call Westerners a bunch of hedonistic, lost, childish and unserious people. You can be mad and downvote me because you don't have the maturity to understand being called out is for your own good but please don't deny it. Were I part of your sociocultural group but normally developed, thinking and acting my age, this thread would be very depressing.

A 36yo with a child should not be "really into nightlife and partying", I can tell you that much.