Pastor Mark Burns, the president's informal "spiritual advisor," wants to make one thing very clear about the extremely tall gold statue of Donald Trump that was officially dedicated last week in Doral, Miami. "Let me be clear: this is not a golden calf. We worship the Lord Jesus Christ and Him alone," he wrote on Twitter.

He's technically right, just as Rene Magritte was technically right that his painting of a pipe was not actually a pipe. In the most literal sense, the statue of Trump, which is named "Don Colossus" is not a golden calf.

Despite the president calling it "The Real Deal - GOLD," on Truth Social, the statue is not made of gold. Unlike the golden calf, which was made from melting the jewelry of the Egyptians, the Trump statue is not actually made of solid gold. "Don Colossus" is cast in bronze and covered in gold leaf, making it much, much less valuable. It is also obviously not a calf, as calves are baby cows, and the statue is certainly not a baby cow.

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[–] 140 points 6 months ago (7 children)

It's still definitely an idol, though.

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  • [–] 98 points 6 months ago* (8 children)

    I'd like to ask Pastor Burns if he's read the book of Daniel, particularly chapters 3 and 4.

    God struck Nebuchadnezzar (who likewise had a golden statue built for his entire kingdom to worship) with madness for 7 years for his pride.

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  • [–] 76 points 6 months ago (5 children)

    We're having madness right now.

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  • [–] 35 points 6 months ago (4 children)

    True, but in Nebuchadnezzar's case his kingdom was taken from him for those 7 years...

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  • [–] 81 points 6 months ago (7 children)

    Sometimes I wish God was real, so we'd get to see him swoop in and smite these fucking hypocrites.

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  • [–] 23 points 6 months ago (4 children)

    if god isn't real it is up to us to make the world a just god would make.

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  • [+] 9 points 6 months ago (4 children)
  • [–] 3 points 6 months ago* (3 children)

    Anarchy would be it if humans were capable of self governance and not being cunts. But it depends on all humans working together in sync, so it'll never happen.

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  • [–] 1 point 6 months ago (2 children)

    Depends. Are those innate traits or learned skills?

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  • [–] 9 points 6 months ago

    I think that every time one of these psychos assumes room temperature. Upon hearing of their death, I'd love the satisfaction of imagining their reaction upon entering Hell for the eternity of fiery torture that we've been promised.

    But alas, it's all a fairy tale, as real as Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy.

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  • [–] 51 points 6 months ago (7 children)

    the statue is certainly not a baby cow.

    No, it's a giant pig.

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  • [–] 17 points 6 months ago (4 children)

    Now, be nicer to pigs, they're intelligent, capable of empathy. It's actually a giant pile of gold leafed shit.

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  • [–] 47 points 6 months ago

    …if you feel the need to let everyone know how much the golden idol isn’t a golden idol, perhaps you’ve forgotten what an idol is and why your religion speaks against them.

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  • [–] 36 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    "Let me be clear: this is not a golden calf. We worship the Lord Jesus Christ and Him alone,"

    Which is why they erected a giant golden statue of the president of the United States. Makes perfect sense!

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  • [–] 30 points 6 months ago (5 children)

    This “church” wouldn’t know Christ if the Christ walked up to them and said to love their neighbors as Christ loved them.

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  • [–] 15 points 6 months ago (3 children)

    They would know Christ: they would be in the front row yelling for another crucifixion

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  • [–] 8 points 6 months ago*

    Indeed: most of present day America, especially the far-right, would be incredibly hostile towards a middle eastern guy preaching a philosophy of peace and equality and who was openly against the "money lenders".

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  • [–] 29 points 6 months ago* (2 children)

    It's not a golden calf

    No. It's a golden pig-like thing that is fatter and smellier than a pig.

    But also: If they worship Jesus Christ, and Jesus Christ alone that's pretty weird. What about God and the Holy Spirit? Did this pastor even go to seminary school?

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  • [–] 26 points 6 months ago (10 children)

    Do those bastards not see what can happen to despots?

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  • [–] 2 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    A lot of dictators die peacefully in their sleep a night. 😞

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  • [–] 1 point 6 months ago

    of natural causes too. once your fatal bullet poisoning reachees the butthole they have to replace your legs with wheels and your arms with those extendo boxing gloves or else we wouldn't have enough whimsical things to laugh at in the world (like when's the last time you saw a clown in a bathtub being pulled down the river by a flock of geese).

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  • [–] 2 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    They always think they're the exception. It's a symptom of their narcissistic personality disorder.

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  • [+] 24 points 6 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 20 points 6 months ago

    These people love vice signalling. This is clearly a giant golden idol they worship. They love their pedo prince so much because he's all the vices.

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  • [+] 17 points 6 months ago (4 children)
  • [–] 17 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    and God later sent a plague upon the people for their idolatry.

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  • [–] 16 points 6 months ago

    We are witnessing Olympic levels of mental gymnastics here.

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  • [–] 14 points 6 months ago

    It's obviously meant to be an homage to medical doctors.

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  • [–] 13 points 6 months ago

    My 'Not a golden idol' shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt.

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  • [–] 24 points 6 months ago (5 children)
  • [–] 27 points 6 months ago (3 children)
  • [–] 12 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    How long before he's charging admission just as far as the statue, so MAGAs can kneel to it?

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  • [–] 11 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    My first thought went to this:

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  • [–] 10 points 6 months ago* (1 child)

    It is also obviously not a calf, as calves are baby cows, and the statue is certainly not a baby cow.

    Right...bcz it's a statue of a large heffer.

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  • [–] 10 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    It's not an idol, it's just a gold-looking representation of something a large group of people fervently honor and pray to, and according to their own chit-chat, hold in higher respect than jesus or god. And nothing more.

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  • [–] 8 points 6 months ago*

    This statue is a PERFECT representation of Trumpism, he can't resist revealing himself by the art he chooses. Reminds me of Mussolini.

    (caption: a photo of the massive Mussolini head staring down a public square)

    I think it's because these personalities surround themselves with sycophants, and this leads to them being isolated and unaware of their own ridiculousness. A universal truth across the centuries.

    Ye shall know them by their fruits. ~Matthew 7:16

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  • [–] 8 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    What would Moses do?

    Throw the idol into a fire, I guess.

    The statue, too.

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  • [–] 7 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    If it walks like a duck, and talks like a duck, it's a golden idol.

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  • [–] 7 points 6 months ago

    I can't wait until the righteous americans eventually tear all of that shit down just like the people did with Saddam.

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  • [–] 6 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    Forgot to have the dick hanging out of the statutes pants. You know, for all the sucking the right does.

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  • [–] 5 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    So what the fuck is it then Burns??

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  • [–] 5 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    cast in bronze and covered in gold leaf

    Why use gold leaf instead of electroplating it? Isn't gold leaf more liable to fall off when exposed to the elements?

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  • [–] 9 points 6 months ago* (1 child)

    As per usual with all the shit the conservatives do, it is cheaper. Electroplating requires a gigantic bath or a massive hermetically sealed room that can fit the entire volume of the statue. Such a thing either doesn't exist, would be irrational to pay to build or, if it exists, it is really expensive as a service to use it (repurposing a PCB plant, maybe?) Modern public consensus also considers gold anything to be tacky and corny, of very bad taste. Despite the rise of gold prices, the jewelry market is somewhat stagnant. It looks gaudy to have much gold anything around for decoration. So it stands to reason that there's actually few services that could electroplate gold to copper at such a scale, much less so a statue of the turd in chief.

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  • [–] 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

    Shouldn't this article be linked to the post about Trump wanted to check Fort Knox as apparently gold is being stolen?

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