It's the second coming of Terry Davis!

Element Effects

Zodiac sign elements create elemental affinities and oppositions:

Boosted Combinations (tasks thrive under compatible elements):

• 🔥 Fire (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius) × CPU tasks: 1.5x boost
• 🌬️ Air (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius) × Network tasks: 1.5x boost
• 🌍 Earth (Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn) × System tasks: 1.4x boost
• 💧 Water (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces) × Memory tasks: 1.3x boost

Hang on - Aquarius, the water-bearer, is an air element? I'm beginning to think this astrology stuff doesn't make much sense.

I like that water is responsible for memory, like how homeopathic medicine works.

Here's the source - If you don't want to click through 3 different pages to get to it

Reminds me of that story of someone having connection issues based on the phases of the moon finding out it's because the rising tides were lifting someone's boat up and blocking line of sight...

Finally, my handbrake renders will complete when the stars literally align

Great, now my PC can be temperamental because mercury is in retrograde.

We shouldn't stop with the kernel but also apply this to our workflows.

PM sends you an invitation to a meeting? Venus says no.

I want cosmic chaos in my work day.

This gives me a sort of Temple OS vibe. I have a feeling this developer will soon develop his own operating system based on Zodiac signs.

This is how hippie chicks start using linux

This is art

The feature list is where the most fun is had

https://github.com/zampierilucas/scx_horoscope?tab=readme-ov-file#features

• Retrograde Detection
• Lunar Phase Scheduling 😂 etc...

Boss: "Have you finished that new feature yet? The deadline's coming up and the client is getting concerned" Lowly Mortal Programmer: "Sry, you're gonna have to tell the client that Mercury is in retrograde at least until this time next Earth-year"

Oh dear god.

So they've functionally formalized a specific variant of astrology.

... At least it would be consistent in how it is ridiculous, unlike 99.99% of current day astrologers.

OP, you should cross post this to /c/programmer_humor@lemmy.dev, because this is hilarious

So more stable than windows 11? What happens to the cpu when the moon is full and you click on the start menu?

I'm a Capricorn so... You know.

🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️Zampieri. I haven't had the free time and finances to do this. Now can shorten my banterposting.

Man, better hope that realtime linux developers don't have a prankster nature.

Finally a platform home for the Etsy Witches!

Ya know what, could it really be any worse than just letting AI create a scheduler? I’m on board for using it. No more Deadline or Fair Queuing for this guy!

I don't know...

What other weird schedulers could we do, crontab for mars? Seconds to midnight? Death rate?

Waiting on Linus' response... eagerly!

The gravitational pull exerted on the baby caused by the midwife's mass exceeds the gravitational pull of all planets combined by far.

I just can't take people seriously who believe in bullshit like astronomy - so while this may be a fun project, sadly there are going to be people who honestly think this is a thing.

"This is beyond science."

Repo here

Brilliant.

I'd put it up there with the CPU emulator done in LaTeX.

I trust this more than an LLM

This is just using dev/rand/ but with extra steps.

This made me giggle, thanks for sharing

And somehow still more predictable then Windows.