If you really feel that experiencing life as a different gender then there's certainly something worth exploring there. If you haven't already, maybe try looking for a therapist (preferably one who's experienced with gender and sexuality issues). That's really helped me work out a lot of my own stuff.

And hey, maybe there's not much there. Maybe you just want to explore a more feminine presentation. Maybe you're non-binary, fluid, trans, or maybe you're just cis with a healthy dose of curiosity. No harm in trying to figure it out and nothing is set in stone.

It overwhelmingly seems to be male-to-female

I have seen way more trans people who were amab on the internet compared to trans people who were afab even though, as far as i know, there are slightly more transmascs than transfems. I am not the only person who has experienced this

I assume this is caused by people raised up as men being pushed more to places i visit on the internet (like programming and minecraft redstone discord servers, lemmy)

The other user sucks for assigning genders to others, but fuck this comment. "Depressed men idealize the feminine form" reeks of long outdated, bigotry infused science that has led to real harm in our community. Being transfem is one of the most difficult things you can do socially; people will hate you, both as a woman and for being trans. If it actually helps a person's mental health, they are who they say they are.

On top of that, there is nothing wrong with the people who do occasionally enjoy crossdressing; there is nothing insidious about gender non-conformity for fun. Who the fuck cares if a guy occasionally likes being pretty, including receiving positive attention for it? Good for him; it takes bravery on multiple levels. However, those people enjoy being able to take off the dress and live as men most of the time. I want to be a woman when waiting in a doctor's office. I want to be a woman clocking in and clocking out at work. I want to be a woman when nobody is with me and I'm rotting in bed. We are not the same, and that's fine.

Literally none of that idea makes any sense beyond pathologizing behavior that conservatives find icky or abnormal. Your oursider perspective is limited, ignorant, and not really appreciated.

This. I think about this possibility as well. In fact, this might be it.

However, I wanna like me rather than wanting people to like me. And maybe it's the idealization of the feminine.

What I wonder about is whether chronically-online, majorly depressed men idealize the feminine form as having inherent value. “If I was a cute girl people would like me/I wouldn’t be depressed.”

eh, what came first: being chronically depresed or wanting to be more female?