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[–] 135 points 4 months ago (1 child)

[several transfems are typing…]

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  • [–] 43 points 4 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 41 points 4 months ago (12 children)

    Damn, I just want my balls off. I wanna keep my dick.

    What if I just have a nibble?

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  • [–] 7 points 4 months ago* (2 children)

    I'm not sure you really want that. As a horny teen I wanked myself dry a few times and it is painful. Imagine it felt like that every time.

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  • [–] 4 points 4 months ago (5 children)

    I've never heard someone say that before. Why would you want one but not the other, if you don't mind my asking?

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  • [–] 7 points 4 months ago

    Hello! I'm not the person you asked but I figured I'd throw in my experience.

    In my case, if I could snap my fingers and instantly change my penis to a vulva, I would. But I had a haemorroid surgery many years ago, and the month or so afterwards was one of the worst times of my life, so I would prefer it if no surgeon ever went anywhere near my lower trunk ever again.

    But everyone's experience is different. Some women just like to fuck, and of the trans women who do, some don't feel the need to replace the factory installed equipment for doing so.

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  • [–] 3 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    Well, you could still pee standing up.

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  • [–] 1 point 4 months ago (2 children)

    my dude, the she-wee has existed since, uh, plastic. maybe only as long as women have served in the military.

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  • [–] 37 points 4 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 19 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    Free orchidectomy and penectomy? Where are these apples found? Asking for a friend

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  • [–] 19 points 4 months ago* (2 children)

    Shouldn't it be called Instant Trans Apple? Non invasive transition, very convenient.

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago

    I want that apple even more now.

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago

    where could one acquire such an apple, hypothetically?

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  • [–] 15 points 4 months ago (7 children)

    If, hypothetically, some sort of person who didn't have a dick and balls were to eat it?

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  • [–] 18 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    It's expunging 15g of crotchmeat no matter what you do or don't have, so buckle up.

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  • [–] 9 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    you get all the dicksandballses that have fallen off since the last dickandballsless person to eat one

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  • [–] 7 points 4 months ago

    Www.applerankings.com

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  • [–] 13 points 4 months ago

    No negatives you say?

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  • [–] 6 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    it’s black because it grew from an oil spill

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  • [–] 12 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    For those curious, this apple does exist (though it's more of a very dark purple) and it grows at high altitude in Tibet. The altitude gave it its colour.

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  • [–] 2 points 4 months ago*

    dammit i live near apple country (it's why i smoke with apple half the time. applewood is cheap as hell out in placerville) and i have a goal of eating every varietal of apple. just that's it. every varietal of apple. why the hell not when you live near apple country, right? (like i just went out to watsonville and got me some olallieberries and even better got to talk with Nita fuck yeah) you mean i have to fly to tibet to eat this?

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  • [–] 11 points 4 months ago

    Any other transfems want to join me in going on an adventure to find these?

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  • [+] 11 points 4 months ago (4 children)
  • [–] 5 points 4 months ago (3 children)
  • [+] 2 points 4 months ago (3 children)
  • [–] 2 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    That's basically where I was going with the joke, anyway. I'm hoping this could be the change they need to reassess their life and join the human race.

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  • [–] 2 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    i mean, yeah i got you were joking. one of my firmest morals is that people have the right to choose what they put in their bodies and in order to do that they have to know what they are putting in it and what it will do. but like, woooooo this apple is going to forcefemme you is kinda funny.

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  • [–] 10 points 4 months ago

    My sister would love these.

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    An apple a day keeps the doctor away......because now the doctor is too depressed to go to work and be a doctor.....

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    Wow, I’d love to try…

    holdup

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago

    It does not, in fact, do that.

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  • [–] 4 points 4 months ago

    sold!

    we're forcefemming the whiteblackdiamondhouse~

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  • [–] 7 points 4 months ago (5 children)

    If mine fell off, I would make a device to keep it alive so I could play with it when ever I wanted to. Plus now that's detached you could toss it around, let her borrow it for a few nights or let her use it in the shower. Lots of good things could be coming from this. We just don't see it because we haven't been in this position before.

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  • [–] 3 points 4 months ago

    I want to use this meme to draw attention to the fact that many fruits have a lot of varieties. Usually, people know this because of wines and grapes, since concord, pinot noir/grigio, chardonnay, nebbiolo are all different kinds of grapes and are vastly different. The same is true with apples too, but most people are familiar with the few they can pick at orchards. If there was an apple that could do what's described in the meme, I wouldn't be particularly surprised.

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  • [–] 3 points 4 months ago

    Oh my god, it's from the garden of eden myth

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  • [–] 3 points 4 months ago

    I feel like going full Snow White with and offering Trump an Apple.

    Then again, he doesn’t eat food that was, you know, grown, so….

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  • [–] 2 points 4 months ago

    Can we ship some of these to Peter Thiel’s dialogue meeting

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