Walk directly across the hood.

I exhale sharply through my nose, go around and forget about it 15 seconds later.

I called parking enforcement on this one. Right in front of the job site drive. We don't come here everyday, but when we do, it'd be nice to be able to pull in. They called me when they got to the car and asked if I wanted it toed. I said that they do it all the time but just give a warning, because it's the first time I've called. Next time, it's gone.

I mumble “what an asshole” and move on with my life

Mild annoyance and then continue with my day. If I'm really annoyed report it to whoever issues the parking fines in the area.

Walk over it. Even if it's filmed, they are in a crosswalk what would come of that? Get some friends to do the same. If they don't want their car walked on, don't park on the crosswalk.

Change into my "blind guy" costume and beat the car with my stick until someone stops me.

Ah, Balkans, huh?

Edit: Looks like Portugal plates. They're honorary Balkans.

"Oh thank god! I'm back in Spain. Maybe living in the US was just a horrible nightmare!"

“Hope they get a ticket”

I'd definitely be calling a couple of my wheelchair bound brothers. I'm sure they'd be up for seeing how fast they could crash into it... Maybe not all of them but Dave would, Dave would absolutely ram right into it multiple times (he really doesn't like not having access to a crosswalk).

Walk over its hood. It's technically not illegal in most parts.

Call the cops and wait there to watch it get towed.

It's a tough one honestly, because you never know if its someone that's generally a considerate person but had to park for an emergency.. Or if it's just a general asshole on a standard day.

Judging by the car make and model though (all black Tesla), I'd lean towards the latter.

Nothing, officer. I didn't see who keyed the car.

Buy a roll of those stickers they put on products that is basically impossible to remove without ripping it and always leaves behind adhesive residue. See how much you can cover.

I would think wow that's terrible parking, and would wonder if they'll get a ticket from somebody who makes a living putting tickets on improperly parked cars.

Walk across the crosswalk dozens of times wearing a big, metal belt buckle.

Saying "oops" every time I accidentally run into the car.

"Cool, free stem valves!"

yoink

My reaction would be How did i get to another country?

Climb over the top of it, of course. Preferably with golf shoes.

Must be part of the crosswalk, just walk over it!

Maybe covering everything with cars and car infrastructure was a bad idea.

Mix glitter and superglue in a water balloon

There used to be a website called You Park Like An Asshole that had pre-designed flyers you could attach to cars like this and other such infractions of, uh, good parking etiquette, if not also laws.

Looks like the site is dead, and either way, the other comments suggest this is in a country where the primary language isn't English so their flyers wouldn't be as useful.

... but it doesn't mean that you can't design your own in the local language and shove it under their windscreen wiper. Bonus points for putting it in a sticky-backed plastic envelope. You know. The things that parking tickets usually get put in.

I'm British so I'm going to tut loudly and mutter something under my breath

remember, the aircon input for cars are normally the slot under the windscreen

I'd probably think "God why did I have to come across so many cars and terrible drivers today. Damn I hate cars."

and then walk away.

“Hmpf… what an asshole…” *life goes on *

It's a rich wanker as always. I live in a pretty affluent area and the wealthy think they can break the traffic laws all the time.

I crawl over them and go on with my day. It has resulted in some angry people and police called on me once, but the officer fined the driver for crossing the stopline (it wasn’t a parked car, they were stopped for red) and told me to not do it again.

Impotent Rage

Edit: on second thought, Vienna where i live has an app where you can report stuff like this. Second alternative, call the cops to tow the illegally parked car which is a pretty expensive way to learn that you can't park there.

I will think to myself "fucking swastikar" and move on.

Wait is this Portugal? If I was walking the zebra crossing I would have just walked over the car. Also if you call the police they will tow the car, fine the owner, and even if they come to move it before the tow truck arrives, they still have pay for it in addition

Go back to my home and start a government petition to legalise pedestrians carrying rocket-propelled grenade launchers to better handle situations like this

I dont think the police would care that much if I called them about an improperly parked car. I'd call them anyways and use my best Sheldon Cooper impression and make a huge deal out of it.

I ordered a pack of about a hundred business cards with "YOU OARKED LIKE AN IDIOT" on one side and a list of checkboxes with reasons on the other. Qould probably stick a couple of these at several points around the car