I knew I recognized him from somewhere.

I have no idea who he is, but this is my favorite quote ever, as someone who's both a goth/punk poser and works in cybersecurity.

Once I offered to buy John Waters a drink, and the bartender got offended

Edit: at the very idea that John Waters would ever be charged for a drink

Some people read ebooks, especially if they're in a small apartment

So my steam library isn't enough hur?

Looks at hot accountant.

"QuickBooks"

Close enough?

I have the core rules book, investigator manual, and keeper manual for the Call of Cthulhu TTRPG, does that count?

Does manga count?

Eh, i rent i dont own. Which means i move every few years. Also i have a library card, so i dont own very many books at all. I still read alot tho.

what if all my books are on the compooter

Only fuck people who make an expensive signal like Jay Gatsby.

I think books are cool. Anyone who read books is a cool person and not yet lost to social media addiction. They can still be in the moment with themselves.

I had a period when I could not read a single page in a book because my mind was constantly wanting to use the phone instead. Many people are like that right now.

My books are on my phone…

Sure, the guy has a ton of books in the shelves. But how many mysterious badly sorted storage boxes of books he has? Now that's the real test of character.

Also ask probing questions about how many obsolete programming books he has. It may get awkward but it has to be done.

What if they're hot

Sorry John, I only have physical copies of books with pretty pictures on them.

If you go home with someone and they dont have shoe laces, don't fuck them.

I have lots of books and prefer physical media. I've organized them various ways, mostly by author, then by series name and book number (if applicable), then by book title.

I generally prefer mass market format because it's easier to hold, but sometimes a collectible version is too tempting or, in other cases, the mass market option simply isn't available. As a result, my library consists of a wide variety of shapes and sizes of books.

Unfortunately, for assorted reasons, most of my library is in boxes right now. Less unfortunately, I haven't been dating for a long time. However, back when I was dating and my literature was on shelves around my bedroom, sometimes I would bring a partner home and they would complain about my books not being arranged by size or, alternatively, by color.

Of course they could setup their library however they wanted, but I did feel a bit of despair every time I heard this desire for form over function.

But I can't afford to keep books! They take up a lot of space that requires large rooms with shelves and shit. I can't even afford a decent apartment!

What if I show you my Chinese e-reader with my digital collection of pirated books instead? You like Terry Pratchett?

I use the presence books or an e-reader in a home as a barometer for how much have in common with the people in it. I'm not a snob about it, either. I don't care if its Harry Potter or obscure volumes of post-structural literary criticism. Just read, please.

Keep your condoms behind the books, impress me

Coldness of the word cool isnt my thing. Im more into bloom.

Well it's kinda hard to fuck the books when they don't exist, so yeah that makes sense

Due to a few job losses, moves, and storage losses a while back, I lost and stopped replenishing my physical books, so most of my library is digital. Also helps since I need glasses now.

There are worrying drawbacks to digital also, like whether i might suddenly not own stuff I purchased, but so far it's been better for me.

In suburbia, books are ornaments and rarely read. They are just there to get laid.

I like books but its media in a different form. It could be great or it could be trash. The book format says nothing. I'd consider someone who watches the YouTube channel Angela Collier as more educated than someone who has a bookshelf full of Danielle Steel novels.