Tbh, I tend to do that sometimes. The number of languages I can somewhat understand outnumbers the number of languages I can attempt to speak.

Especially when it comes to reading: it's a lot easier to see a bunch of cognates and understand the jist of the sentence than it is to come up with those words and conjugate, order, and pronounce them correctly.

On multiple occasions, I've tried to use my limited knowledge to order food or something in another language, only to have the person on the other side look at me confused until I restate myself in English.

I like to think of it like Star Wars where everyone just speaks and responds in their own language.

Yeah, that was what I was thinking. There's no way a French person spoke in English of their own volition

A simpler explanation is that people tend not to be able to hear their own accents.

Someone who wasn't brought up speaking French will probably never have an "absolutely perfect" accent. They may think that they sound exactly like everyone around them, but to someone brought up speaking French, they don't.

There are a lot of British actors who do American accents for various parts. These are native English speakers who grew up listening to American accents on TV shows and in movies. They work with dialogue coaches, and can rehearse their lines until they think they can deliver them perfectly in American-style English. Any slips in their accent can be fixed in ADR before the film is released. Yet, many people, including me, are able to spot a few quirks in their speaking and often identify these people as not American.

For French in particular, it has the "u" sound that also exists in German, but doesn't really exist in English. Many people who weren't brought up with that sound can't even really hear it, or can't hear it as different from the "oo" sound that they associate with the letter "u". As a result, words like "ouverture" don't have two distinct "oo / u" sounds for them. So, they might think they're speaking flawlessly and that nobody can notice, but it's really obvious for anybody who was brought up hearing and speaking French.

As someone living in France for a while now, that's exactly what I picked up from immersion, never noticed that before.

“Bonjour ! Euhhh…. Deux croissants s’il-vous-plaît et euhh…. ce sera tout”

Please do "I’m sorry, but I don’t speak French" now, please, thanks, please. :)

And you wonder why people think you are uptight? /s

So basically the same tempo as HEllooo, two croissants please. Taking as much time saying "s'il vous plait" as "please".

Basically talking like a normal person haha.

You describe it and I can hear my aunt (in law) saying it that way. I believe it.

Unless they are Breton

That would be more like "bo------r, (nods vaguely toward the croissants)" the "s'il vous plaît" is implied, but definitely there somewhere. The "merci" will be a slight nod backwards.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzCEZ6KTIS8

The music in that game was phenomenal. It gives me chills.

My only French is from the Talking Heads song "Psycho Killer"

Psycho killer, qu'est-ce que c'est?

The music in that game isn’t French btw

We're tired, or invading, sometimes it's hard to tell.

Not even necessarily on things, just like lean to one side while standing.

I'm Indian and I do it. Do the French not?

Isn't that the name of their national lunch?

When I was in Italy I felt like lieutenant Aldo Rains. Italy was the only place I actually struggled because English was far less common, and when I was in France for a day I had a near fluent linguist with me. I can speak a little German but never had to.

Yeah, i'd instinctively say "je vais vous prendre" in front of the phrase. We have a lot of weird and technically useless or wrong phrase structures like that in everyday language, so speaking grammatically perfect french is basically sus from the start.

Bonjour, je vous prendrais deux croissants s'il vous plait

With about half the letters not pronounced, the "je vous" becoming "j'vou", and a pause with a smile between bonjour and the rest.

This is my struggle learning Mandarin as well. For individual words or short phrases, my pronunciation is pretty good, but for long sentences, my cadence is shit enough that people have trouble following unless I intentionally speak like an idiot. Like, my immediate Chinese speaking family understands, because they are acquainted with my accent, but random people on the street look at me like I'm an idiot.

It's the same in any language, the people that were born learning it spoken will always have an instinct that those who didn't learn until school won't have. That said, if you live there for a decade you would pick it up to.

Ah you discovered the secret. Even among the French, the Parisians have a certain reputation.

I'd just keep speaking French to fuck with them. Two can play at that game. I can't speak French, though.

I had a good friend from France who informed me that Parisians are just arseholes lmao

As an American I'd just be happy you're trying. The fact that you try to speak a native language IMO shows respect, even if it isn't that good. You care enough to try.

I haven’t had issues in Paris, but it might help that I often apologize for my French in advance. I’m Canadian and clearly have learned a different accent, but most people I encountered were quite eager to help me practice.

From my experience in Spain, if you don't speak Spanish and they don't speak English they will still try to help you. In the store they may just show you how much you have to pay on the screen. In other places they will quickly open google translate and use that.

In France they just stare at you and make 0 effort to help. Best they can do is just repeat it in French again.

Wow the only time I'd be considered not enough of a midwestern hick to fit in to Europe

I’ve done it, with a québécois accent, and the fucker still answered me in English. And she was supper polite too. I asked to confirm that I could park my car in the street next to the hotel and she said “I don’t know, I don’t have a car.”

Salut chum! Tabernak, doix crossaints si vous plait.

That'll probably get you shot in France

The French was probably too perfect. Shoulda been:

“Je prends uhhhh deeeeux…deux croissants”. 90% of the French people I know can barely get two words out without a “uhh” or “beuh”.