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[–] 30 points 6 months ago

Imagine saying out loud "Tiananmen Square Massacre 1989" and half the 'smart' devices in your home bricks

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  • [–] 8 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    I love how memes, at this point, are a means to process our cyber anxiety.

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  • [–] 4 points 6 months ago

    I assume it's (loosely!) based on this:

    https://www.theregister.com/2026/04/02/pwned/

    No mention of China - just a rival company finding a hole in the secure network (network enabled coffee maker with a default password) and using it to steal company data.

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  • [–] 14 points 6 months ago* (4 children)

    Is America projecting again? 好没想到的啊!

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  • [–] 2 points 6 months ago (3 children)

    Isn't it public info that Chinese companies are obligated by law to share information with the government?

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  • [–] 14 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    Isn't it public info that the USA has backdoors in every CPU (IME for example), or that NSA collects literally every piece of data going to and from USA, or that the USA illegally spies on its allies in the NATO by tapping phones and transcontinental internet cables? Or that trump literally called for Snowden to be executed for making all of that public?

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  • [–] 8 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    Illegally? No, the NATO allies all work together to catch each other's dissidents. Just because the US has gone off the rails doesnt mean the EU was innocent.

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  • [–] 11 points 6 months ago

    No, the NATO allies all work together to catch each other's dissidents

    Ah yes, well known dissidents like

    checks notes

    Angela Merkel and other EU officials

    Meanwhile in Denmark

    In August 2020, Trine Bramsen who was recently appointed Danish minister of defence in June of the previous year was told of the operation, following which agency head Lars Findsen and three other officials were suspended.[7]

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Dunhammer

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  • [–] 2 points 6 months ago

    Ha fooled them, I only do pour over

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  • [–] 2 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    I think we’re all a little more worried about the child trafficking genocidal state of Israel.

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  • [–] 1 point 6 months ago

    And letting the US government spy on you helps with that?

    In reality, people are built for the stone age and a little out of their depth with 21st century technology. Unless there's some visual indicator of the spying their normal social instincts don't kick in.

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  • 70 comments in c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world view that post
    [–] 118 points 6 months ago (13 children)
  • [–] 12 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    The steam from the water powers a micro rotor and the coffee acts as an antenna, duh

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  • [+] 15 points 6 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 6 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    Dude when I tell people I only do pour over coffee people are always like "you know you can get a coffee maker for 20 bucks"

    I just prefer how little space these things take up. Plus I rarely drink more than 2-3 cups a day.

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  • [–] 5 points 6 months ago

    Oooo, a family member give me their old drip coffeemaker because I took too long with my French press one time while they were visiting. They honestly thought they were being helpful. It's been sitting in the closet since the day they left it here.

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  • [–] 61 points 6 months ago* (2 children)

    Eyes his french press suspiciously

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  • [–] 46 points 6 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 39 points 6 months ago (4 children)

    Shoots coffee maker Americanly. Shoots toaster too, just to be sure.

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  • [–] 2 points 6 months ago (3 children)

    Do toasters die? I've been using the oven whenever I needed toast do to counter space but like the design of a toaster makes me feel like if you shot a hole through a toaster you might just get a toaster that heats most of the bread, and you just have a circle where it doesnt toast. I guess it depends where you shoot it maybe.

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  • [–] 2 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    I think if you broke the element it wouldn't work anymore. I honestly just added the toaster because I thought it was funny. I don't even have one anymore. I have a Ninja Flip multi function toaster oven. Lol.

    I refuse to have any "smart" appliances at all

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  • I'm fairly certain I don't have any smart appliances. Like I'm not sure what I'd even want them to do. Which probably makes me the dumbest appliance in the house. I can't keep a schedule to save my life, so it's not like I could schedule a coffee pot, and I dont really care for coffee. Maybe a tea pot but like why... Id probably rather just have it cold at that point. Hot beverages are a pain to drink because I'm afraid of burning myself over and over which I've done hundreds of times, so I wait for it to be like luke warm and then it really just defeated the purpose.

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  • [–] 30 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    If you bought a coffee pot requiring network access and give it unrestricted internet then you deserved to become a government pawn

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  • [–] 30 points 6 months ago

    Guess I'll have to keep making coffee the old way

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  • [–] 50 points 6 months ago (10 children)

    All jokes aside, IoT devices suck.

    Why does a dishwasher need to connect to a remote server to use its full functionality? Why does my coffee maker need me to start it using an app? At that point it isn't a feature, it's a dependency that the company behind will eventually shut down one way or another.

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  • [–] 23 points 6 months ago (9 children)

    Nothing IoT is allowed in my house if it can't be fully managed locally with Home Assistant.

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  • [–] 9 points 6 months ago (5 children)

    Frankly you shouldn't stop with just IoT devices. My sister wouldn't listen to the HA so she's not allowed over. It was a bit of a fight in the family but the dog listens so it got to stay and I think that's totally reasonable.

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  • [–] 6 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    Damn, which integration did you use for the dog?

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  • [–] 9 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    Ii use esphome to flash the firmware on his shockcollar. Now when he barks the shock collar on my sister goes off and she gets him a treat.

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  • [+] 1 point 6 months ago (3 children)
  • [–] 1 point 6 months ago (2 children)

    I need to get my 3D printer working so I can actually print a housing for my smart thermostat.

    All you really need is a temperature sensor and a 4x relay board.

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  • [+] 1 point 6 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 1 point 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 child)

    I have an automation for controlling bathroom vent fans using a humidity sensor in the bathroom and a reference one outside it if you're interested.

    It also has logic to not turn off the fan if it has a Bluetooth speaker that's playing music (currently using the "Music Active" companion app sensor, Bluetooth MAC was flakey).

    And logic to turn it off if the AC is running and music isn't playing.

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  • [–] 18 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    If the have "reams" of data on me, good luck reading through it all.

    [This is a sarcastically humourous take on the fact that the word "reams" is used, which is a measure of blocks of 500 pieces of paper.]

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  • [–] 13 points 6 months ago (3 children)

    Wait until you find out what they're doing to you through your toilet seat!

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  • [–] [S] 11 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    I don't actually mind that. I kinda like that. (secretly)

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  • [–] 12 points 6 months ago

    I like to imagine the guy who pitched spying on Americans through their coffee makers like "we need to figure out how much coffee Americans are drinking" and everyone in the room was just fully on board with this genius idea.

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  • [–] 12 points 6 months ago

    why would I care? the US is spying on me and they're a much bigger threat to me

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  • [–] 11 points 6 months ago

    I've got a french press. Is it spying on me for china or France. At this point I don't care which one.

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  • [–] 10 points 6 months ago

    Thought that it would be obvious that your $25 smart coffee maker was spying on you.

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  • [–] 11 points 6 months ago (10 children)

    I was gifted a thermal insulated coffee mug with built-in battery to keep hot. Connects to phone via Bluetooth. Got warnings that the mug would be able to track all 50+ Bluetooth MAC IDs that are in range (I’m in an apt building). That mug will never get turned on or used

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  • [–] 4 points 6 months ago (2 children)

    As @Grostleton@lemmy.dbzer0.com said, that's how every Bluetooth device works, but I'm also curious what purpose connecting a mug to a phone via Bluetooth serves.

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  • [–] 3 points 6 months ago

    It's to monitor battery life and adjust temperature, you can usually do both via physical interaction with the warmer, but they offer an app that may display more info or allow more precise control over the temp. Usually the app is completely optional.

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  • No idea, maybe that's where you see the battery level? I like to imagine the coffee mugs are just chatting amongst themselves.

    "Ugh Peggy with her fucking black coffee again, we make it through 15 minutes of work and we'll be back in here so we can refill .... Same shit every morning".

    "You're telling me, Clyde's been milking his coffee break for 45 minutes now, I doubt he even remembers telling Terry we were going to send him that paperwork"

    🤣 1
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  • [–] 5 points 6 months ago (5 children)

    Imagine being afraid of a Bluetooth device behaving like every other Bluetooth device ever created.

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  • [–] 9 points 6 months ago* (4 children)

    Except that it sounds like this hooked into an app and sent all the info about those Bluetooth devices to the manufacturer, which some data collectors can use process of elimination to isolate you. Normal (privacy-respecting) Bluetooth devices do not pass this info to the service provider and only your phone uses it to pair with the device.

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  • [–] 1 point 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (3 children)

    Sounds more like the app presented a standard request for location access, which is required for scanning nearby devices to be able to find and pair the mug with an app.

    E: For the paranoid:

    https://developer.android.com/develop/connectivity/bluetooth/bt-permissions

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  • [–] 4 points 6 months ago* (2 children)

    You are correct that this is normal for the OS. The OS will use this data to determine your location. What is not normal is abusing the Bluetooth permission to send a list of scanned devices to app vendor. They should only be collecting the location, not the raw Bluetooth list. I don’t know what the app is to confirm, but the way they said it, they would be handing all of the local device data along with the standard location permission. This is the extra data that can be used to isolate you more than just a location could.

    This is similar to browser fingerprinting, but worse because your phone goes with you everywhere.

    One final mention is that the app is likely not collecting that list once, but rather regularly, so they could build a profile on what devices you’re in range of and by extension where you are regularly, even if you chose to disable your location, since they’re using Bluetooth MAC addresses as their workaround.

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  • [–] 5 points 6 months ago

    What's the worst that can happen? China takes over and I'm forced to slave my life away and not be able to get anything I want?..... oh wait..

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  • [–] 8 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

    Oooh new vocab, thanks.

    精神分裂症

    Jīngshéng fēnliè zhèng

    Schizophrenia

    精神 - mind/mental state

    分裂 - split/divided

    症 - illness

    謝謝(不,我沒有精神分裂症)

    Xièxiè (bù, wŏ mĕi yòu jīngshéng fēnliè zhèng)

    Thanks (no, I don't have schizophrenia)

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  • How do they have reams of data on every American? I'm not following.

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  • [–] 3 points 6 months ago

    Is that why this stainless steel French press needs wifi to work?

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  • [–] 2 points 6 months ago

    手た経消す屋根多雨

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  • [–] 2 points 6 months ago

    They flipped my mom!?

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  • [–] 6 points 6 months ago

    The US also has reams of data on every American. The difference is America is using to control, capture, and kill people.

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  • [–] 4 points 6 months ago

    I don't give a rats ass if chinas tracking me. Why? because I don't live in china nor do I ever plan to. In fact, I'd prefer they track me instead of a US company

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  • [–] 3 points 6 months ago (1 child)

    what exactly is the concern with China knowing when I make my coffee or use my laundry machine? It's not like they're interested in stealing my identity or scamming me out of my savings. Outside of the generally icky-ness of having your data stolen, what's the endgame?

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  • [–] 15 points 6 months ago

    Silly Answer: American morning rituals are sacred. They are to be hidden from our enemies.

    Actual Answer:

    Small Data sources compiled over time with rough geographic approximation (or direct geographic information such as GPS sensors on phones) as well as likely consumer information can actually form a complete or near complete profile on the habits and locations of individuals, groups, and companies, including military targets. As an example, if we assume all Chinese companies are secretly government controlled (they're not.) extensions of their spy agency then, for example, a useful profile might include:

    Time the alarm clock went off + time water heater gets activated + time coffee maker is set to make coffee + time refrigerator is opened and closed + time recorded by alarm system + video from doorbell cam = Accurate morning routine, including when the house will be empty, when it will be occupied but not actively monitored (during a morning shower), if and when the person might be gone for a run and how long

    If you need to target say, a general who you believe has classified information in his home office, then it would be amazing to know all of this. It'd also be easier to just bribe the maid to get what you want (which is how 99% of 'spying' operations actually work.)

    If you extend that to all things that might form some amount of data on their use, you could get a total profile of everything someone does in a day in their home... or office... or possibly military base.

    Now is this is a risk? Yes.

    Is this a likely risk? No. Not even a little. Again bribing a maid or maintenance technician is cheaper, easier, and way, way less risky.

    Then why do so many Chinese appliances send this information to unknown and scary ip addresses?

    Because data is valuable to advertisers, and theoretically it's valuable to engineers to know how their product is being used. This combined with executives' push for everything to have an app, because data is valuable and because it makes the product seem 'modern,' fully offers a simple explanation on how and why we find ourselves here. But sinophobia in the Amerisraeli Empire is the only way the Epstein class actually maintains any control -- if there is an enemy who they accuse of doing even worse, the subjects of the empire let them do anything they way.

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