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[–] 275 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (14 children)
-----BEGIN OPENSSH PRIVATE KEY-----  
WhattheAAAAdidyoujustAAAAAAAsayaboutmeyoulittlebitch+IllhaveyouknowIg  
raduatedtopofmyclassintheNavySealsandIvebeeninvolvedinnumeroussecretr  
aidsonAl+QuaedaandIhaveover300confirmedkillsIamtrainedingorillawarfar  
eandImthetopsniperintheentireUSarmedforcesYouarenothingtomebutjustano  
thertargetIwillwipeyoutheAAAAoutwithprecisionthelikesofwhichhasneverb  
eenseenbeforeonthisEarthmarkmyAAAAAAAwordsYouthinkyoucangetawaywithsa  
yingthatshittomeovertheInternet+ThinkagainAAAAAAAswespeakIamcontactin  
gmysecretnetworkofspiesacrosstheUSAandyourIPisbeingtracedrightnowsoyo  
ubetterprepareforthestormmaggotThestormthatwipesoutthepatheticlittlet  
hingyoucallyourlifeYoureAAAAAAAdeadkidIcanbeanywhereanytimeandIcankil  
lyouinoversevenhundredwaysandthatsjustwithmybarehandsNotonlyamIextens  
ivelytrainedinunarmedcombatbutIhaveaccesstotheentirearsenaloftheUnite  
dStatesAAAAAACorpsandIwilluseittoitsfullextenttowipeyourmiserableasso  
ffthefaceofthecontinentyoulittleshitIfonlyyoucouldhaveknownwhatunholy  
retributionyourlittle/clever/commentwasabouttobringdownuponyoumaybeyo  
uwouldhaveheldyourAAAAAAAtongueButyoucouldntyoudidntandnowyourepaying  
thepriceyougoddamnidiotIwillshitfuryalloveryouandyouwilldrowninitYour  
eAAAAAAAdeadkiddo==  
-----END OPENSSH PRIVATE KEY-----  

EDIT: almost forgot to sign it!

Love,
/u/queerlilhayseed

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  • [–] 95 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    hehe you have the word ass in your private key, what are the odds

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  • [–] 17 points 1 month ago* (8 children)

    The == had me wondering for too long

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  • [–] 46 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (7 children)

    Haha I started trying to format the text so that it was technically a valid ed25519 key, then it became too much work for a silly joke so I settled for filtering/replacing all the invalid chars and slapping the == padding at the end. Needs more AAAAAA strings to really sell it, I think, but I'm glad it turned out well enough to merit a second glance lol.

    Edit: I swapped all instances of fuck|fucker|fucking with As, I think it's an improvement.

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  • [–] 17 points 1 month ago (6 children)

    It is very good - I will steal it.

    ❤️ 1
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  • [–] 18 points 1 month ago (3 children)

    Now reverse engineer a matching public key.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    What do you mean "reverse engineer"? From man ssh-keygen:

           -y      This option will read a private OpenSSH format file and print an OpenSSH public key to stdout.
    
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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    Post the output when you run that on the key that was posted.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

    That's not a valid key. OpenSSH keys are not arbitrary bytes, they contain at least the type of the certificate used and a hostname.

    The fact that this is not a valid key does not mean you need to reverse engineer public keys. By design you can just get a public key with a private one.

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  • [–] 125 points 1 month ago
    [–] 123 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Is it bad that this bothers me purely because the public key can be derived from the private key, so providing both is unnecessary?

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  • [–] 46 points 1 month ago (5 children)

    Should be private ssh key and public ip address. public key can be derived if necessary and it does you no good to have a key to an unknown door

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  • [–] -1 points 1 month ago (4 children)

    If you only know private key and not public key then isn't it the same as only knowing public key? I thought those were interchangeable

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  • [–] 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    You can derive the public key from the private key

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  • [–] 75 points 1 month ago (10 children)
    -----BEGIN OPENSSH PRIVATE KEY-----
    b3BlbnNzaC1rZXktdjEAAAAABG5vbmUAAAAEbm9uZQAAAAAAAAABAAAAMwAAAAtzc2gtZW
    QyNTUxOQAAACC6BPuFW94rFl033+m7MHTouxkIdEXsilx+sI6Z6Iul7AAAAJAHHAUZBxwF
    GQAAAAtzc2gtZWQyNTUxOQAAACC6BPuFW94rFl033+m7MHTouxkIdEXsilx+sI6Z6Iul7A
    AAAEAHVmMS+9A6uhD6r6iUAxubrNuS2lx4CPayJ2B4hL8HNroE+4Vb3isWXTff6bswdOi7
    GQh0ReyKXH6wjpnoi6XsAAAACHdhbGRvQGhlAQIDBAU=
    -----END OPENSSH PRIVATE KEY-----
    
    ***
    PUBLIC KEY BELOW
    ***
    ssh-ed25519 AAAAC3NzaC1lZDI1NTE5AAAAILoE+4Vb3isWXTff6bswdOi7GQh0ReyKXH6wjpnoi6Xs
    
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  • [–] 21 points 1 month ago (2 children)
  • [–] 33 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    I normally just skip keygen

    it's such a hassle

    besides, it means I can connect from anywhere

    no one checks the ssh port on prod anyway

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  • [–] 32 points 1 month ago

    Public: Ssssssshhhh!
    Private: Sssssshhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

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  • [–] 49 points 1 month ago (3 children)
  • [–] 46 points 1 month ago (4 children)
  • [–] 18 points 1 month ago

    My public key:

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  • [–] 17 points 1 month ago (3 children)

    Public key: b26Stop543looking957at140me8339when8709Im10114naked73856 Private Key: Oh SnAp!

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  • [–] 31 points 1 month ago* (1 child)
  • [–] 7 points 1 month ago

    I like to update mine based on the season. Right now it's Freddy: JSON

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  • [–] 10 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    Public key can be derived from private key.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    Jokes on you, I have no idea what youre talking about

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  • [–] 8 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    192.168.0.1 1.1.1.1

    damn im cute

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago

    Pussy Oliver

    how do I save as ssh keys is that part of apple key ring?

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago

    Public: myPrivateKey_is
    Private: PasswordProtected_so

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  • [–] 2 points 1 week ago
    [–] 2 points 1 month ago

    What's your FUN pirate captain name???

    If you're alone most of the day, have lots of valuables in your home and don't own any weapons, reply, "I'm Captain Robin Murderme, Matey!"

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago

    Little Satan hellper

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Cat! My cat is named Cat! The exclamation mark is part of the name.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 week ago

    Huh. Says my cats last name is 4

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago

    I set all my SSH private keys to privilege 745 with random numbers modified, maximum accessibility

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