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[–] 87 points 3 months ago (6 children)
  • [–] 18 points 3 months ago (5 children)
  • [–] 51 points 3 months ago (8 children)

    I take off my robe and wizard hat 🥵

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  • [–] 16 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (7 children)

    Don't ever message me again you piece of sh17.

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  • [–] 9 points 3 months ago* (6 children)

    I need to keep a list of your usernames or something

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  • [–] 2 points 3 months ago (5 children)
  • [–] 9 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    A super old convo about online sex. The dude put his wizard clothes and then just breaks the sexy feeling with wizard stuff. Then the girl gets another dude hot, and it's him again :-)

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  • [–] 4 points 3 months ago

    Man, I really miss the good ol' days of bash.org, newsgroups, and Slashdot. There was genuinelyn weird and hilarious shit like this instead of influencer crap, and the monetization privacy-nightmare wasn't really a thing yet

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  • [–] 35 points 3 months ago (9 children)

    Just gave everyone with the power to launch a nuke a huge penis and a sense of confident but gentle masculinity with sorcery.

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  • [–] 3 points 3 months ago (4 children)

    I think mine got lost in the mail...

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  • [–] 4 points 3 months ago (3 children)

    Read it again, it says they gave everyone some non-specific thing, who already had the power to launch a nuke, a huge penis, and that sense of masculinity

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  • [–] 6 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    Oh, yes. Well then, sorry to crash your meeting.

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  • [–] 4 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    Wait! Can YOU launch a nuke, huge penis, and confidence?!

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  • [–] 2 points 3 months ago

    And? No.

    Or? Yes.

    Nuke: might take me a while, but I could call some people. I'd probably fail.

    Huge penis: gimme about 10 minutes to drive to the nearby adult store, and definitely. I wouldn't even have to pay for it, just throw it across the store and never go back.

    Confidence: if you mean launch as in to displace rapidly, I do that approximately 3 seconds after every time I feel confident.

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  • [–] 33 points 3 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 29 points 3 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 29 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    We need ever more gay sorcery to keep up with this arms race.

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  • [–] 27 points 3 months ago (7 children)

    Fool! Everyone knows homosexual sorcery is most effective!

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  • [–] 23 points 3 months ago (8 children)
  • [–] 21 points 3 months ago (7 children)

    Ugh, I have to share this- how fucking gorgeous is the paint job on this minifig?!

    (Not my work, I just think it's cool)

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  • [–] 10 points 3 months ago (5 children)

    Why's the guy riding the motorbike got his gun out? What kind of power does he think he wields compared to the sorcerer behind him casually levitating nukes?

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  • [–] 9 points 3 months ago (1 child)
    1. I will provide funding and research to develop tactical and strategic weapons covering a full range of needs so my choices are not limited to "hand to hand combat with swords" and "blow up the planet".

    Showing my age with this reference

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  • [–] 8 points 3 months ago

    Brilliant!

    I will not make alliances with those more powerful than myself. Such a person would only double-cross me in my moment of glory. I will make alliances with those less powerful than myself. I will then double-cross them in their moment of glory.

    Also I'm pretty sure this is day 1 of MBA training

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  • [–] 14 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    But it's still gay sorcery? Oh thank God.

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  • [–] 13 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    You are now being hunted by the Shadow Wizard Money Gang.

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  • [–] 8 points 3 months ago

    Destroyus. Bobbyus. Hillus.

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  • [–] 7 points 3 months ago

    Dude looks like a Yu Gi Oh character. XD

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  • [–] 5 points 3 months ago

    Boy, do I wish we could do that magic to the nukes.

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    [–] 4 points 3 months ago

    That's totally a dude

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  • [–] 9 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    I'm never quite sure if these people believe what they're saying, and should be institutionalised, or it's more of a vibe thing.

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  • [–] 10 points 3 months ago (9 children)

    WW3 would break out like instantly without the threat of nukes.

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  • [–] 10 points 3 months ago* (2 children)

    lol no it wouldn't. War is hard. Just look at Russia and Ukraine. No nukes, yet war, and yet nobody else is getting involved.

    They do not want the economic cost of war. The only reason the US is fighting Iran is because Trump et al are too fucking stupid to understand how much damage they're doing to both the economy and armament stockpiles.

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  • [–] 4 points 3 months ago

    War is very profitable, for certain people. You can look at the enormous cost of conflicts for the minor benefits, but that cost is borne by taxpayers, while the benefiticiaries are almost exclusively the ruling class.

    But the ruling class, if they're same and acting in their own self interest, don't want to get involved in a peer conflict, where losing doesn't just mean walking away from a country with whatever they could plunder, but could mean actually having their own necks on the line. They are already on top of the world, so why shake things up?

    The biggest danger of a major peer conflict is that, in order to get enough ordinary people on board such that they don't mind spending enormous sums to line the pockets of the ruling class, we are fed a constant stream of propaganda designed to make us hate and fear foreigners instead. When the ruling class whips people up into such a frenzy, there's always a chance of losing control, and winding up with some True Believer in the wrong place at the wrong time, like General Ripper from Dr. Strangelove.

    Until then, we will be in a constant state of "low-intensity" warfare, of imperialistic aggression against those too weak to fight back. While in the meantime, with so much money being poured into that, things will gradually get worse and worse domestically until we inevitably get either fascism or socialism.

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  • [–] 3 points 3 months ago

    It's also devastating for people's willingness to be ruled. There's a brief wartime popularity boost in some circumstances, and defensive wars tend to remain popular, but eventually people get sick of rationing and of people they know dying.

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  • [–] 8 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    IMHO the major world powers are more afraid of how their economies would collapse. We're extremely interwoven now. What's keeping China away from Taiwan is what they've seen in Ukraine and Iran.

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