I did a stupid and want to say thanks to the NHS who patched me up. Ask me about the stupid, it's pretty stupid.

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[–] 163 points 3 months ago (17 children)
  • [–] 103 points 3 months ago (16 children)
  • [–] [S] 101 points 3 months ago (15 children)
  • [–] 72 points 3 months ago (14 children)
  • [–] 70 points 3 months ago (13 children)
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  • [–] 40 points 3 months ago (11 children)
  • [–] 39 points 3 months ago* (10 children)
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  • [–] 32 points 3 months ago (8 children)

    Everyone I know, goes away in the end.

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  • [–] 29 points 3 months ago (7 children)
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  • [–] 9 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    SpoilerI normally hate crass jokes like this, but this was genuinely unexpected and perfectly placed. Johnny Cash had already sung "I will make you squirt" in my head before I even know what was happening. Bravo.

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  • [–] 101 points 3 months ago (5 children)

    And you could have it all,

    My empire of dirt.

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  • [–] 9 points 3 months ago (4 children)

    Or was it an empire of shit?

    We need to know if you wanted Jesus or heroin.

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  • [–] 10 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    It was dirt. In all versions. The "shit" change was elsewhere in the song.

    Original:

    I wear this crown of shit

    Abomination:

    I wear this crown of thorns

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  • [–] 56 points 3 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 44 points 3 months ago (18 children)

    What did you do to get the injury?

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  • [–] [S] 67 points 3 months ago (17 children)

    So...you know how sometimes vehicles sound a bit rough, and you think " I'll look at YouTube" and youtube says maybe it the wheel bearing, and you jack it up and spin the wheel and listen and see if it is the wheel bearing? What youtube (and common sense) doesn't say is don't put your finger in the rim to spin it, because there's a caliper there. Trust, you do not want your finger in between a wheel and a caliper when you are trying to spin the drive wheel as hard as you can.

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  • [–] 30 points 3 months ago (4 children)
  • [–] [S] 25 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    ...ly fucking stupid. I am stunned at my own idiocy.

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  • [–] 6 points 3 months ago

    You'd be surprised at how many intelligent people do incredibly stupid things.

    I bet you won't stick your finger in there again. As long as you've learned that lesson, I wouldn't be hard on yourself if I were you.

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  • [–] 9 points 3 months ago (4 children)

    Your finger good tho right? If you go knuckle first it's usually losing skin and a learning lesson. I don't talk about the other way

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  • [–] [S] 21 points 3 months ago (3 children)

    Yep, might be a bit wonky. Thought about leaving it, cover with a bandage and hope for the best, but went to hospital just in case. Glad I did, open fracture and stitches required. Nurses and doctors were great, glad I did.

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  • [–] 6 points 3 months ago

    Yikes!

    Two recent finger injuries to make you feel better!

    I sliced my thumb open vertically with a pocket knife trying to cut a zip tie off of something. My thumb looked like a snakes tongue, and now I have a scar that makes my thumb look like a dick head.

    Same thumb, just post healing, I was helping a friend move, grabbed a bicycle by the wheel to put it on top of the truck. Wheel spun, bike frame spun the opposite direction, the spoke cut into my thumb, and had my buddy not reacted quickly (or if he had simply grabbed the bike and pulled instead of just stabilizing it), I likely would have lost the thumb entirely. Broke the bone, spoke cut all the way to the bone. It suuuuuucked.

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  • [–] 4 points 3 months ago

    In the future rather then spin it grab the tyre and wobble it.

    If it's got movement it's shagged.

    Just don't pull it off what ever you have it jacked up on.

    The real benefit is if you're wheel bearing is really rooted you can tell on the ground.

    Spinning can tell you about cv shafts though because they tend to click.

    Source am mechanic

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  • [–] 4 points 3 months ago

    My partner calls me a cat because I can catch flies. Good reaction time, hand-eye coordination, likely from being a former hockey goalie in uni. If I drop something, I can often manage to catch it with the same hand I dropped it from, which is usually pretty neat.

    Not so long ago I was drying a sharp kitchen knife.

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  • [–] 29 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    I hurt myself today

    to see if I still feel.

    I focus on the pain

    the only thing that's real...

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  • [–] 28 points 3 months ago

    I hurt myself today

    To see if you still feel?

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  • [–] 25 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    Did the needle tear a hole?

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  • [–] 25 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (3 children)

    Stop posting here, you should focus on the pain.

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  • [–] 18 points 3 months ago

    to see if you still feel the pain ? right

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  • [–] 18 points 3 months ago (4 children)

    Same

    I did mine two days ago, took a chunk of finger tip out while cutting a loaf of bread on a cutting board which was not on a non-slip surface. People talk about how nice sourdough is, but never how dangerous. Worth it.

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  • [–] 4 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    Those annoying crocheted cloths that Aunt Terri keeps sending the family? They go under the cutting board. For safety.

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  • [–] 2 points 3 months ago

    Yes indeed, a tea towel will do the job well, I just got some silicone mats to make the whole surface black (so I can see dirt and crumbs easier) and non-slip. It also does some sound absorption to reduce the noise level, but it isn't a huge effect.

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  • [–] 2 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    Oh no!! Were you able to save the sourdough??

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  • [–] 7 points 3 months ago

    The sourdough was unscathed, which was the problem, it deflected the knife better than my weak human flesh. Attempt 2 was successful, the sourdough was great, and it is a standard loaf which replaces all other bread so it became Vegemite toast, tuna salad sandwiches, boiled egg mashed with butter toast, and a vessel for butter with sausages. It is also gluten free, made with brown and white rice, buckwheat, and tapioca starch. Finally got sourdough working with gluten free flour, no xantham gum needed, just a touch of psylium husk (2g/500g).

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  • [–] 10 points 3 months ago

    you prolly shouldnt do that. it can be painful.

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  • [–] 5 points 3 months ago

    Oh no, brother! Hope it heals quickly.

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  • [–] 4 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    Take 2 aspirins and 750ml of good brandy and mail me $75. And we will both be happy!

    Get well good sir!

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  • [–] 3 points 3 months ago* (1 child)

    Don’t listen to him! You just put the lime in the coconut and drink them both up. It is off label but it’ll still work. The cost is only a dime and a lime and… I think another coconut you pay for the lime? Is that how it goes? So you need 20 cents to buy 2 coconuts and trade one for a lime?

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  • [–] 3 points 3 months ago

    I cut off the tip of my thumb as a child. I hope your finger gets better soon!

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  • [–] 3 points 3 months ago

    If it makes you feel smarter the other day I ran a drill bit into the gap between my finger and finger nail 🥲

    I'm not the smartest lmao. Don't drill into objects with your finger behind the spot you're drilling into to support the material (in my defense it was a thin flexible marierial in a weird shape that was hard to support and I guess I thought my finger was out of the way enough and/or I could move it as the drill started to go though... I'm an idiot lol)

    Sending wishes for speedy recovery my friend!

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  • [–] 2 points 3 months ago

    4? Ah, it'll grow back buddy! No worries.

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