Who here is incognito?

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[–] 55 points 1 year ago (1 child)
  • [–] 29 points 1 year ago (3 children)

    I've often been told I'm too nOrMaL to be autistic but never that I don't look autistic. Have you all been told the latter? I see so many memes about that.

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  • [–] 7 points 1 year ago

    Normie here. Those two phrases can mean the same thing. There's a lot of body language processing and behavior processing that all gets lumped into someones "look", if they say "you're too normal" it means the same thing as "you don't look autistic".

    You could probably get nitty gritty and find that someone who is more familiar with you might be more likely to say "you're too normal" because they are basing it off of more than just appearances, but in the long run it's all just based on observations anyway and certain cultures might lean toward one phrase over the other.

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    [–] 27 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    When your 'thing' is technology (computers/coding/hosting/fixing electronics) they tend not to label you as much as ask you for help with their tech.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    Yeah I was trying to figure out what exactly to say here but I really wanted to reply…..

    My first thought was something like I’m not autistic but posts like this make me wonder if I’m just not diagnosed.

    However I’ll stick with your response. I’m clearly neurotypical because my thing is technology

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  • [–] 4 points 1 year ago

    I'm not diagnosed either, But I've got all the flavors of socially awkward and wild unbridled obsession that make me a reasonably decent fit. It took me decades to work out social anxiety sufficiently to hang out with people in public. I'm still not particularly good at it, but if I try really hard, I can tell if others are uncomfortable or bored, and on rare occasion I can even shut the fuck up after they ask me something that touches on one of my obsessions.

    The way I look at it, I've known people who are rather normal and tech obsessed. They know the features of the latest cell phone, They build beautiful gaming rigs from scratch and build themselves a website, maybe even stand up a Plex server.

    But they don't know what all the pins on the ATX power connector do, or know why there's so much trouble getting Linux to access the cellular modems in the phones, or the minutia of h264 versus h265, or if ever tried it to hand code a QR code.

    I could probably be doing a lot more social or environmentally positive with my life. But I like what I like, and I've managed to raise a family. It's just not a train garden in my basement It's a 42U rack.

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  • [–] 20 points 1 year ago (8 children)

    I'm not necessarily autistic, but when I tell people I'm neurodivergent, they're like "yup" 😓

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  • [+] 12 points 1 year ago (7 children)
  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    For me it's that I always want to walk on an even number of tiles, planks, or other pieces of flooring with clear and repeating edges.

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  • [–] 20 points 1 year ago (9 children)

    Me I guess? I mean even I didnt know I was on the spectrum until I was 36.

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  • [–] 7 points 1 year ago* (7 children)

    Beat 48 😉

    (it's not a competition though, just having fun.)

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  • [–] 10 points 1 year ago (6 children)

    60! Just now talking the time to figure out what it all means.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago (5 children)

    Nice and congrats!

    May I ask on which country? I'm currently trying to get diagnosed in Germany and its really impossible so far.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    I'm in the US. Not a formal diagnosis, but tested on embrace autism, and a few other sites. I'm the multiple retakes I get very close to the same results. I've talked with my wife (surprising to her the many things I do and things that she had no idea about) and son, and I've talked with a counselor (going regularly now). For me, I don't see the value of a neuro psych eval.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago (1 child)

    Thanks!

    I always thought I was different and struggling in waves so to say without being able to pinpoint the issue - but I excel at analyzing things.

    The cliche held me from considering autism, which is different now and explains everything left over or a few contradictions. Wishing you the best!

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    I didn't consider that I am on the spectrum until my son and then wife told me I could be. That started my investigation. I also don't have obvious outward characteristics, but I've been hiding it since I was in 3rd grade. Lots of things on my head and concealed.

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  • [–] 19 points 1 year ago (4 children)

    I don't know how well received 'Love on the Spectrum' is in the community but I have to say it was mesmerizing when the one lady was on a date with the DJ guy and they we listing off song after song and the key it was in.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    I couldnt watch it because i recognised my own mannerisms so much from that one blonde girl. I couldnt get through it realizing that i'm probably more visually neurodivergent than i thought and it cringed me out LOL (nothing against it, just felt too much like watching myself on tape haha)

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    [–] 18 points 1 year ago (5 children)

    I mask a lot better when I'm not depressed. (I'm horribly depressed.)

    That said I still mask as second nature pretty well as I consistently get the "I wouldn't have guessed you were autistic." response from people a lot. I generally love socializing and I'm pretty good at it from experience and the topic of "people" being an on and off special interest.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago (4 children)

    I hope you’re doing better, pal.

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  • [–] 0 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    I hope they're doing whatever makes the world more interesting, regardless of how it makes them feel.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago (1 child)
  • Sorry for being honest? If they're suffering i hope it's at least novel and exciting. If they're doing well i hope it's in a way that enables them to make the world cooler.

    I dont know this person. They could be a terrible piece of shit or the physical personification of all values i hold dear. Maybe I'd wish them well! Maybe I'd hope they fall in one and die. But i know i don't want whatever happens to be boring.

    Sorry for not lying. I'll be less honest in the future.

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  • [–] 18 points 1 year ago

    They specifically say train not model of train so I can only assume it is literally every individual train.

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  • [–] 17 points 1 year ago

    I! AM! A SURGEON!

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  • [–] 16 points 1 year ago (6 children)

    I hate the train meme for its accuracy... I dispise trains but I ended up working on the railway anyway.

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  • [–] 10 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    Who hates trains!? Before you worked on the railway, I mean.

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  • [–] 14 points 1 year ago*

    Growing up in the 80s made me ridiculously good at masking.

    Which is to my detriment now that more resources are available. Unmasking in front of neurotypicals is quite difficult for me.

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  • [–] 13 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    My favourite response to this when is:

    "Oh yeah? So what does autism look like? Go on, do your best impression. I want to see."

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  • [–] 7 points 1 year ago

    I have a neuromild friend who, when I am on a rant because the world works the wrong way, or explaining something in detail that the milds probably don't care about, very politely holds up a little sign for me.

    It's like, "Hey friend, this is a 'tism."

    They've never stopped me, never cut me off, never sighed in exasperation that the autistic guy is at it again. Just a little note that whatever I'm on about is neurospicier than the milds generally like.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago

    Only from a distance. Ok I wear a big floppy hat so even from a distance!

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  • [–] 7 points 1 year ago

    Ha. Joke’s on you, everything I do is an autism. Plus I’m a lady. Checkmate redpillers.

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  • [–] 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    In the post about the new convert your colleagues to your faith in the breakroom memo by the Trump regime, I offered an example of what my spiritual workmates might encounter if they raised the topic of Jesus, several paragraphs about the cosmic horror of reality.

    The main thrust is that all spirit, whether another subatomic factor, or a manifold like gravity, is transparent to to the standard model of particle physics. It's also transparent to relativity, but we expect that.

    And that includes human souls, ghosts, afterlife.

    My point was I've thought about and researched existential philosophy at length, possibly to suggest I'm ASD (disclosure: I'm diagnosed), and my evangelical rivals may as well be walking into the Total Perspective Vortex.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

    I compiled a list of 4000 color names and their rgb values.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    When 32-bit color depth came out, a magazine reported a request by a non-computer person to create a list of all the colors. Just all of them. The response was something like

    00 00 00 Black
    00 00 01 Still black
    00 00 02 Nope, still black
    00 00 03 More black
    ...

    So a list of 4000 colors, named, might actually be useful at least to give someone a scope of color depth.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago* (1 child)

    I have the kind of AuDHD which almost completely disappears with the right dose of alcohodderall. In fact I can be downright witty and gregarious when that equilibrium kicks in just right, so the true awkwardness is reserved for those who exist in those unfortunate, but necessary windows of sobriety.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    My wittiness just comes out as almost like a tic. Usually a sharp one-liner barb that presents itself in conversation. It's very circumstantial, and often mean. Alcohol basically takes the sharpness and meanness out, and spreads the humor out more evenly. So I'm not silent for 20 minutes and throw in a hardcore jab, I'm just far more sociable, and generally likeable.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 year ago

    I know it's a joke but this literally is my brother. Not always easy to deal with but he is super awesome in all his own ways

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  • [+] -32 points 1 year ago (31 children)
  • [–] 30 points 1 year ago*

    A large portion scientists, doctors, engineers, staticians and mathematicians are on the spectrum.

    Eradicate autism and you eradicate many of our more intelligent members of society.

    Autism is a side of the coin in human genetics, not a disease. It is a gift of our diversity that not all of us think the same way or conform. It gives us an evolutionary advantage even if it makes you seem at a disadvantage due to the rigid, cookie cutter expectations of the modern world. Autism has always been part of us, it just didn't become a "problem" until billionaires needed wage slaves that were efficient little drones who fell in line.

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  • [–] 14 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    You are not broken. The world around you is fundamentally broken for everyone except for the richest of people. You just have the disadvantage of being able to clearly see how broken it is.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    Look, some people have bad experience, some good. Let's listen to both. No reason to tell anyone their experience is not real/true/authentic.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago

    My apologies. I didn't intend to invalidate anyone's experience. I wanted to provide an alternative explanation for the same experience.

    I've had some pretty bad days (and some bad years). Looking at everything through the lens of "the world isn't made for me" instead of "I'm broken" has helped me to cope, and has inspired me to search for new opportunities.

    As you said, everyone's experience is valid.
    Not every day will be good, and having a new viewpoint doesn't stop the pain. I do hope, however, that my viewpoint can help to provide comfort and guidance to someone.

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  • [–] 28 points 1 year ago (4 children)

    Or maybe we can just improve society a little bit, rather than advocate for eugenics. For once.

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  • [+] -14 points 1 year ago (3 children)
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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago (10 children)

    Notice how diversity is a positive in literally every other species?

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  • [–] 0 points 1 year ago (4 children)

    No, but I do see how literally every other species has some pretty harshly enforced, if you know what I mean, ways that 'weak' members of said species doesn't pass on their genes.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago (2 children)
  • [+] -4 points 1 year ago (2 children)
  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago

    diversity in cowmilk output (lol) in cows for a farmer isnt something desirable, atleast one area i know something about.

    Surely you've noticed that this only applies to a population that is being exploited as a resource and prioritizes a specific trait or traits that are desirable to the exploiter rather than traits that contribute to the organism's well-being. That's what eugenics is, and what you are advocating for. It is not better for humanity or even for the individual to eradicate autism, it is better for our exploiters.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    you sound exactly like a rabidly ableist neurotypical when you hate yourself for being autistic

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  • [+] -5 points 1 year ago (1 child)
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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    I know you are getting down voted, but I get it and have had similar thoughts. Do I think there is actually anything wrong with me? No, I don't actually have any issue with myself as a person. Nor do I think there is anything wrong with "neurotypical" people. That doesn't mean I'm not fundamentally incompatible with society as a whole without having to constantly use a complex set of mental algorithms developed over decades that allows me to function within it well enough to fulfill my basic needs and wants.

    In an ideal world people would be understanding and accepting of me and anyone else that is "different". That's not the reality though. People are OK with different as long as it isn't too different. In order for me and people like me to function in the world with the same ease and understanding that everyone else does would require educating and acclimatizing them to be understanding of differences from the youngest ages. In a fucked up way I think using gene editing to make sure no one has to experience the pain of my past (and sometimes still present) is more feasible than seismically shifting the attitude of society as whole.

    As I said before, I don't have an issue with myself, I just don't think anyone should have to experience what I have experienced. I'm even one of the lucky ones that is high functioning and doing well for themselves in all aspects aside from socially. This shouldn't be the solution, but if it means people don't have to suffer I have a hard time being completely opposed.

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