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[–] 223 points 1 month ago (24 children)

He literally used video game kiting strats to pull him away from the bike so he had enough time to sprint to it and mount it.

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  • [–] 76 points 1 month ago (18 children)

    Hate to break it to you, but kiting was a thing before video games.

    But yes that is also where I learned the concept.

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  • [–] 68 points 1 month ago (8 children)

    So this post got me curious to the etymology of the term. And from what I've been able to discern, the term seems to in fact originate from gaming.

    I mean, obviously the tactic pre-dates recorded history. But 'kiting', in regards to the term itself, doesn't seem to be a thing before video games.

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  • [–] 30 points 1 month ago* (5 children)

    It's funny because we seem to retroactively assign the term to ancient military tactics. I doubt they called it kiting. They'd probably call it ÖRGÛLŸK, and every Mongolian worth their salt would know how to perform flawless ÖRGÛLŸK.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    Yeah i wasnt trying to say that word kiting was old, but for sure the action is old. Im there are predator animals that do it with poison or exhausting their prey before going in for the kill.

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  • [+] -11 points 1 month ago (7 children)

    ...lol I'm trying to decide if you're informing me that kites predate video games, but also I find it hard to believe that you didn't know what a kite was until you played video games.

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  • [–] 23 points 1 month ago (6 children)

    Kiting, a verb, not kite a noun. Kiting is the acting of moving away from an enemy while they chase you.

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  • [–] 19 points 1 month ago (4 children)

    I looked up the etymology on "kite", and it's quite interesting. Apparently, its original use was to describe a hawk whose call sounds kind of like "kite". Then it was used more generally to describe all birds in that family.

    The kite toy was named after the bird, because the bird tended to try to sit on some wind while hunting, so it was basically hovering like a toy kite.

    The action of leading an enemy around is named after the toy kite, because a kite in flight is always the length of the string away from the person flying the kite. So, like if you tried to run from the kite, it would always be the same distance away chasing you. You're leading the kite around on a string. And so you would kite an enemy in the same sense.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 month ago* (3 children)

    So wait....I was joking, but you're literally saying that "kiting" before video games is just from actual kites. Lol like no shit, why did I get downvoted?

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Because the term is from video games, meaning to lead an enemy around as if they were a kite that you are holding. Nobody is saying kites are older. And yes, you can say "let's go kiting" and mean playing with toy kites in a field, but that is not the definition of the word that is being discussed here. The guy kited the cop in the way that your marine would kite a zergling, not the way a kid would fly a kite at the park.

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  • [+] -6 points 1 month ago (3 children)

    Haha still got pepper sprayed twice for it

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  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Well, he had pepper sprayed in his general direction. Given the lack of reaction, I'd say it missed.

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  • [–] 209 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    See this is proof that police have to use lethal Force because they're so fucking lazy and worthless they can't even jog without almost dying

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  • [–] 95 points 1 month ago (6 children)

    The cop runs like when I try to run in my dreams

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  • [–] 8 points 1 month ago (4 children)

    You have just made me realise that I am an incompetent runner in my dreams. Like I'm trying to run through jelly. Not saying I'm a good runner by any means, but not as bad as I am in my dreams.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 month ago (3 children)
  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    I once told somebody about a recurring dream I have where I can’t control the speed of my car. Apparently your brain is fully aware that your legs aren’t responding to commands and it translates into your dreams.

    In your case, not being able to run because your sleep cycle is deliberately paralysing your legs

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago

    I used to have dreams where driving was very difficult because the pedals would be positioned awkwardly close. It pretty much defied spatial geometry because it wasn't like there was space behind them for my legs, they were just really close with the wall right behind them but it was only hard to access and manipulate the pedals; I still somehow fit fine into that position.

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  • [–] 95 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    He really wanted that bike back

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  • [–] 94 points 1 month ago

    Bro kited that cop away from his bike like it was an MMO, absolutely marvelous talent.

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  • [–] 76 points 1 month ago (5 children)

    This is a good example of why all y'all should be working out! When the revolution happens, you need to be at least so fit.

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  • [–] 9 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    I agree except for one thing. should a revolution even happen, people will be fighting for their lives.

    neither of these men were fighting as if their lives depended upon the outcome.

    nothing motivates better than the real threat of death.

    still, get fit and you only increase your chances of survival.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago

    I don't think we as individuals have a choice anymore, it is being made for us as we speak. Everything is getting much more expensive and wages are remaining flat. There's a lot of hungry people, and a quick death is preferable to starving.

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  • [–] 70 points 1 month ago*

    yakety sax music intensifies

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  • [–] 64 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    Looked like GTA except the cops didn't immediately open fire.

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  • [–] 50 points 1 month ago

    Look, we've gotten to the point where without backstory and evidence, police in the United States don't deserve the benefit of the doubt, so until I find out otherwise, I'm not even remotely disappointed that the guy defeated the police officer.

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  • [–] 49 points 1 month ago (5 children)

    At least he didn't get shot

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  • [–] 17 points 1 month ago (3 children)

    Looks like the cop was trying to pepper spray him while he was fleeing.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago (2 children)
  • [–] 44 points 1 month ago (5 children)

    Cop is running like he just ran a marathon in waist high snow.

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  • [–] 11 points 1 month ago (4 children)

    Cop is running like Frankenstein's mind was teleported into his body mid-stride.

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  • [–] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    The Frankenstein trope did the creature dirty. Both Dr. and creation were basically geniuses. The creature in particular taught itself how to speak and iirc read/write all by discretely observing some peasants, and how to cook by just experimenting with raw ingredients + fire. If the Dr. that made it actually nurtured and trained the thing, the pair would have been unstoppable. But, that's the whole spiel of the story - he got cold feet, treated his creation like shit, and that came back to bite him in the ass again and again.

    If you can tolerate the oldish English, the Mary Shelley's original story still holds its own - definitely recommended, if for no other reason than to appreciate how Frankenstein in media since then has missed the mark fucking hard.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 month ago

    Agreed!

    Once you get into the "groove” of the language (and Frankenstein is a good place to start) it's worth it to check out some of the other novels Mary Shelley wrote. Like The Last Man for example.

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  • [–] 40 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Didn't shoot him because he's white?

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  • [–] 37 points 1 month ago

    He escaped by jogging lightly! Great job, Officer Stumbly!

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  • [–] 27 points 1 month ago

    Thanks for taking the time to share a direct watch video instead of linking to YouTube. Most shared content still points to YouTube (for valid reasons but still).

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  • [–] 27 points 1 month ago

    Unfortunately when this cop retires, he'll likely be replaced by someone trigger happy

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  • [–] 20 points 1 month ago

    Well at least the cop didn’t shoot him.

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  • [–] 34 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    YES!

    Whether he was actually guilty is besides the point, you gotta respect the game.

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  • [–] 12 points 1 month ago

    I used to only assume defendants were innocent during jury duty. Now I assume the police are usually on the side of evil. They've never investigated any crimes I've reported and only ever given people I see a hard time. Less than worthless.

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  • [–] 15 points 1 month ago
    [–] 26 points 1 month ago

    Now you see why they shoot in the back. Fat fucks can't keep up.

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  • [–] 11 points 1 month ago

    Good on that police officer for not using deadly force.

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  • [–] 10 points 1 month ago
    [–] 9 points 1 month ago (10 children)

    Isnt this why they supposed to have a partner?

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  • [–] 13 points 1 month ago (7 children)

    A lot of police departments moved away from two person patrols years ago. You’d have to look up the specific reasons but my guess is cost reduction.

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  • [–] 18 points 1 month ago (6 children)

    Yet they have the money for military vehicles strange.

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  • [–] 15 points 1 month ago (4 children)

    A lot of those are surplus and likely given to departments or sold for very little. That practice has contributed a lot to the militarization of police in America.

    That should all be taken away from them though. Most of their guns too. A country as developed as the US shouldn’t require an armed para military force to police its citizens and, arguably, the US doesn’t require one.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    The thing is they're still a high financial drain. The military doesn't give them the ones that are in good enough condition to still be useful, and they're a maintenance nightmare.

    I worked for a city that accepted one, and it broke down while transporting it to the city the day we took possession and ended up costing the city 200 grand on its first day.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago

    A country as developed as the US shouldn’t require an armed para military force to police its citizens and, arguably, the US doesn’t require one.

    ...we need an armed paramilitary force to police our politicians. I mean, on paper we have one, but in practice they seem to just follow a domestic enemy's orders with no thought at all so long as that enemy is holding an office like POTUS.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 month ago

    Fuck the police

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  • [–] 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Found the only good cop. Too slow to catch you but still doesn't shoot.

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  • [–] 7 points 1 month ago

    In the country where I live, cops retire when they get old.

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  • [–] 13 points 1 month ago

    As the kids say, "absolute cinema".

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  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago

    This is hilarious!

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  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago

    wow, exactly how one would run away from a cop in a computer game; run so that he follows you then once far enough run back and get your bike

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  • [–] 4 points 1 month ago

    One for the good guys.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago

    I thought he was going to get in the police car and drive off GTA style for a second

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago

    The bike guy seems to have watched Zombieland.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago
    [–] 4 points 1 month ago

    Go sit at the pec deck for another 30 minutes you fat fuck.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    That was almost over. He was way too winded to escape that taser shot when he did. But glad it ended happily

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