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[–] 114 points 5 months ago (6 children)

we are living the Idiocracy prequel

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  • [–] 48 points 5 months ago (5 children)
  • [–] 23 points 5 months ago (4 children)

    Kash Patel can’t not ever look like he just got pulled over while high.

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  • [–] 7 points 5 months ago (3 children)

    Like he trusted the wrong fart!

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  • [–] 84 points 5 months ago

    What a fucking disgrace. The exact type of spectacle you'd expect from the magats. Obsessed with being alpha while simultaneously the biggest fucking losers you've ever seen.

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  • [–] 158 points 5 months ago (13 children)

    No worse than LBJ’s demolition derby arena or Carter’s Tractor-Pull-a-Palooza, except for the fact that those are totally made up and never occurred because why the hell would they ever have???

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  • [–] 57 points 5 months ago (3 children)

    I went to Jimmy Carter's Tactor-Pull-a-Palooza and all I got was this stupid shirt.

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  • [–] 20 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    To be honest, neither of those sound nearly as tacky or gauche as this does to me, something about it being UFC/MMA or if it were boxing during it's peak or even pro wrestling make it this gross mix of gladiatorial combat, organized crime, and carny shit that really shouldn't be anywhere near the President. Its not wrong to enjoy any of those as entertainment even if someone is currently the President, hell I love pro wrestling when there good storylines and characters, I'm not what you would normally call a classy person. But this gives me a very particular 'ick' and I'm not quite sure how to describe it.

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  • [–] 2 points 5 months ago

    I can't believe UFC is still a thing. I stopped watching when every fight was a title bout. And here we have interim intermingled heavy weight title bout. It was all meaningless at that point who has the title. And they want every fight to be a title bout cause it sells more ppv.

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  • [–] 16 points 5 months ago (5 children)

    LBJ didn’t have to resort to tough guy tropes and ritualized masculinity displays to convince people he had the biggest dick in the room.

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  • [–] 18 points 5 months ago* (3 children)

    I mean he literally whipped it out in front of journalists and diplomats as a ritualistic display. Let’s not gloss over the shitty aspects of former presidents just to compare them to this president full of shitty aspects.

    https://people.com/lyndon-b-johnson-nsfw-president-11830816

    Things I learned from Red White and Royal Blue.

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  • [–] 5 points 5 months ago

    I don’t disagree with you in any way, however, I would pay more money than I’m willing to admit to watch a literal presidential dick measuring contest. I think we all know who would likely place last, but even if he didn’t, I would enjoy his reaction to losing for the rest of my days with great relish because he couldn’t possibly be first and that’s he would care about.

    And I’m pretty much only able to confidently hope this because we all know that apparently LBJ had a hog, and I appreciates that about him, even though yeah fuck him for the war crimes.

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  • [–] 76 points 5 months ago (5 children)
  • [–] 9 points 5 months ago (3 children)

    Seinfeld is the worst part of Seinfeld. I always thought he was so annoying and was just constantly complaining. Like dude shut up and suck it up. Also, body positivity is a good thing, so yeah go stand on the wrong side of history, Jerry.

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  • [–] 37 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    I had to check three times - this is not The Onion. This is real, and humor is dead.

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  • [–] 33 points 5 months ago

    He is such an embarrassment

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  • [–] 32 points 5 months ago (3 children)

    So we need to build a billion dollar ballroom so the president can be safe during events, but also, fuck it, just put up a temporary structure and invite 5000 people to watch a ufc fight on the lawn?

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  • [–] 20 points 5 months ago (2 children)

    They should call this "ow, my balls".

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  • [–] 2 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    Gotta bring out the Dildozer!

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  • [–] 5 points 5 months ago

    Ha.

    I could see a whole lot of redcaps unironically cheering on the spectacle of some heel that has been constructed for them (like Biden) - having to drive around in a tiny car with a rock in it and a dildo strapped on the front just before they get stomped by the Dildozer or the Ass Blaster or the Ass Dozer.

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  • [–] 25 points 5 months ago

    I actually thought this was an onion article at first glance, what the fuck

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  • [–] 25 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    Ten bucks says there will be some kind of "assassination attempt" that will happen at this event.

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  • [–] 23 points 5 months ago

    So embarrassing...

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  • [–] 22 points 5 months ago

    I hate this timeline so fucking much.

    This skidmark is such an embarrassment to the world and to the country.

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  • [+] 21 points 5 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 21 points 5 months ago
    [–] 15 points 5 months ago (4 children)

    I really wish that time travel existed just so we could see the reactions of the founding fathers to what US politics have become

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  • [–] 16 points 5 months ago* (1 child)

    Washington: "However [political parties] may now and then answer popular ends, they are likely in the course of time and things, to become potent engines, by which cunning, ambitious, and unprincipled men will be enabled to subvert the power of the people and to usurp for themselves the reins of government, destroying afterwards the very engines which have lifted them to unjust dominion."

    I assume he'd say "I warned you."

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  • [–] 15 points 5 months ago

    With every day that passes we lean harder into Idiocracy.

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  • [–] 29 points 5 months ago

    Clown country

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  • [–] 14 points 5 months ago

    You can't make this stuff up. They originally wanted the fight on July 4th, but for unknown logistical reasons it had to be moved to Trumps birthday.

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  • [–] 13 points 5 months ago (2 children)

    Idiocracy moving briskly apace

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  • [–] 8 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 child)

    Idiocracy is one of the most unrealistic portrails of the US executive branch (the house of representin is spot on) President Dwayne Elezondo MtnDew Herbert Camacho is actually the best fictional president. He had a problem,

    • found the most qualified person to solve it.

    • listened to them (reluctantly) then.

    • didnt take much credit for it, once it was solved

    No other president would have done any of those things... Perhaps Carter.

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  • [–] 13 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    This reminds me of that scene in Django Unchained, where the rich white plantation owner makes poor people fight each other to death for entertainment

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  • [–] 13 points 5 months ago
    [–] 10 points 5 months ago

    Who would have thought that the big birthday party of the most powerful nation on earth would be reduced to something like this. They threw a good national birthday party back in 1976.

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  • [–] 10 points 5 months ago

    sheer stupidity

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  • [–] 16 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    What an unbecoming thing of the office of the president

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  • [–] 8 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    Maybe we can put exotic dancers in the East Room and swap out the Resolute Desk for a baccarat table

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  • [–] 8 points 5 months ago

    This motherfucker....

    Let's see his DUMB ass try and get into the ring without soiling himself or falling over

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  • [–] 7 points 5 months ago

    Jesus fucking Christ

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  • [–] 6 points 5 months ago (2 children)

    Can't decide if UFC is more cringe than a WWE event would be.

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  • [–] 6 points 5 months ago

    I saw this before and genuinly thought it was a meme or image manipulation, lol

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  • [–] 5 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    We need to rise up as a nation and take this fucker down

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  • [–] 4 points 5 months ago (9 children)

    I wonder about the streaming rights to this. Will this be publicly broadcast?

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  • [–] 1 point 5 months ago (5 children)

    Of course. UFC is more a TV show than anything else.

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  • [–] 2 points 5 months ago (4 children)

    Nah, it'll be pay-per-view with at least half going directly to Trump

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  • [–] -1 points 5 months ago (3 children)

    Which is a broadcast to the public

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  • [–] 2 points 5 months ago* (2 children)

    That's not broadcast to the public. That would be broadcast to a select few that paid for the rights to view it. Public broadcast television is exactly that, publicly broadcast to everyone for free.

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  • [–] 4 points 5 months ago

    Stay classy, Washington.

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  • [–] 7 points 5 months ago

    Now I understand why Tim Heidecker retired his character Tim Heidecker.

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  • [–] 3 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    I used to watch UFC but the whole mAGA thing killed it for me. That and they have hardly any stars left, its just the same guys fighting eachother over and over.

    This whole thing is absurd, I'm done for good now.

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  • [–] 2 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)
    [+] 2 points 5 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 2 points 5 months ago

    At press time, workers were seen replacing several White House historical plaques with illuminated advertisements for testosterone supplements and commemorative “Executive Branch Tapout” foam fingers.

    lol, thank you.

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  • [–] 1 point 5 months ago

    Is Trump going in the fighting ring?

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  • [–] 1 point 5 months ago

    Romans had the collisuem and the gladiators i guess Trump has to cheap out to entertain the masses

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  • [–] 1 point 5 months ago

    Elect a reality tv star as president get a reality tv presidency.

    (That being said, he’s not leaving)

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  • [–] 0 points 5 months ago

    I don't understand all the confusion and/or guffawing.

    Bloodsport is the most apropos way to celebrate the founding of America.

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