When I was young, I was naive to the ways of romance, and especially romantic communication. I was often oblivious to advances made upon me, and awkward and unskilled at making any expression of interest without just looking a bit foolish. However, after a lot of experience and many ups and downs in the pursuit of love, I find that I am no longer young.

For real tho, what is the name of that doc?

Also. Is Melissa single?

Would also love to know the doc, lol.

If someone is actively engaged with something, you have to break their attention. I feel like people need to learn more about dissociation and blacksmithing.

be more interesting than medieval sword making.

no, sex isn't the answer. probably reading a book on medieval history and telling him about it is.

it always baffles me how many women i have dated... have no interests or passions, and seem to look down on people who do.

and the women i have dated who did have passions and interests... were way way more attractive and more fun to spend time with, because they didn't expect me to entertain them.

"Men are disgusting! They only think about one thing sex medieval sword making!" /s

Sometimes a man is just tired, you know?

Have you tried laying next to your boyfriend while making a sword?

Bit of a tangent and a big YES I am a giant fucking nerd - but I do text based roleplaying. People online don't know my actual gender (chick) since I'll play anything. One huge thing I noticed when playing a dude is a lot of the women would just kinda be there and try to be sexy hoping I would do something.

They didn't all write like that, and I still had a few guys to starfished, so to speak, but goddamn YOU NEED TO ENGAGE ME. If I wanted something pretty, I would look at a painting. I need an activity.

It sounds like hes respecting consent, just being in your underwear doesn't automatically mean you want him all over you and hes respecting that possibility.

If I was playing a video game that I was super sucked into and focused on, and then a girl I was with still in her underwear sat next to me, I wouldn't assume it was an invitation to immediately begin sucking on her titties or something. I'd figure she just wanted to chill next to me in her undies.

If you want to have sex: communicate that. He probably would have been down.

Well, if it was Reclaiming the Blade, I'm not surprised !

Your sword is no match for me!

Hmm. A “hey” with three Ys and a smirk... I don’t think Melissa’s bf is the problem.

Time to lose the lingerie and put on a smiths apron

"I have presented my flesh in his presence and that wasn't automatically rewarded. What am I doing wrong?"

Have you tried... talking about shared interests? Being funny? Being charming and confident? Putting effort into romance? Like all the same advice that help men gain interest from women works the other way around too, you know? We're all human.

Have you tried talking to each other?

I’m sure men pay attention to her. Just not the men she wants, how she wants.

Be interested, just a little bit, in what they're interested in. Like, you don't have to enjoy it, but show interest and they'll respond a lot more than if you make that a problem they have to choose over.

I mean I might put down the doc simply because I can come back to it anytime, while the moment won't. But what would spark things more is if she asks me something simple about what had my focus.

And this goes both ways. Paying attention to what your SO likes in any amount works so much better than making it something bad.