all 30 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] 45 points 7 months ago

Stop giving me a choice!

  • source
  • [–] 45 points 7 months ago (9 children)

    My wife complains about this to me. But in my defense, I only ask if I don't really want to go myself. "Let's go to the court house together" vs "you can come if you want". I don't want to subject her to the same shit I'd rather not be doing.

  • source
  • hideshow 9 child comments
  • [–] 36 points 7 months ago (8 children)

    I've found myself in similar situations with past partners. I've found that "I need to go to x place. I'd love to have your company if you're not busy" is a good way to let them know that I want them there with me, but there's no obligation if they don't want to come.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 8 child comments
  • [–] 11 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    Thanks! I'll start using this, I'm surprised it's such a common thing, I tought I was just socially inept or something

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • [–] 9 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    see to me that sounds like guilting them into coming.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • [–] 30 points 7 months ago (4 children)

    I just don't want to pressure someone into doing something if they don't want to though...

  • source
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [–] 16 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    You aren't. They're adults and will decline if they want.

    I got a lot more confidence in myself as soon as I realized that my lack of confidence implied that everyone else were children in need of my protection, from me. Treat your adult friends like adults. They'll be ok.

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 3 child comments
  • [–] 17 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    Both are fine depending on the context.

  • source
  • hideshow 1 child comment
  • [–] 11 points 7 months ago* (2 children)

    I’m going to go do _______. Would you like to come?

  • source
  • hideshow 2 child comments
  • [–] 10 points 7 months ago (7 children)

    That's why I love the fact our langaige has dual. You can just use the fual form of imperative and it's immediately obvious you want the person to come even if you are in a group of people.

    It takes 1 word

  • source
  • hideshow 7 child comments
  • [–] 26 points 7 months ago (6 children)
  • [–] 4 points 7 months ago (4 children)

    That can be misunderstood depending on context

  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 4 child comments
  • [–] 7 points 7 months ago

    Oh, I’m not UNinvited, yay.

  • source