I wouldn't. I need my partner to have a minimun conversational skill. In a couple, there's more beyond sex, there is talk, there is communication. I'd rather a worse looking person that's smart than a 10 with whom I can't even talk about anything interesting.

I think it would depend on whether they're just stupid or willfully ignorant. Personality counts for a lot imo.

Being smart or dumb is not an all connected to having a good personality.

Also your story about Vietnam does not mean she is dumb. It means she is ill informed.

That’s certainly a naive thing to say, but intelligence presents itself in different ways. She may not know about geography or history, but maybe there are other topics she’s more informed about?

I’d also say how young she is should be considered. Someone in their early 20’s not aware Vietnam exists? Embarsssing for sure but certainly more understandable than someone in their 40’s. In my personal opinion, someone being open to learning and growth is way more important than where they’re starting.

TLDR; definitely a cause for concern but I wouldn’t say it’s a deal breaker in and of itself. Get to know her better before deciding if you can be with her.

Depends on how they're dumb. Your example is just amusing and pretty innocent - that doesn't bother me at all. What would bug me is if it's something that's clearly screwing up their life. Like if they can't hold down a job or get through basic everyday tasks without constantly fucking it up.

For me, intelligence isn't about what you know - it's about how you think. Can she grasp that Vietnam is an actual country once you explain it to her? If yes, then she's not dumb - she's just ignorant or uneducated. I can live with that. Especially with a 10/10 personality.

Date ? Sure.

Marry ? Prolly not.

If looks is 10, personality is 10 and smarts is 1 it's still a 7 average score which is pretty good.

Just have to look out for dangerous combinations with dumb. A stubborn risk taker for example.

Depends. If she's from certain places, the ignorance kinda comes with the territory. But if she's willing to learn and is aware of her ignorance, that's a different thing.

To me, I couldn't date someone dumb. I find intellectual stimulation sexy though. But I'd rather date an idiot with a good personality than someone smart who yelled at wait staff for example.

There's dumb and unwilling to learn, and there's dumb and willing to learn. BIGGGG diff. If you then said no, its a country, and they said "oh I did not know that how silly, I never thought about it!" Thats fine. If they then go off like the lady who named her child Malaysia and then ranted that her child is not a country because there is no country named Malaysia, run.

Are you sure she wasn't joking?

Like that would be an excellent deadpan response if the other person knew they were playing stupid.

Did that. It was hell. She wasn't pretty, she just looked that way.

Yeah. Personality is big for me. There's a big difference in unintelligent and unknowledgable; most people are intelligent enough, just lacking knowledge or information.

Dumb can be helped. Most people tend to be "dumb" in the sense of lexical knowledge or lacking the understanding of logic, not the ability. Which means they CAN learn to become smarter, even if they require help and appropriate education (something the generic education system can't provide).

Perfect example are the three "worst students" in my high school class. They were troublemakers, because they didn't find the classes engaging, because they didn't understand them - all because they didn't understand the basics, as it wasn't taught to them in a way they could process it. I tutored them for a few months and every. single. teacher. No, I'm not joking, literally every single teacher made comments on their sudden improvements, often even testing them separately, not believing that students who just barely passed for 2-3 years suddenly were getting 80-90% on their tests.

So yeah, a lack of lexical knowledge is not a major issue for me. I'd definitely date someone who's attractive but dumb, because the latter can be "fixed".

What's more important in my opinion is their general attitude, approach to life. Are they kind? Are they a good person? How do they treat others - let that be friends, strangers, animals, waitstaff/service workers, etc.?

Dumb can be fixed, but an awful personality most often can't.

Flings but no relationships. Part of why I love my wife is how smart she is. I like intellectual stuff and much prefer partners who can keep up with me on it

Though as others have said, if she's kind and open minded that's different from dumb imo. I have bad memory, and I've respected people who are a bit slow, it's a refusal to learn or think that I can't handle

I wouldn't, I have broken up with girls over this. But that didn't mean we couldn't have some fun.

Not knowing something does not mean one is dumb, refusing to learn about it would be a safer indicator. How did she react when you explained her Vietnam was still a country and has been so for quite some time?

Also, wtop worrying her being 10/10 (or 0/10) or being the reincarnation of Einstein or... not Einstein, maybe? Was she an interesting person, you had a great time with, or not? That would be the only reason to date/not date someone, in my book... But I'm old and I don't date.

I am not really answering your question, but I had this crush on a girl because she was 10/10 on looks and also seemingly innocent as a young kid. In the end, she was really immature on intelligence and emotionally. I wouldn't date someone like her again.

I say I am not answering your question because you only provide an example of a fact she didn't know. My answer is more general, this kind of thing you saw on her is something that the person I am describing could have done, easily. To me, personally, taking the whole bigger picture, with more examples like yours, plus some context, and given my previous experience, this is a red flag and make me just walk away from them...

So, to answer your question, give it a few more tries. Look how do they react when corrected (if they laugh then is quite cool and fun moment.) but if they feel "insulted" then there's lack of emotional maturity too... that's my red flag.

There is a difference between ignorance and stupidity. The first can cured, while the second tends to be permanent.

Does she have any curiosity? I have a friend who grew up on a farm and had parents who didn’t value education. When i met her she didn’t seem to know a lot of things most adults do. She’s 40 now with 2 degrees (she started university when she was 30). some ignorant people seem dumb, but sometimes it’s just a reflection of their opportunities. if she has no curiosity, though, she might be dumb.

That depends. Being kind, compassionate, and open to learning are more important than anything else. “Dumb” is something that can be solved because it’s merely a lack of knowledge, which can be through no fault of their own. But if someone refuses to learn or grow, that’s not just being “dumb,” it’s being stubborn and toxic, which are signs that someone is naturally evil.

How could someone that dumb have a 10/10 personality?

The Vietnam bit is funny to me because I actually knew a girl that was also incredibly attractive, but believed firmly that the Vietnam war never happened lol

Oh, god no. There was this girl I knew years and years ago who wasn't even a 10/10. She was cute, but wasn't even under consideration when I found out how dumb she was.

We were friendly, but I'd have to stop the conversation to define what I thought were basic vocabulary words.

Words like "consideration" and "vocabulary".

An ability (and willingness) to learn and grow is high on the list of requirements

What is "intelligence"? For your example I would have more problems with the potential nationalism not knowing Vietnam exists which would be a personality problem.

It can work for some people long term if they truly accept the person as they are and don't get frustrated by them.

But often there will come a point, after the honeymoon has worn off, and after you've had sex too many times to count, where you suddenly realize that you're not actually ever having conversations, you're explaining stuff you found interesting to them, and getting nothing back. It can also get more frustrating depending on personality. If they're always flying off the handle about stuff on social media and you have to explain why it's not true, it will wear on you. If you always have to be the one to do everything, either because she doesn't know how, or because you don't trust her to do it right, then it will wear on you.

Personally that's why I stress the idea of a partnership so much now. I want an equal partner who does everything I can do (or at least, most of it).

That being said, dating a 10/10 for a while and having a lot of incredible sex is also not an opportunity to necessarily turn down, especially depending on your age. If you're young, go for it, have some fun, learn some lessons, have a lot of amazing sex, but get out early. If you're older, then consider whether or not you can really be around that person, day in, day out, forever. If not bail now.

Personality and character matter more than any particular type of intelligence.

That said, I would probably end up treating them poorly, not realizing how condescending my responses to those moments are.

Btw, how did you like vietnam? I spent a few months there.

That depends on your priorities I guess. As long as we have compatible ideals and treat others similarly, then I’d give it a shot. I don’t necessarily want a partner who knows history or geography, just one that’s a good person I get along with and one that shares interests with me.

On a side note, I’d personally refrain from calling anyone dumb. Schools aren’t perfect and this person has lived a whole life just like you. They have learned things, just not the same things. If they’re a 10/10, I imagine they probably know a lot about health, fitness, fashion, and maybe makeup. Those are all valid and useful things to know.

Some people are dumb, some lack education, some are ignorant and maybe there are more variations. You can learn till you drop dead, so lack of education would not instantly make me run. Stupidity is a harder nut, I need someone to talk to. I'm not sure if I could handle that.

Ignorance I can't accept.

Well without going into detail about how there are different types of intelligence and how that is not the same as being wise(knowledgeable) the answer is absolutely not. Simply because that would bring many relationship problems and I would not be attracted to that person in the first place.

https://youtu.be/UQv7Tr8HbGE

Also, you've given an example of ignorance, not stupidity. Stupidity is the desire to cling to ignorance, a refusal to learn.

I'd give her a chance, maybe she just REALLY isn't into geography. (Although, that is pretty dumb)

If she constantly misunderstood everything I said, it wouldn't work out for very long, but if she was just lacking exposure and was interested and learned new information as it was presented, I think we could get along just fine.

If she has 10/10 personality, I would marry her given that the "dumbness" does not make her impaired

No. Its more nuanced than this for sure. But intelligence is a massive part of personality. If someone is dumb, they are certainly not a 10 out of 10 in personality.

I think the better question is why a woman with movie star charm would put up with someone who thought she was an idiot.

Seems like the relationship is doomed from the start if providing a simple response to an easy question antagonizes you.