Damn that sucks, all y'all unemployed?

I open my laptop and answer about six emails.

Um...my job?

I would just ask my brother to give me $40. I think he would probably do that to avoid exploding.

Sit on my ass. Maybe play a video game.

Fuckers.

I could suck one dick and have $60 to get my family dinner after their ordeal.

Sell my shirt to my dad for $40. I’m pretty sure he’d rather buy my shirt than explode.

40 dollars? That's all? I'm salaried and can work any hours I want to, so I guess I'm logging in at work and writing a few lines of code or answering some emails.

Twenty minutes will do it. Probably round it up to half an hour just to be safe. And honestly, if I get into the zone, an hour will fly by, easy.

Go to work for an hour

Take my bottles to the depot

Ask a buddy to spot me 40

Sell a couple things

… check my bank account?

$40 isn’t that much money…

Explain the situation to my family and sell them stuff.

Start suckin and fuckin 🫡

Good old-fashioned robbery. Then when charged argue a defense of necessity.

To make such a defense, you have to show that the harm you sought to avoid exceeds the harmed caused by the crime you admit to performing. Robbing $40 from a random store obviously meets this threshold if the alternative is multiple people dying.

There are many cases where you can't argue a defense of necessity. For example, if someone threatens to kill your family unless you kill some other person, you can't argue a defense of necessity at your murder trial. You can't sacrifice one life to save another. But if the crime you commit is obviously orders of magnitude less destructive than the alternative? Then yes, simply robbing a store for $40 to prevent multiple deaths could easily be argued as a necessity.

Hell, even if you're not able to make that defense; it's 40 bucks. What are the odds I'll face anything other than probation for such a minor crime?

It's the obvious answer, but sometimes the simplest answers are best. If I simply have to make 40 dollars within the next 3 hours, or people die? Yeah I'm just straight-up robbing somewhere.

Just pick up a shift at work.

I ask my best friend for $40.

Depends how you define "make"

If standard pay from job is too late, then I'd sell a CSP or CC from my brokerage account and I technically "made" the premium

If that's not urgent enough, take some jewelry to a pawn shop and hock it

I make that in an hour of work. So... keep doing what I'm doing?

Donating plasma only takes about an hour

Ask my friends to transfer money real quick.

So $13.33/h?

That's less than £10 which I believe would be below minimum wage in my country, so basically any job would do it

Go to a cash dispenser

Can't I just take $40 out of my wallet?

I scroll on my phone for a bit and call it a day.

Hop on the Uber hamster wheel again. And again. And again.

Work one hour at my job.

Before or after tax?

Make exactly $39

How exactly do you define making money though? I already have more than $40 could I purchase a product worth more than $40 and then return it? Could I steal $40 from somebody and then give it back once my family is no longer going to explode? Could I explain that my family is going to explode and politely request the money in hopes that someone believes me? How long do I need to retain the money? What if I just take something I own to a pawn shop? What if I gamble and I lose $50 and then later I make $40, I'm $10 down but technically I made $40 in the last transaction, have I satisfied the requirement?

sell tickets to an explosive event. then just keep the money.

am I already scheduled for a shift? I make that hourly.

Sell my car to the next person who walks by, I guess.

But I'll hint to them (family) strongly that I won't be selling two cars, so they need to get less explodey.

I work one hour and jerk off for the remaining two.

Rob a mcdonalds, only take $40. Explain myself after and pay it back.

I feel like this is a "straight" boys wet dream. Perfect 'no homo' excuse to suck a dick.

"I did it to save my family".

Tell my family they have a new problem to deal with.

Maybe walk down to the pier and play a guitar with an open case. I could probably get more than $40 from scrap copper. I could maybe talk a used car lot into letting me clear some headlights for twice that much. Hawking some expensive junk on Craig's list might also work. Pawn some tools.

sell a joke to my family for $40.

Clock in at work. 34 minutes later I earn $40.

Easy. Sell a gun on FB Marketplace for a ridiculously low asking price. It would sell faster than I would be banned.

Grab all the canned stuff I made at home, and either just ask my mother to buy all them for 40 (a family member can pay me, right?) or convince the family friend who loves the candied jalapeños to buy them.

Run to the neighbours and try to sell some DVDs

Sell Pokemon stupid cheap

Get a loan from the local loan shark.

Go to the roulette table at the casino. Bet it all on 32.

Lose my bet.

Go back to the local loan shark for $40.

Bet the $40 at the roulette table.

Lose.

Repeat until either I get the money to pay the loan shark and save my family. Or I gues it's RIP for my family and my kneecaps.

I would go to work at my job and earn more than $40 just like I do every day.

Define family first

• • Parents - nothing
• • Siblings - nothing
• • Uncle's/aunts - nothing
• • Cousins - nothing
• • Grandparents - Uber
• • GFs - Uber

Sell some stocks I guess.

Unless you mean my net worth has to go up $40? In which case, I'll probably look for someone who would be willing to pay me $40 ahead of time to teach them some machine learning over some negotiable span of time. Or to build a website or something. There are lots of businesses in the area that could use it, and $40 is insanely cheap for something like that.

Get laid, make money. I just need one.

That's possible at most jobs here, so family is safe. If you mean outside of work, I'm a lady so could probably find & turn a trick in that amount of time, sure husband would even set it up rather than exploding, he has a friend who works with rich guys. Could make that with plenty to spare, I'd guess.