"Here come the test results: 'You are a horrible person'. That's what it says, 'a horrible person'. We weren't even testing for that!"

Anything Glados from Portal 1/2--still one of very, very few games to actually make me laugh. But also the Cave Johnson "when life gives you lemons" rant comes to mind, because it's both funny and poignant.

"Well, This is the part where he kills us."

"Hello. This is the part where I kill you."

CHAPTER 9: THE PART WHERE HE KILLS YOU

Achievement Unlocked: The part where he kills you

"The right person in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world" - Half Life 2

The creepy gait of his voice gives me goosebumps every time.

War... war never changes.

Lots of good bioshock quotes, but the standout:

We all make choices, but in the end our choices make us

This was a triumph
I'm making a note here, "Huge success"
It's hard to overstate my satisfaction
Aperture Science
We do what we must because we can
For the good of all of us, except the ones who are dead

Had to be me. Someone else might have gotten it wrong.

You must construct additional pylons.

Words to live by.

You forget a thousand things every day, make sure this is one of them.

Michael, GTA V

Wololo.

Truth is, the game was rigged from the start. -Benny

Alternatively:

Hope this interaction does not lead to any fallout between us. Fallout: New Vegas. -Benny

It's a-me, Mario!

From Assassin's Creed 2. Might be known from some other game too, I dunno.

All your base are belong to us.

I bought FC3 without knowing what the game was because of this monologue:

Vaas: "Did I ever tell you what the definition of insanity is?

Insanity is doing the exact same fucking thing, over and over again expecting shit to change. That. Is. Crazy.

The first time somebody told me that, I dunno, I thought they were bullshitting me, so, boom, I shot him. The thing is, he was right

And then I started seeing, everywhere I looked, everywhere I looked all these fucking pricks. Everywhere I looked, doing the exact same fucking thing... over and over and over and over again thinking: 'This time is gonna be different.' No, no, no please... 'This time is gonna be different.'

I'm sorry, I don't like... The way... you are looking at me,. Okay!? Do you have a fucking problem in your head, do you think I am bullshitting you, do you think I am lying? Fuck you! Okay? Fuck you!

It's okay, man. I'm gonna chill, hermano. I'm gonna chill -

The thing is... Alright, the thing is I killed you once already. And it's not like I am fucking crazy. It's okay... It's like water under the bridge

Did I ever tell you the definition... of insanity?

Had to be me, someone else might've gotten it wrong.

"(while looking into the mirror) Despite everything, it's still you.", from Undertale.

Also a bunch of lines from the Happy Happy cult members in Earthbound.

0.000% of Communism has been built. Evil child-murdering billionaires still rule the world with a shit-eating grin. All he has managed to do is make himself sad. He is starting to suspect Kras Mazov fucked him over personally with his socio-economic theory. It has, however, made him into a very, very smart boy with something like a university degree in Truth. Instead of building Communism, he now builds a precise model of this grotesque, duplicitous world.

"The thing about happiness is that you only know you had it when it's gone. I mean, you may think to yourself that you're happy. But you don't really believe it. You focus on the petty bullshit, or the next job, or whatever. It's only looking back by comparison with what comes after that you really understand, that's what happiness felt like."

-Conrad Kellogg; Fallout 4.

Ah shit here we go again.

"What kind of idiot are you?"

"I dunno. The good kind?"

Bulletstorm.

The truth, Walker, is that you're here because you wanted to feel like something you're not: a hero.

Go hang a salami, I'm a palindrome

Protocol 3: Protect the Pilot

One of the best campaigns I have ever played and definetly my favourite shooter.

Statement: I see you have purchased me, master. I find this a satisfactory arrangement. Am I to accompany you now? Shall I kill something for you?

HK-47 from Knights Of The Old Republic is probably my favorite source of quotes: https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Wookieepedia:Quote_of_the_Day/Archive/HK-47

• I was most proud to have partaken in the political system of the galaxy. During the time [the senator] possessed me, he gained significant rank. Given enough time, I believe he could have become chancellor. I even eliminated a few key opponents that he did not ask for. Freebies, if you will.
• Query: Would you rather be caught with contraband that is very illegal or just a little illegal?
• Droids tend to blend into the background, like a bench or a card table. Mockery: Droid, fetch this. Droid, translate that. Droid, clean out the trash compactor. Part of the love of my function comes when the ‘furnishings’ pull out tibanna-powered rifles and point them at the owners' heads.
• Observation: I am a droid, master, with programming. Even if I did not enjoy killing, I would have no choice. Thankfully, I enjoy it very much.

All your base are belong to us.

"Everyone thinks they're the hero of their own story" - Handsome Jack

Generally the last episode of Tales from the Borderlands is fucking awesome when it comes to Handsome Jack quotes.

"GET OVER HERE!"

"Snake? Snake? Snaaaaaaaaaaaaake!"

All your base are belong to us.

"Dear humanity: We regret being alien bastards. We regret coming to Earth. And we most definitely regret that the Corps just blew up our raggedy-ass fleet!" - Avery Johnson

What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets.

"Damn, I look GOOD" Duke Nukem.

Go for the eyes Boo, go for the eyes!

"I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow in the knee"

Since so many other quotes are already claimed, how about some Outer Wilds:

Seriously, I tried everything I could think of [...], and neither idea worked.

GET UP ON THE HYDRA'S BACK

Shaun!

I'll share some of my favourites from SMAC (1999), the undisputed, undefeated and overall best 4X game!

Pravin Lal:

• "As the Americans learned so painfully in Earth's final century, free flow of information is the only safeguard against tyranny. The once-chained people whose leaders at last lose their grip on information flow will soon burst with freedom and vitality, but the free nation gradually constricting its grip on public discourse has begun its rapid slide into despotism. Beware of he who would deny you access to information, for in his heart he dreams himself your master."

Sister Miriam:

• "The Morgans fear what may not be purchased, for a trader cannot comprehend a thing that is priceless."
• "Some would ask: 'how could a perfect God create a universe with so much that is evil?' They have missed a greater conundrum: why would a perfect God create a universe at all?"
• "The righteous need not cower before the drumbeat of human progress. Though the song of yesterday fades into the challenge of tomorrow, God still watches and judges us. Evil lurks in the datalinks as it lurked in the streets of yesterday. But it was never the streets that were evil."

Chairman Yang:

• "Learn to overcome the crass demands of flesh and bone, for they warp the matrix through which we perceive the world. Extend your awareness outward, beyond the self of body, to embrace the self of group and the self of humanity. The goals of the group and the greater race are transcendent, and to embrace them is to achieve enlightenment."

Lady Deirdre:

• "Eternity lies ahead of us, and behind. Have you drunk your fill?"

Goodbye, then. Be safe, friend. Don't you dare go Hollow.

"You're on a path in the woods."