My hygienist: Do you floss daily?

Me: I try, but there are times I forget to.

My hygienist: how often do you forget?

Me: well if I knew I was forgetting, I'd just floss

I’m the opposite. Can’t stand the feeling of stuff in my teeth. I floss after every meal if I have it on me, which usually I do, and then once more before bed. My teeth are spaced widely enough that a stray shred of chicken can get between a couple teeth and feel like a boulder until I get it out.

But the result is that my dentist never doubts me when I say I floss.

Crap, I have a dentist appointment tomorrow morning. Can I cram for it? What if I stay up all night flossing?

Edit: Yall, I nailed it. Did so good they wanna see me back again sooner.

The trick is to floss for a couple of weeks before your appointment. One week in a pinch. They might still be able to tell from the plaque buildup that you don't usually floss, but if you also eat almost no sugar like me, that's largely mitigated.

• sincerely, someone who always flosses 3x/day, I swear.

I floss and still look like that. 😞

Me irl

Did The Simpsons single-handedly improve the UK's luxury bones a generation ago? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrpUSKE9p_M

They like to see us lying through our teeth