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[–] 104 points 2 days ago (8 children)

Mitch may not be happy tonight, but he's still smiling about it.

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  • [–] 27 points 2 days ago (6 children)

    I remember there being news earlier this year about Mitch saying sorry for shit he’s done. Probably was visited by three ghosts. 🌝

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  • [–] 14 points 2 days ago (3 children)

    1 is lindsey graham, confronted him.

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  • [–] 8 points 2 days ago* (2 children)

    Graham looks around, ”wait, I’m ghost number one?” He was about to complain, but saw #2 was dick Cheney, and shrugged to himself. Leaning over, he whispered “Yeah, okay, you’ve got me beat, but you shot a man in the face and then made him apologize. Who could possibly be the third ghost?”

    A rattling Bavarian accent floats towards them, “sometimes it takes a turtle to convince a turtle,” Graham and Cheney roll their eyes, trying and failing to seem good-natured and we cut to credits.

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  • [–] 26 points 2 days ago (6 children)
    [–] 13 points 2 days ago (1 child)

    Do we still not know what's going on with this guy???

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  • [–] 24 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

    It's too bad Booker didn't win. Replacing the 84 year old white turtle corpse with a black democrat literally half of his age would have been so so sweet. He'd have been rolling in his grave on the way down.

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  • [–] 10 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (4 children)

    I had to look up if he died or not.

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  • [–] 3 points 2 days ago (3 children)
  • [–] 15 points 2 days ago (2 children)

    Jesus, I read this three times this morning before I remembered that that dinosaur is still alive.

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  • [–] 8 points 2 days ago

    I still can't believe Graham's sister lost

    The GOP got their feelgood story yanked away from them

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  • [–] 4 points 2 days ago

    If you compete in a deadpool and you don't have McConnell as a rider on every list you're allowed, you're doing it wrong.

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  • [–] 4 points 2 days ago

    I was half expecting this to give Trump a stroke

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  • [–] 1 point 2 days ago