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[–] 110 points 3 months ago (13 children)

This reminds me of the time my niece was 2 years old, and in a resteraunt she started standing on the booth seat, instead of sitting.

So my brother in law (her dad) asked her to sit. And she didn't want to sit. So my BIL said "Look at everybody. Mommy's sitting. Daddy's sitting. Uncle is sitting. Nana is sitting. Everybody is sitting, and we'd like you to sit too! Can't eat food like that if you're standing!"

And then she sat down.

That was 10 years ago, and it stood out because if that were me at age 2, my dad would have just yelled and me, picked me up, and dropped me hard on my ass until I stopped getting up.

It was one of those "so THIS is what good parenting looks like...." moments.

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  • [–] 43 points 3 months ago (12 children)

    If everyone jumped off a cliff would you do it too? Don't fall for peer pressure!

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  • [–] 13 points 3 months ago (4 children)

    Yes, I would. I don't surround myself with stupid people and if they all jumped off a cliff there's a reason. I don't know what maybe a creature coming or a natural disaster. But if everyone decides best choice is to jump off the cliff... Its probably best choice

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  • [–] 15 points 3 months ago

    From Brooklyn 99

    Jake: "So, what, now I'm just supposed to do anything that Rosa does? I mean, what if she jumped off a cliff?"

    Captain Holt: "If Rosa were to jump off a cliff, she would've done her due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Rosa jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff."

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  • [–] 9 points 3 months ago* (3 children)

    God, I wish everyone would jump off a cliff. I'd hit up a pharmacy and a Lamborghini dealership and be living my best life way before I even figured out wtf happened to everyone. Hell, I'd likely be so continually high on a cocktail of chemicals that I'd be having lively conversations and never fully realize I was the only real person left.

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  • [–] 8 points 3 months ago* (2 children)

    I'd likely be so continually high on a cocktail of chemicals that I'd be having lively conversations and never fully realize I was the only real person left.

    Pretty bold assumption that out of over 8 billion people jumping off a cliff, not one of them would survive in a way that they could rescue themself. (Fuck it, if we're assuming it's literally "a cliff", singular, they'd probably physically have to stop at some point.)

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  • [–] 40 points 3 months ago* (1 child)

    This is actually really wholesome

    I wonder if their interest was in all popes or just a specific one

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  • [–] 37 points 3 months ago* (6 children)

    That's not true, a flock of Cardinals gathers around him and chews up food then spits it into the Pope's mouth. You should watch the National Geographic special on it, it's really quite amazing.

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  • [–] 16 points 3 months ago (3 children)

    The cardinals are the pope's fledglings, right? I think he's the one puking in their mouths.

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  • [–] 14 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    That's what I thought too, but it's more like the Cardinals are full adults and the Pope is the Queen of the hive. The Cardinals are all male, and they pamper the Pope, but once the Pope dies they all get together and decide which one will gender swap and become their next Queen. Then they cut off his penis and give him a new hat.

    Nature is so strange and beautiful.

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  • [–] 23 points 3 months ago (3 children)

    I absolutely love this. I worked with mentally ill adults and children and I knew a few who could use some custom lessons about hygiene.

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  • [–] [S] 8 points 3 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 18 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    [The Pope] does not bite people.

    John XII and Benedict IX did a whole lot of unpapal things; if you told me they bit some people I'd believe you.

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  • [–] 11 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    Boys need good, male role models.

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  • [–] 10 points 3 months ago
    [–] 10 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    Some people only understand things spoken in their own language.

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  • [–] 5 points 3 months ago
    [–] 6 points 3 months ago

    Respect for the kid. The new pope is kind of cool.

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  • [–] 3 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    But still, the Pope often takes fetuses from pregnant women and bite them over the spine with his teeth. He then cracks the fetuses open and suck the spinal fluid out of the spine.

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  • [–] 3 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    Well, it wouldn't have if the Pope of the time was Reginald the Bitey!

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