Plex has an automatic proxy service hosted by their public servers. If you haven't or can't configure port forwarding correctly, plex will route the connection through their own servers.

The problem is, that also means Plex co has total control over your server and the data sent between it and clients if they so choose. Anything from quietly logging the data sent back and fourth, to controlling who can connect and what they can do while they are.

Jellyfin has to be correctly exposed to the internet via port forwarding or tools like tailscale/a vpn; but it's entirely your server under your control. You have ultimate control over how your server can be accessed, but that also means you're responsible for actually setting that up.

Jellyfin is free open source software, they don't have the money to provide free proxies to their users.

No, not at all. Jellyfin you'd have to setup a proxy or some kind of VPN like tailscale for the remote client to be able to access the media. I started to try and figure it all out when I first set up my server but as I have said in another reply j dont really care to waste the time learning how to do it in a secure manner and minimise the friction on my other users so I dont know the ins and outs but jellyfin you absolutely can't just tick a box and share a library.

Also jellyfin meta data analysis was shit compared to Plex and so I'd have to spend even more time actually managing the server that I dont have to do with Plex.

Except that just isn't true unless you have prior knowledge of lots of other things. As with a lot of documentation within this space it all presumes prior knowledge of different things.

Most things you read or watch will start with just do x but if you don't already even know how to do x then you have to go down a further rabbit hole to find out how to do that. Everything you try and do is a series of these things so your 20 minute YouTube video turns into hours of trying to learn other things to tie in with it.

On top of that I dont understand the underlying security implications behind opening my network up to the outside world, it is all well and good following some 20 minute video but without understanding the underlying implications of what you are doing how can you really fully trust that information because I dont understand everything behind it?

Again, I never said it wasnt a skill issue, I literally agreed with you that it was....

Also why can I not comment and participate in a self hosting community just because I dont do things exactly the way YOU want me to does that mean I automatically can't participate?

It is your kind of hostile and condescending attitude along with documentation that assumes too much prior knowledge that makes both the self hosting and Linux communities really unwelcoming to people that are looking to even dip a toe into them. This all or nothing attitude where only your method of doing things is acceptable and anything else is seen as fair game for mockery and condescension.

I'm new to the space and maybe in the future as I learn more about it I can move on to other things as I gain the knowledge I need but people like you, whose attitude is just fucking shitty are really off putting in these spaces. Everyone needs to learn and the culture of condescension and mockery towards new users by a large majority of the existing user base doesn't make more people want to join in and learn.

Cheers for adding absolutely nothing to the conversation though and further putting me off wanting to learn any more or continue to interact with the communities though. You're really helping push adoption of things like this.