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[–] 54 points 7 months ago (3 children)

With this comic, I will now be better prepared. If something like this happens, I will simply say, "Hooray! My very own butt-snipes! Thank you! Where are the tongs?"

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  • [–] 17 points 7 months ago (2 children)

    Oh, we’re a bit bad at spelling. We meant β€œthongs”, so they won’t get stuck when they breach to breathe or snipe.

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  • [–] 51 points 7 months ago (4 children)

    I've seen enough hentai to know where this is going, but apparently not enough to know how the fuck we got here to begin with...?

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  • [–] 70 points 7 months ago (20 children)

    Just as likely an outcome as any.

    I read a great novella about a guy who was a devout Mormon who got sent to a truly chilling version of Hell because "I'm sorry, the correct answer was Zoroastrianism."

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  • [–] 23 points 7 months ago (17 children)

    Never heard of it before, but it seems to have been a major source for inspiration of Judaism, and from that of course Christianity and Islam.
    So since Zoroastrianism seems to have been the original monotheistic faith of the 4, it makes sense that the copies of the original are the fake ones. Except of course they are all fake, and none of them make the least bit of sense.

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  • [–] 13 points 7 months ago (5 children)

    And zoroastrianism split off/evolved from the old proto-Avestan traditions, which themselves evolved alongside/from an ancient Indo-iranian root, of which Hinduism is the only other surviving branch.

    Ten holy hecks, all major religions are cousins.

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  • [–] 8 points 7 months ago (2 children)

    I'd love to know what the most isolated religion is, the one that has the fewest common branches or cousins with any other Extant religions. It's probably something like those handful of languages which only have a handful of people alive who still speak them.

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  • [+] 10 points 7 months ago (4 children)
  • [–] 8 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    Tbh, everything flows and changes. There is no "original" that survives without major changes for millenia. People change, language changes, the meaning of words and the understanding of the fundamentals governing day-to-day life changes all the time.

    "Original" doesn't exist in real life.

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  • [–] 4 points 7 months ago (5 children)

    Heey now, die in battle and go to Valhalla!

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  • [–] 4 points 7 months ago (4 children)

    Way way better, no oppression requirements and no discrimination of minorities or foreigners.
    I think the Norse gods are probably among the least bad. And that's the reason the Scandinavian countries were the last among European countries to be Christened.

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    Yeah what the f were they thinking?!

    I remember wondering why when I learned about it in school.

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  • [–] 5 points 7 months ago (2 children)

    It is also notable that Christianity did not manage to change the name of winter solstice holiday to Christmas or something similar, Christianity is notable for taking over local traditional holidays, and rename them so they become completely absorbed as Christian holidays.
    But Scandinavian countries still call Christmas "Jul", so their is a strong trace of the original tradition.
    Luckily Scandinavian countries are also the first to abandon Christianity, and are among the least religious countries in the world.

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 8 points 7 months ago

    Yule or jΓ³l was new year for the Vikings. First day of Yule was the first day of the new year.
    This was probably the biggest holiday for the Vikings, and celebration started the evening before, just like we start celebrating New Years Eve in the evening before new year today.
    In Scandinavian countries Jul is still celebrated December 24 as "Jule aften" (Christmas evening).
    The Vikings celebrated with food and mead, and it was a 3 week "holiday".
    In 1575 new year celebrations were finally moved to December 30, and the Christian church tried to rename Jul to "Kristmesse" similar to Christmas for English speaking countries.
    Today Jul is still a mix of the old traditions and the celebration of the fable of the birth of Christ.
    We have many traditions that include "nisser" (pixies) and children's songs about them. "Nisser" are a more popular imagery of Christmas than anything Christian.

    So yule was not religious, it was a new years celebration.

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  • [–] 32 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    I'm impressed that the nun still got into this heaven - she must've been doing something right....

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  • [–] 29 points 7 months ago

    While they were eating, Jesus took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to his disciples, saying, β€œEveryone who get in gets a butt-snipe.”

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  • [–] 12 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    Which end of the snipe goes where?

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  • [–] 9 points 7 months ago

    Be not afraid.

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  • [–] 17 points 7 months ago (1 child)
  • Butt-snipes lookin kinda cute tho... 😳

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  • [–] 7 points 7 months ago (5 children)
  • [–] 23 points 7 months ago* (4 children)

    It means that chances are if there's a god and afterlife, humans didn't get it right.

    Come Judgment Day, we may find that Mumbo Jumbo the God of the Congo was the Big Boss all along.

    - Robert Heinlein

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  • [–] 5 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    Now that you explained the context, l really loved that comic strip.

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  • [–] 9 points 7 months ago

    Even the shitpost community can't top this madness.

    Are you serious xD

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