Not The Onion

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[–] TrippinMallard@lemmy.ml 9 points 7 months ago

So close to 100! Wonder what the Guinness World Record is?

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[–] FerretyFever0@fedia.io 17 points 7 months ago* (6 children)

Extremely unresponsible to be driving under the influence of hard drugs. If someone is going to be smoking meth and fentanyl, they should at least have the reason to not be driving.

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[–] DataCrime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 7 months ago (4 children)

I mean… it didn’t say he was smoking anything but weed out of the bong… probably but FFS, how about the 99 priors??? How was this asshole even behind the wheel of a vehicle? This stinks of a CI.

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[–] cactusupyourbutt@lemmy.world 6 points 7 months ago (1 child)

you shouldn’t be driving while smoking weed either

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[–] DataCrime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 7 months ago

I don’t think I ever claimed that one should. WTF know, maybe dude was talking the drugs to him mom so riddled with cancer she can’t live without the biggest pharmaceutical grade hammer we have… maybe not. I’ll be withholding judgement after the last Last Week Tonight.

Probably not your jam either, but even my conservative parents enjoy watching it. And I swear they listened to NPR for 5 years just to yell at the radio 😂

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[–] FerretyFever0@fedia.io 5 points 7 months ago (1 child)

The article said there was fentanyl, meth, and heroin. I'd guess that he wasn't just transporting it.

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[–] DataCrime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 7 months ago

I’m not saying he wasn’t using a bit of himself. I’m just saying a bong is typically used to smoke weed. Given the potency of Fentanyl I doubt he was just casually sprinkling a bit on top for flavor 😝

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[–] Pricklesthemagicfish@reddthat.com 6 points 7 months ago

Did you expect him to walk to the liquor store?

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 8 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (7 children)

97 prior arrests sounds like police harrassment, not illegal behavior.

logic this through with me. if he'd been convicted, there would be a hell of a lot fewer arrests.

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[–] Zak@lemmy.world 17 points 7 months ago (6 children)

Under other circumstances, I might agree with you, but the guy built a bong into his dashboard.

That's an impressive level of commitment to DUI.

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 8 points 7 months ago (4 children)

it's not convictions, it's arrests. after i'd been arrested (not convicted) 60 times, fuck obeying the law. the social contract broke.

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[–] Mesophar@pawb.social 4 points 7 months ago (3 children)

Fuck endangering other people

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 point 7 months ago (2 children)

fuck harassing people to the point they feel all life is worthless

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[–] Mesophar@pawb.social 4 points 7 months ago (1 child)

Pretty sure that is ALSO endangering other people

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 7 months ago*

Yeah I was agreeing, but in a fuck the police way. Seriously how did he get to 90 arrests. After 10 they should have had social services there to see why and how they could help. You can't get to that many arrests without police intentionally fucking up the prosecution to let him go and arrest him again.

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[–] PyroNeurosis@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 point 7 months ago

Where in the dash was it built? Maybe our hero is the designated driver with a passion for making sure that passengers riding shotgun never have to be sober.

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[–] athatet@lemmy.zip 2 points 7 months ago

Woah!

…based based based based based…

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[–] Slovene85@sh.itjust.works 65 points 7 months ago

"high" speed chase indeed

[–] potate@lemmy.ca 110 points 7 months ago (3 children)

But, but, I need a photo of this performance mod...

https://www.jalopnik.com/2132022/man-custom-bong-device-car-dashboard-arrested-98-times/

[–] ChonkyOwlbear@lemmy.world 16 points 7 months ago

Here's the video, but sadly it doesn't show the inside of the truck.

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[–] e8CArkcAuLE@piefed.social 22 points 7 months ago (1 child)

pics or it didn’t happen

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https://supernatural-images.s3.us-east-va.perf.cloud.ovh.us/thumb/2/26/AndyBong.jpg/700px-AndyBong.jpg

[–] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago

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[–] titanicx@lemmy.zip 94 points 7 months ago (6 children)

I am pissed off that I watched that video, and they didn't show the damn dash bong.

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 6 points 7 months ago (2 children)

yeah, i can think of a few rigs that are pretty easy to slap together but like, i'm stealing your rims if you want me to do that. and your distributor. fuck driving inebriated, i'll build you a hotbox but not a rolling one.

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[–] moonshadow@slrpnk.net 4 points 7 months ago* (1 child)

This is the post where I quit thinking you were cool. Now if you'll excuse me it's my rip, can't smoke drive and text. Not enough hands!

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 points 7 months ago

knees dude knees

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[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 5 points 7 months ago

I KNOW RIGHT WHY DO YOU THINK WE EVEN CLICKED ON THIS

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[–] Gammelfisch@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago (1 child)

Indeed, I wanted to see how the crazy mounted his bong on the dashboard. Adhesive, self-tapping screws, bolts, etc...on a gryo base?

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[–] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 3 points 7 months ago

bro they said built into the dash!

“custom bong device built into the dash ..."

yeah we GOTTA see this shit

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[–] Ferrous@lemmy.ml 35 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (13 children)

Dumbass cop was about to pitt maneuver this truck into an innocent car.

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[–] village604@adultswim.fan 19 points 7 months ago (10 children)

Yeah, high speed chases are monumentally stupid. Just use the radio to set up a road block.

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[–] thebestaquaman@lemmy.world 27 points 7 months ago (9 children)

Or, as is commonly done elsewhere, get their plates and a photo, and drop by their house later (unless they're an active threat to public safety of course).

This is literally the SOP in a lot of other countries: You don't chase someone in a vehicle unless you absolutely have to. You rather just identify them and apprehend them at a later point.

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[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 7 points 7 months ago (3 children)

Haha! You fell into the trap of my nuclear powered hyper bike! I never have to stop! Bwahahaha! Man, I gotta take a dump tho, fr.

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[–] fourtonetiger@lemmy.ca 5 points 7 months ago (2 children)

You don't have a toilet built into that thing?

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[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 5 points 7 months ago (1 child)

Too much aerodynamic drag.

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 7 months ago

just put a hole in the seat with some electric scissors (so i guess nuclear powered snippers) to slice off dingleberries. just, uh, if you've got some bait and tackle and don't want the at-home forcefemming don't forget to grab your gaff

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[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 5 points 7 months ago (1 child)

get their plates and a photo

Guy had 97 priors including DUIs. Doubtful that the truck had a valid registration/license plate with a traceable address.

I used to disc golf with a dude who had multiple DUIs and finally went to jail for it for 18 months. The fucking day he got out he bought a cheap used car, slapped an old out-of-state license plate on it, and went right back to driving around drunk as shit.

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[–] thebestaquaman@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago

Guy had 97 priors including DUIs.

Hence the photo, which should make it pretty easy to figure out who the guy is when he's already registered in the system. Once you know who he is you quickly find out where he's living, because again, the guy has 97 priors, so the cops should have a solid database on where he tends to reside and who he knows.

The fucking day he got out he bought a cheap used car, slapped an old out-of-state license plate on it, and went right back to driving around drunk as shit.

That's absolutely horrendous... hope he gets caught again before he kills someone...

Besides that: That could quickly be a situation where whoever is apprehending him recognises that he's drunk-driving and that he's a big enough threat to the public to warrant chasing him down instead of letting him go and apprehending him later.

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[–] kbobabob@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Later that evening at the cars registered address...

Cops bang on door at 3am, groggy the homeowner tries to figure out what's going on. 3am!?, what's going on? Better grab my gun in case it's someone trying to break in. Goes to the door and opens it, immediately gets blasted by the cops. The wife comes out screaming so they tase her and then calmly let her know they saw their stolen vehicle earlier so this needed to happen.

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[–] thebestaquaman@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago

Or, hear me out: The cops that are well enough educated and trained to recognise that it's safer to just track down the guy later will also be well enough educated and trained to not do that. Because doing that would be stupid, and the whole point here is that you can and should select and train people with a monopoly on violence to not do stupid shit that gets people killed.

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago

i mean my experience is they only do shit at 3am when they're trying to arrest people who they expect to be armed and trying to escape. if they're just doing ticket service, they stop by at dinnertime because it embarrasses you in front of the neighbors.

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[–] dotCody@lemmy.world 14 points 7 months ago (1 child)

Thank god I am not the only one to immediately catch that. What that pig attempted was FUCKING DANGEROUS.

And then another pig on the radio is heard giving clear instructions to not attempt unless below 70(mph). Still with plenty of other vehicles on the roads...

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[–] Ferrous@lemmy.ml 8 points 7 months ago

How else you going to live out your badass road warrior fantasies??

Fucken dunce..

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[–] DataCrime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 31 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Reminds me of a story I heard like 20-30 years ago. Some German dude wrecked his Merc on the autobahn… the cops get there and he just wreaks of schnapps but they find no bottles, no means of consumption. The car gets towed to a police station to be examined and they found that he had diverted the window washing tank into the cabin, dude wants a pug of schnapps and he hits his window washer button.

[–] Pauce@lemmy.ca 14 points 7 months ago (1 child)

That is a level of ingenuity that I love to see in people. Application of it is nooot great but he's got the spirit.

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[–] DataCrime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 7 months ago

Don’t you mean spirits?

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[–] Lupo@lemmy.world 25 points 7 months ago

Two more and he'll get a free ice cream

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 18 points 7 months ago* (1 child)

A high speed chase, or a high speed chase?

Also: wtf was with the pit maneuver when oncoming traffic was like less than a 100 feet ahead? Dumbass shit.

[–] titanicx@lemmy.zip 5 points 7 months ago

This whole chase was idiotic. Poor pit maneuver. Chasing suspect through traffic and intersections.

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[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 32 points 7 months ago (5 children)

What a great example of why police chases shouldn't be a thing, the cop was more dangerous than Smokey Pete.

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[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 33 points 7 months ago (3 children)

Cop tried bumping the truck on a fucking two-lane road with a car coming the opposite way. Holy Cheez-its.

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[–] modus@lemmy.world 15 points 7 months ago

It's almost as it cops aren't intelligent.

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[–] Bloomcole@lemmy.world 7 points 7 months ago (1 child)

I remember them shooting at a hijacked FedEx truck
It couldn't go fast anyway, had a tracker and was stuck in traffic with cars everywhere.
It was going nowhere.
No negotiating or thinking, the cops just started firing.
They killed everyone in the truck (driver/victim also) and at least 1 (or more if I remember correctly) of the unlucky commuters in the line of fire.

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[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 1 point 7 months ago

No negotiating or thinking, the cops just started firing.

They were thinking ... about how good the sex was going to be that night.

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[–] Bloomcole@lemmy.world 5 points 7 months ago

From another article:

*Two pursuits. Both were terminated because his driving was so reckless that it was dangerous to keep chasing him. He was blowing through intersections at high speed through downtown Olympia and into Lacey.

That’s how innocent people die. A family heading home. A kid crossing the street. We’re handing the wheel to a driver who’s apparently high on meth and fentanyl and has no intention of stopping.*

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[–] brown567@sh.itjust.works 14 points 7 months ago (1 child)

He definitely needs to get arrested 2 more times now

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 7 points 7 months ago

322*

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[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 28 points 7 months ago (11 children)

Why was he let go with so many priors?

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[–] Ioughttamow@fedia.io 36 points 7 months ago (1 child)

Ethical catch and release

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[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 15 points 7 months ago

What? Is he too small?

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[–] village604@adultswim.fan 4 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Arrested != convicted

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[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 15 points 7 months ago (1 child)

If someone managed to get arrested so many times without getting a conviction the one or other time, it would be a cause for a harrasment claim against the police.

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[–] village604@adultswim.fan 5 points 7 months ago

I mean, in some areas they just throw you in the holding cell until you sober up, which would be an arrest. Dude probably knows someone in the system.

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[+] Luminous5481@anarchist.nexus 1 point 7 months ago (5 children)

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[–] FerretyFever0@fedia.io 14 points 7 months ago

Maybe I'm just insane, but I think that laws making it illegal to be on meth while driving are reasonable. That's just me though.

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[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 8 points 7 months ago (3 children)

Because the law is still valid? If you consider the law stupid, do something against it.

I personally don't consider it stupid to forbid driving under influence, regardless of the means.

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[+] Luminous5481@anarchist.nexus -4 points 7 months ago (3 children)

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[–] FerretyFever0@fedia.io 4 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Sorry, all of them? You don't think that sometimes, it's good for some things to not be allowed?

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[+] Luminous5481@anarchist.nexus 1 point 7 months ago (2 children)

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[–] FerretyFever0@fedia.io 3 points 7 months ago (1 child)

In the case of this gentleman, I suppose not. However, I believe that driving after consuming drugs that impede your ability to drive should have a punishment of some kind. It is a matter of public safety. It's irresponsible to drink and drive, it's irresponsible to be on heroin while driving.

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[+] Luminous5481@anarchist.nexus 1 point 7 months ago (1 child)

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[–] FerretyFever0@fedia.io 2 points 7 months ago

It should be one's own morality, yes. But I find it rather obvious that many individuals lack sufficient morality to act in the interest of others. Laws, and the punishments for breaking those laws, are supposedly meant to force the actions of the immoral to align with that of the moral as far as public safety is concerned. Of course, this is only true when the laws are just, but the prevention of people driving while high is a worthwhile goal, and it is reasonable to punish those that partake in methamphetamines while operating a large hunk of metal that can easily kill people.

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[–] Soggy@lemmy.world 1 point 7 months ago

Every layer of the legal system is broken, and lots of people benefit from not fixing it.

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[–] robocall@lemmy.world 9 points 7 months ago

He should put that on his resume

[–] FelixCress@lemmy.world 12 points 7 months ago*

You must appreciate his persistence.

Paywall BTW.

[–] GhostFish@piefed.social 6 points 7 months ago

Someone pardon this man.

[–] JustJack23@slrpnk.net 10 points 7 months ago (3 children)

What if, hear me out, you confiscated the car at any of the previous 95 stops?

Oh yeah this is America so it will make it impossible for you to live..... You know what, in that scenario dash bong seems totally reasonable.

[–] grue@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago (1 child)

Somehow, we manage to have the problem of assholes like this racking up dozens upon dozens of priors with (obviously) ineffective punishment and would-be productive citizens languishing with long prison sentences for trivial offenses at the same time.

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[–] JustJack23@slrpnk.net 1 point 7 months ago

A bit shortsighted no?

The whole punative system is shit and should be changed rather drastically.

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[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 2 points 7 months ago*

95 arrests, not 95 stops

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[–] MagnificentSteiner@lemmy.zip 8 points 7 months ago (1 child)

99th time's the charm!

[–] Kowowow@lemmy.ca 4 points 7 months ago

No he's going out rolls over to zero after one hundred

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[–] BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago (1 child)

I have been living my whole life wrong.

[–] TwilitSky@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago

Ok but the judge already said that.

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[–] muxika@piefed.muxika.org 4 points 7 months ago

If Grand Theft Auto were a Souls-like.

[–] seathru 3 points 7 months ago

@10s did the cop try to pit him off an overpass?

[–] foggy@lemmy.world 3 points 7 months ago (1 child)

My friend's dad had a kegerator built into his truck. Tap was in the center console.

He's either dead or still driving tow trucks.

[–] FatVegan@leminal.space 0 points 7 months ago

Let's hope for the former

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[+] Luminous5481@anarchist.nexus 2 points 7 months ago (2 children)

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[–] limonfiesta@lemmy.world 5 points 7 months ago (1 child)

You should definitely NOT read the story, because if you do, you'll feel really fucking stupid for saying that.

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[+] Luminous5481@anarchist.nexus -5 points 7 months ago (1 child)

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[–] Trainguyrom@reddthat.com 6 points 7 months ago

Driving under the influence is not cool in any situation though

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[–] Bloomcole@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago (3 children)

I knew he wasn't black, (the odds of being arrested 97 without being fatally shot is too small) but is he an ex-cop or related?
What I see from the banana republic it doesn't take too much, certainly repeat offenses to put you in jail for decades/life.
This guy still can drive and what's even more strange is the lack of name and mugshot.
American news invariably shame their criminals, publish the address etc..
So who is this guy?

[–] OopsOverbombing@lemmy.world 3 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Nobody. Washington seems to have a lot of repeat offenders that are in and out of the legal system. There's been multiple instances where someone out on bail commits another crime and makes headlines.

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[–] Bloomcole@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago* (1 child)

98!
that's Epstein levels of protection if you're still free.

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[–] OopsOverbombing@lemmy.world 1 point 7 months ago

This guy is aiming for the high score apparently? It's astounding this man has such a lengthy record and was still roaming free. I wonder how long until he's out again?