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[–] 109 points 8 months ago (1 child)

Do a full year gradually reduce the frequency then start ramping up with the reveal on Christmas day when they open presents with cans of beans in them.

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  • [–] 98 points 8 months ago (4 children)

    I think Lemmy has contracted the beans virus a few times.

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  • [–] 80 points 8 months ago (4 children)
  • [–] 29 points 8 months ago* (1 child)

    They’re also just gross.

    I don’t remember how it happened but I wound up with one can of Goya and one can of (I think) Hanover Butter Beans.

    The Goya beans were slimy, smushed, having fewer and overall shittier beans compared to the other brand.

    So fuck Goya for everything you said but also fuck them for having a shit ass product.

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  • [–] 8 points 8 months ago

    I still remember when that happened. I worked at a grocery store at the time and so many MAGA came and bought so much Goya by the case. Never saw them by those ever again even when they did get beans (many of them were regulars and it was a small store so there was only ever 1 cashier on duty at any time unless it got busy).

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  • [–] 25 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    The bean virus spreads quickly through Lemmy. Beware.

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    [–] 23 points 8 months ago (34 children)
  • [–] 21 points 8 months ago (3 children)

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Did you know uncooked kidney beans are toxic and can cause severe illness if consumed raw, but cooking them properly makes them safe to eat? (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Undercooked beans are more toxic than raw ones. They're often undercooked when people use a slow cooker at a temperature setting too low to destroy the toxins! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Refried beans are only fried once! The misconception about them being 'refried' arose from a bad translation of 'frijoles refritos', which actualy means 'well-fried beans!' (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Beans are environmentally friendly, thanks to their ability to fix nitrogen in the soil and reduce the need for synthetic fertilizers! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Beans can be ground into flour, offering a gluten-free alternative for baking and cooking that adds a unique flavor and texture to recipes! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Almost every part of the Winged Bean plant is edible. The pods, leaves, flowers, and even the tuberous roots can be consumed! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Beans can be made into burgers, cakes, drinks, pies, fudge, muffins, jewelry, bean-bag chairs, toys, and musical instruments! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! The oldest known bean was found in a cave in Thailand, and is estimated to be over 9,000 years old! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! The phrase "spill the beans" originated from an ancient Greek voting system, where beans were used to cast votes! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Lemmy Kilmister, the legendary frontman of Motörhead, was known for his unique diet, which included cold baked bean sandwiches! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago

    Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! The most baked beans eaten with chopsticks in one minute is 89, and was achieved by Annalia Henderson (USA) in Torrance, California, USA, on 1 December 2024! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )

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  • [–] 21 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    They know it is coming from OP but keep the ruse going to avoid crushing what they consider OPs only source of self gratification and pleasure going on in OPs otherwise unremarkable life.

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  • [–] 19 points 8 months ago (3 children)

    I had some friends in high school who thought it was really funny to leave loaves of bread in peoples' mailboxes. When one guy asked about it, they told him it was from the government.

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    [–] 19 points 8 months ago

    This sounds fun. 😂

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  • [–] 18 points 8 months ago (2 children)
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    [–] 26 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    Goya, the company that paid Trump to shill those shitty beans in the Oval Office. Our world has become a constant Onion headline.

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  • [–] 35 points 8 months ago (3 children)

    Oh, hey, the shithead who caused me to boycott Goya apparently got the boot last year. Too bad Goya waited five too many years; I'll be keeping my business elsewhere indefinitely.

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  • [–] 15 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    To be fair, from that article:

    At the time, the nine-person board was in favor of removing Unanue from the company entirely, but the regulations of the family-owned business, founded in 1936 by Prudencio Unanue Ortiz — Robert Unanue’s grandfather — would not allow it, as noted by the New York Post.

    Though shitty company policies are also a good reason to boycott a company.

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  • [–] 8 points 8 months ago*

    Extremely valid point, and I forgot to bring this up: I read the NYP article (god help me), and I could find no evidence of that claim (which surprises me NJ.com cited it for that). In fact, there's even counterevidence within the Post's article:

    Some Goya owners have also asked the board to present a motion to remove Unanue as CEO because he’s been using the company to promote his political views, sources said.

    “More than 50 percent of the shareholders do not want Bob to be the CEO,” a Goya source said. “All these political statements that Bob is making is dangerous for the company and for us personally as owners,” this person added.

    “It will hurt the Unanue name and company if he continues,” a second Goya source and shareholder said. “He should be thrown out as CEO. I think it’s really hurting us.”

    In an interview with The Post last week leading up to Friday’s vote, Unanue acknowledged that his job may be on the line.

    “I’m attacked by my own family” he said. “I could be fired tomorrow … whatever. It’s touch and go.”

    As The Post exclusively reported last year, Unanue narrowly escaped losing his job when he nixed an effort to sell a minority stake in the company to a private equity investor that would have brought in a non-family member CEO for the first time in the company’s 85-year history.

    It's still possible that there's some other source describing this alleged restriction, but I don't know of it.

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  • [–] 6 points 8 months ago

    I mean, not using a corruptible president is just leaving money on the table. It’s not like-

    “…his vocal support of President Donald Trump”

    I hope he develops a debilitating gambling addiction so he might one day experience hardship again.

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  • [–] 22 points 8 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 8 points 8 months ago

    I need the bean virus

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  • [–] 6 points 8 months ago

    this is the exact kind of prank i'd pull on my family except they're all logged into the same accounts i am. and i'm too broke to afford a second doordash.

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  • [–] 6 points 8 months ago* (1 child)

    Brushing is an actual scam / deceitful practice, which involves receiving items you didn't order

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brushing_(e-commerce)

    It doesn't usually happen with beans

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  • [–] 5 points 8 months ago (4 children)

    I love beans, this would be a very useful prank if someone did it to me

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  • [–] 4 points 8 months ago*

    They're actually smart to be wary of computer viruses. It just seems mean to take advantage of their ignorance of them like that, unless they're assholes and deserve it.

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  • [–] 4 points 8 months ago
    [–] 0 points 8 months ago

    Screenshot of a tweet of a screenshot

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