Okay, unrelated to any of the absurd Trump nonsense, what movie is this from? Is that Mark Rufallo? Whoever he is, that character is my Spirit Animal

Ooo I wonder if this will lead to be if the few serious articles

It just never stops being relevant does it

I read the headline and thought for sure it was the onion at first

Onion needs to rebrand and just be factual, real reporting now.

Nothing they can create is more absurd than this bizarre world we've found ourselves in.

Oh no, there's going to be all sorts of government contracts paid out for this. THEN nothing will be done.

yeah like that ball room

"There was no indication the Patriot Games would pit competitors against each other in a fight to the death, as of this writing." Lmaoo

Funny thing is, if they decided policy this way I'd guess it'd be more representative than the House of Representatives for California.

Well he didn't say it per se, as he had an AI version of him announce it officially. Wish I was joking.

Wow, now even Snopes has the “give us your email for access” bullshit?! How disappointing.

They're giving Trump and his family busy work to do while people like Stephen Miller and Pete Hegseth do more heinous things. It will be as pathetic as their military parade.

It will happen…it will just be partisan, shitty and tacky when it does.

i had to look it up too, he actually announced that

Nope

At this point if anything says Trump is doing something so ridiculously stupid that nobody would really do that then it is true because it has been 100% of the time.

Sometimes I notice such a thing posted by the Onion and figure they found a way to predict the future.

Ohwow

Farquaad (from shrek) == fuckwad

How have I missed that til now?

Eh, Highschool age is probably too old for Trumps interest.

Judging by the photos and how handsy he was with Ivanka, he probably likes them much younger.

Or any of the rest of us.

Surprising, since inclusivity is woke.

Well the Guamanians or Samoans are gonna kick everyone's asses.

Worse than in many cases.

Enjoyed the book, looking forward to seeing what they do with this movie.

I approved it for public release

No you didn't, you left the neckussy visible.

He is not. A Trump never pays his bills.

I mean, it is, but somehow it's also actually happening.

Ever since the island got raided, he's needed a new venue to find little girls.

What do you think football is for? A vehicle for bribes and keeping people from grabbing torches and pitchforks

Stephen King wrote it, like in the 70s or something, apparently

They'd starve to death if it means owning a lib.

Good thing those scientists were able to build the torment nexus!

if it wasn't fascist bread and circus then by itself it isn't a bad idea.

in the context, it's a shitty idea, especially when the economy is collapsing, pedo files are illegally held, and ICE is at war with American cities.