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[–] 149 points 1 year ago* (10 children)

This is the most French title I'll read today. Did he have a baguette too? And, a striped shirt, and beret?

Seriously, glad he's okay.

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  • [–] 59 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

    The baguette cushioned his fall and the striped shirt scared away any predators. The beret was just a beret, though. Even if you've fallen down a 130ft ravine that's no excuse to look dowdy.

    (None of this is true...probably)

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  • [–] 56 points 1 year ago* (1 child)

    I appreciate the man's priorities: he fell 130 feet and managed to not break the wine bottles.

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  • [–] 46 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    In 2023, a woman who went missing for five days in the Australian bushland was found alive after surviving for five days on lollipops and wine.

    Yet another reminder to keep a stockpile of food and water in your abodes and cars just-in-case. I haven't been stranded out and about yet, but there was a blizzard a few years ago that I was unprepared for and I nearly ran out of food.

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  • [–] 28 points 1 year ago

    He has to be the most French person ever.

    Everything about this story is totally believable, the fact that a French person would have wine in a shopping bag and that they would choose to transport it via bicycle along a dusty road by a cliff. The French just do not seem to believe in putting up barriers near the edges of large cliffs, you just have to path and then 1 mm of grass and then a drop to the bottom of the world.

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  • [–] 27 points 1 year ago (4 children)

    130 foot is almost 40 meters.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago (3 children)
  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago* (1 child)

    No you have to use something that doesn't really help anyone understand size because nobody really really knows how big it is. I saw a news article that described a boulder that had fallen from the side of a cliff onto the road as, "a large boulder, the size of three small boulders".

    That's almost the size of 95 corgis.

    Or you introduce unnecessary macabre

    It's the size of two and three quarter elephants

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  • [–] 24 points 1 year ago (5 children)

    I think most people would wine and complain after falling into a ravine like that.

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  • [–] 20 points 1 year ago

    Wine only? But no mention of Baguette and cigarettes? I don't believe it.

    It must not have been a Frenchman. A Quebecois maybe. They would fall of a cliff and only have wine.

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  • [–] 17 points 1 year ago

    My ass would've just pounded the bottle and said "this is how I go out" within the first hour.

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  • [–] 14 points 1 year ago

    It sounds more like he thrived for three days.

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  • [–] 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    That's the indomitable human spirit.

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  • [–] 27 points 1 year ago

    “77-year old alcoholic falls off bike after visiting his dealer.” But seriously, ALWAYS add a bottle of wine when shopping for anything, people. #safetyfirst

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago (3 children)

    How did the wine not dehydrate them?

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  • [–] 29 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    Common misconception. Diuretics simply cause you to urinate more often. It does not necessarily mean you will urinate more than the water you are taking in. Coffee also falls into this category. The most known "don't drink this or you'll dehydrate" salt water will cause you to urinate more than the water you take in. Salt water is about 3.5% salt. Your kidneys can only function up to like 2%. This makes your body pull water from elsewhere to flush the excess salt out of your system.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    Did he start drinking after falling down or before???

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  • [–] 7 points 1 year ago

    Me after I'm found at the bottom of a cliff 3 days after I got shitfaced on my grocery store wine and rode off it.

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  • [–] 30 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (13 children)

    I feel like three days isn't enough time to die from the absence of wine, but then again I'm not French.

    It's just funny the way the headline is written. I'm assuming they meant more along the lines of "survives 3 days while drinking wine" not "survives 3 days by drinking wine" lol because unless you are starting out extremely dehydrated already, then a 3-day dry fast is absolutely not going to kill you.

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  • [–] 13 points 1 year ago (3 children)

    ??? 3 days without water can definitely be lethal

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  • [–] 14 points 1 year ago

    Well yeah, 10 minutes without water can definitely be lethal under the right circumstances too if you are already only 10 minutes away from dying from dehydration. I'm just saying that lying mostly still in a sunless ravine in autumn in France for 72 hours, while it's raining, is not peak conditions for quick death from dehydration. And in any case, all I'm really saying is that claiming the guy survived by drinking the wine, meaning he would have otherwise died from dehydration, is not a supoortable conclusion and is just there to make the headline more fun.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago (1 child)

    He wasn't in the Rockies. It was France in October. The issue would have been to stay warm so I don't imagine dehydration was seriously an issue obviously it would have become eventually but not after 3 days.

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  • [–] 25 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (8 children)

    Three to four days is the longest you can survive without water before you die. So he probably would have been dead or close to death without the wine.

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  • [+] -1 points 1 year ago (7 children)
  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago (6 children)
  • [+] 1 point 1 year ago (2 children)
  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago* (1 child)

    BBC science News today says it will hydrate you enough to keep you alive. The guy in the news story stayed alive too.

    https://www.sciencefocus.com/the-human-body/on-a-desert-island-would-it-be-better-to-drink-wine-or-go-thirsty

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  • [–] -1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    The threshold for dehydration is about 2% alcohol, so no it won't

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  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    Wine would provide enough hydration to prevent you from dying of thirst.

    Source On a desert island, would it be better to drink wine or go thirsty? - BBC Science Focus Magazine https://www.sciencefocus.com/the-human-body/on-a-desert-island-would-it-be-better-to-drink-wine-or-go-thirsty

    "For the 13 per cent alcohol content of most wines, that equilibrium point would still leave you badly dehydrated (not to mention hopelessly drunk), but it should prevent you from dying of thirst"

    Very similar situation to the news story we're commenting on.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago

    Oh, thanks for that, I read different but here's the key thing that I think was missing from the analysis I read:

    But the concentration of alcohol required for this increases as you get thirstier. If you just drank wine on your desert island, you would initially lose more water than you gain from wine, but as your body became more dehydrated, it would produce more ADH to compensate and you'd eventually reach an equilibrium point.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago

    If it would have been somewhere else:

    Day one:

    Day three:

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    That is the most french news headline I have read in a while

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago

    “I BeT tHe cYcliSt rAn tHe ReD LiGHt!”

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago

    Perhaps a shorter pump is the answer.

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  • 27 comments in c/nottheonion@lemmy.world view that post
    [–] 86 points 1 year ago* (3 children)

    "His attempt to rescue himself using a ladder constructed from Baguettes sadly failed. Thankfully, rescuers were able to locate him after a passerby noticed a thin trail of cigarette smoke rising from the ravine."

    Truly glad he got rescued, fuckin' hell I hope it was at least a decent bottle and that there's no lasting injuries.

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  • [–] 24 points 1 year ago (7 children)

    I knew isotonic is not the best bicyclist's drink to carry around.

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  • [–] 18 points 1 year ago (6 children)

    Of course, this is a standard accessory on any French bicycle.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago (3 children)

    Why wouldn't you carry it in a shopping bag?

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago (2 children)

    But then how do you carry the shopping bag?

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  • [–] 22 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    Could have lasted a week if he had a baguette and some cheese. Lesson learned.

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  • [–] 17 points 1 year ago

    This is probably also what I would say if I were ever found passed out in a ditch.

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  • [–] 30 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    77-yo, rolled 130' downhill, survived with what he had on him. I feel like most y'all would simply die.

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  • [–] 13 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    He fell down a 40m ravine and bottle didn't smash?

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  • [–] 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

    This is an ad from Big French Wine

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  • [–] 9 points 1 year ago

    He didn't just survive, he thrived.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    Christ, what a walking (cycling) stereotype.

    I guess if he got hungry he could have started on the string of garlic he was wearing around his neck.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    this is just such a french headline it's incredible :D

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  • 10 comments in c/bicycling@lemmy.world view that post
    [–] 10 points 1 year ago

    When you think about it, the "in France" part was unnecessary.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

    I need to know what wine he drank, those bottles must be tough as shit.

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  • [–] 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    A corked bottle of wine is quite resistant to breaking. The cork keeps the air in so it has nowhere to go when the bottle is struck and pushes back against the external forces.

    It's not uncommon for somebody to have difficulty breaking a Champaign bottle while christening a ship.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago (1 child)

    Yeah it usually takes a couple of hits to break the bottle against the ship, how many times do you think those bottles smashed against the ground as he fell 130 ft.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago
    [–] 3 points 1 year ago

    How quintessentially French.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    This is one of the most French stories I've ever heard.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    Fuck yeah dude!

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago

    Dude got to celebrate that KOM descent with wine. Absolute Chad.

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  • 2 comments in c/offbeat@lemmy.ca view that post
    [–] 7 points 1 year ago

    I was ready to be pissed at a young reckless dude that went biking alone in a mountain, turns out it was a 77 yo man on his way home...

    Also :

    This isn't the first time a person has endured harsh conditions with a bottle of wine. In 2023, a woman who went missing for five days in the Australian bushland was found alive after surviving for five days on lollipops and wine.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago

    I wish I'm that strong and lively when I'm 77.

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