I feel like I shouldn't joke about this one as it might be more than a flu, so I won't write a joke comment. I sincerely hope that your niece gets better and I wish them strenght to fight biology against all odds. I know that your niece is loved, because you writing this comment means that they are in your thoughts, and that makes me happy.

Love them unconditionally and you will also give them strength to carry on and fight their body or external attacks against the body. The world throws shit at us every chance it gets, but your niece is a strong warrior who has survived until now. Support them, give them love, be there for them so they can build up their strenght when it's momentarily waining.

Unfortunately I can not directly alter the human mind as it's against the wizard code of ethics :( But I do that on my own and try to do my best to remove ignorance and hate from the minds of people with the power of projecting compassion where possible. If a human is too deep in their own ignorance, then I try to protect others around them to the best of my ability.

What makes a man turn neutral?

Granted, please study this scroll (website): https://www.gapminder.org/

(BEFORE YOU ENTER THAT WEBSITE READ THIS: I know people are incredibly pessimistic about good news on lemmy, but please know that the linked website was created by Hans Rosling (RIP), his family and the foundation they created to carry on his work. Hans Rosling was a swedish physician and an academic who wrote "Factfulness" (that I highly recommend to everyone, even though it was pre-corona pandemic) and who believed in a better world enough to dedicate his life to make it better)

This is an impossible task unfortunately as we haven't been able to find a way to reverse aging with magic despite millenia of dedicated research into magic. You must continue living as an adult/young woman, Lena, or talk to a dark alchemist or a warlock.

Done, but it can't penetrate a specific magical shield (sunscreen) and it's eco friendly so it's a bit slow. Gets faster with time though as the evil people keep doing evil things and unfortunately doesn't discriminate who it zaps :( wear your magishields (sunscreen)!

My staff just said P≠NP

could you just make P equal big P please

Granted, but sorry about my terrible staff (hand) writing.

I'm sorry today is all about bending, unbendings only on monday and tuesday between 11:11 - 13:23 :(

Granted, please subscribed to these: !cat@lemmy.world !aww@lemmy.ml !illegallysmolcats@lemmy.world !animals@beehaw.org

Wizard school was a scam, just become a sorcerer/ess and save your money.

Great, you broke my staff. Happy now?!

Granted, pick up from any of our distribution locations world wide: https://tammojan.github.io/meteormap/

You have been granted an evening with your favourite drink, snacks, and favourite form of relaxation/entertainment media at home. You may also cancel any plans on short notice tonight without any repercussions or possible damage to your relationships due to cancellations.

Granted, you have access to the worlds finest of tunes in the palm of your hands: https://radio.garden/

Unfortunately the Wizard's Code of Ethics prohibits this due to massive deforestation events that occur when we conjure chocolate :( Magic giveth but magic also sometimes taketh

Buy chocolate from responsible producers!

Granted, you can shapeshift to almost any form, but you should get started with pigeon, cow, a hero, or a pyramid: https://www.yogajournal.com/poses/poses-by-level/beginners-poses

Sadly I can't alter others directly due to Wizard Code of Ethics... But yeah we as a species should collectively chill the fuck out I agree.

I can't directly alter humans due to the Wizard Code of Ethics :( but I know of a warlock...

Cloaks need to come back into style, so granted. But skirt with pockets? You'll only find that in the school of !witchymemes@lemmy.world. Those witches are powerful beyond my ability.

Edit after reading the second part: Rude, How dare you! I might have barely passed but I'm still a full member of the Wizard School Alumni! I take the cloak back, thank you.

Hey I hope you are ok. I would never do that to you. I hope that whatever you are going through will pass and that you don't give up on living, as painful as that might be right now.

I just want you to know that this random internet wizard wannabe is sincerely wishing you well and hopes you can catch a break from all the shit life is throwing at you right now.

I only learned how to conjure crocs :(

Oh good because my mana can't handle more than that.

Sadly I can't alter the minds of others directly :( but I'll be sure to bring cookies to the library (work) on monday to partially grant your wish!

What have you done! You just summoned the great Acos'sht'gtsk!

Edit: and they brought portabello mozzarella sticks - all good.

Uh oh... Here sir.

Granted, the bacteria are working on it double time. But not faster than that, because the smart little shits unionized.

Granted, your pocket is a worm hole into another dimension, but the location hqppens to be a pocket of the same size and constant, stable connection has been created. Making it feel like a normal pocket.

Your mind seems to be in conflict, but I see that this is due to another person here summoning a demon which is distorting your ability to think right now. I'll bring you potatoes, oil and herbs (to make chips in the oven) to remove the effect.

Thank you. I will make sure to fulfill your wish! Guess I'll go to the cinema tonight afterall :)

I just finished my wizard school man, I barely know how to conjure a sandwich. But regardless, I will help you with this and contribute to the advancement of human magic (science) towards that goal by concentrating my magic (compute power) towards the advancement and research of that magic study: https://boinc.berkeley.edu/

(NOTICE: I had the above linked project in my bookmarks, I recall there are many projects similar to this one. If you want to contribute, look into "sharing computing power for research" and choose an organization / university you feel the most comfortable with)