I asked a couple of them out. Or, I tried to. It never really worked. I think they kinda hated me, cause I was a textbook nerdy incel, lol. Never wore glasses tho...
It was so bad that I was only friends with like one or two girls. And I can't blame them, I was fucking awful at the time...

But then, when I was about 15 years old, I started purposefully building a yaoi collection in my free time. It's a massive folder now, even tho I no longer use it. It was summer and me and my best friend at the time decided to play truth or dare. Playing a cheap CSGO clone on our phones, we decided the winner tops the loser. And well...I lost completely on purpose.

And that was my first time, ever. With a guy, nonetheless. At 15, with my "best friend". It wasn't special, there was no fanfare, it was just a stupid dare we thought would be funny. Today, I know the guy is a bigoted, hateful asshole who's dating a TERF and they both hate my guts for being trans, but it was...an experience.

And after that, I completely gave up on forcing myself to like girls. I finally admitted to myself that I like men and men only. I started being much more comfortable in their presence, I started noticing them more and I started...fantisizing...about them, about sleeping with them.

And ofc, years later I met my lovely boyfriend and I started HRT, meaning the progesterone makes me want nothing more than to be pinned down and take men's cocks, over and over and over again until I can't walk straight 😂

But yeah...I still remember my first time. And I just wish it could've been on HRT already, so that it would have been more special. And I also kinda wish it would've been with a person that doesn't hate my existence :P