this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2026

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After taking rule for the first time... [CW: slightly offensive, CW: depiction of "incels"] (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 2 days ago by ShadowOfMiisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/onehundredninetysix@lemmy.blahaj.zone

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Oh my god 😭
I can't say I was ever short, but this is kinda totally my case...

very TMI, Miisha loredump

I used to think I was into girls...sorta. From 12 until like 15 years old, I honestly believed that. Not that I was attracted to them, but rather I envied them (I know that now, lol). Still, I felt like liking girls was the "correct" thing to do. My mom sure wanted me to get a gf. Every single guy around me was talking about their attraction to girls. And I just thought I had to...

I asked a couple of them out. Or, I tried to. It never really worked. I think they kinda hated me, cause I was a textbook nerdy incel, lol. Never wore glasses tho...
It was so bad that I was only friends with like one or two girls. And I can't blame them, I was fucking awful at the time...

But then, when I was about 15 years old, I started purposefully building a yaoi collection in my free time. It's a massive folder now, even tho I no longer use it. It was summer and me and my best friend at the time decided to play truth or dare. Playing a cheap CSGO clone on our phones, we decided the winner tops the loser. And well...I lost completely on purpose.

And that was my first time, ever. With a guy, nonetheless. At 15, with my "best friend". It wasn't special, there was no fanfare, it was just a stupid dare we thought would be funny. Today, I know the guy is a bigoted, hateful asshole who's dating a TERF and they both hate my guts for being trans, but it was...an experience.

And after that, I completely gave up on forcing myself to like girls. I finally admitted to myself that I like men and men only. I started being much more comfortable in their presence, I started noticing them more and I started...fantisizing...about them, about sleeping with them.

And ofc, years later I met my lovely boyfriend and I started HRT, meaning the progesterone makes me want nothing more than to be pinned down and take men's cocks, over and over and over again until I can't walk straight 😂

But yeah...I still remember my first time. And I just wish it could've been on HRT already, so that it would have been more special. And I also kinda wish it would've been with a person that doesn't hate my existence :P

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[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 day ago (1 child)

It was less so tied to femininity and more so tied to realizing I was queer. It was a gateway to so many things I needed to learn about myself, from being trans to being poly. Breaking the cishet illusion totally changed the game for me, and while it sucks that the process was such a process, I'm happy to know what I know now.

For the time being, while I do think trying men would be fun, I have little interest in seeking them out. I'm far more attracted to women and femmes, plus I don't have much interest in seeking any relationships with men in particular. I like spending time with women more and don't feel pressured to hang out with guys like I used to. I'm currently content with leaving the possibility open, but I would never go out of my way for it. If it happens it happens.

Making a platonic relationship intimate is absolutely a vibe. Part of it is making a deep relationship even deeper, and part of it is the thrill of testing that relationship. That said, it is inherently risky, and I know how much those situations can fuck you up.

Also, 19 is a great age to start. I didn't even think suspect I might be trans until around that age

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[–] ShadowOfMiisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone [S] 2 points 1 day ago

I'm glad you're here, girl. All of us. Even tho it doesn't seem that way, we've all made it so far. It's amazing 💜

I think keeping it as an open possibility is a good idea. It's your choice, in any case!

Best of luck, lovely person who isn't Jessica ❤️

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