TIL people have different tastes in coffee than me.

His own dick in his coffee is fine though.

I don’t want ducks in my coffee either.

He doesn't want other people's dicks in his coffee, only in his ass

Damnit babe, this is the third time this week you've tried to serve me dick coffee.

🤷🏻 Seems reasonable...

I know he's trying to call her a cheating whore and all but what he actually claimed is that she put another dude's dick in his coffee.

Which, tbf, is worth breaking up over, regardless of how attached to its previous owner the dick was.

I'm more worried about whoever got their dick in my hot coffee. You need medical attention, bruh.

Yeah, a penis would displace a ton of the coffee vs a regular stir stick.

Listen Dan, the sooner you admit you’re gay af the happier you’ll be.