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[–] 35 points 4 months ago

A week later

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  • [–] 12 points 4 months ago

    He pawned it for a bag of trash

    Gotta get that bread

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  • [–] 9 points 4 months ago

    Sumbitch is armed and dangerous robbing trash cans all across the county!

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  • [–] 9 points 4 months ago

    The sequel to Squirrel With a Gun?

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  • [–] 7 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    The racoon looks like it said, 'Yo Gary, chill,' all concerned and shit.

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  • [–] 6 points 4 months ago

    here kid, go do a justice

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  • [–] 3 points 4 months ago
    [–] 5 points 4 months ago* (4 children)

    ... as was foretold.

    Now somewhere in the Black Mountain Hills of Dakota

    There lived a young boy named Rocky Raccoon.

    And one day his woman ran off with another guy.

    Hit young Rocky in the eye Rocky didn't like that.

    He said "I'm gonna get that boy."

    So one day he walked into town

    Booked himself a room in the local saloon.

    Rocky Raccoon checked into his room,

    Only to find Gideon's Bible.

    Rocky had come, equipped with a gun,

    To shoot off the legs of his rival.

    His rival, it seems, had broken his dreams,

    By stealing the girl of his fancy.

    Her name was Magill, and she called herself Lil,

    But ev'ryone knew her as Nancy.

    Now she and her man, who called himself Dan,

    Were in the next room at the hoedown.

    Rocky burst in, and grinning a grin,

    He said, "Danny boy, this is a showdown."

    But Daniel was hot, he drew first and shot,

    And Rocky collapsed in the corner.

    Now, the doctor came in, stinking of gin,

    And proceeded to lie on the table.

    He said, "Rocky, you met your match,"

    And Rocky said, "Doc, it's only a scratch,

    And I'll be better, I'll be better, Doc, as soon as I am able"

    Now Rocky Raccoon, he fell back in his room,

    Only to find Gideon's Bible.

    Gideon checked out and he left it no doubt

    To help with good Rocky's revival.

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  • [+] 1 point 4 months ago (1 child)