"Oh, no. Facts!" Rod Joseph shrieked in horror.

I would imagine most giraffes, male or otherwise, mate with giraffes.

Lions, Giraffes, Bonobos and Tigers, oh my!

This is why they want to dismantle Wikipedia, by the way.

So what Joseph is basically doing is coming out of the closet saying “I’m straight as a giraffe.”

Kinda cute.

Giraffes, the gayest species.

Of course they’re necking.

The giraffes are keeping all of the gay to themselves so humans can’t have any

Literal 1984 shit. Taking one of the most extreme examples of hit happening and denying it completely. So sick of this shit.

Close. You have to make a bold claim that combines those 2 unrelated topics. Something like....."The fact that I have only seen gay giraffes exist while in captivity proves that being gay is unnatural. I'm 100% positive every giraffe outside of Zoos are banging the Lord's way."

You are absolutely right!

It’s only gay if the balls touch your chin.

Because he likes dick, I guarantee it.

"You aren't born liking dick. You choose to like dick, just like I'm choosing not to like dick. I don't like dick, I don't like dick, I don't like dick, I don't, I don't, I don't"

Why do you care if someone likes dick?

Because they do too but were told it's bad.

I wish I knew how to get people to care

So much of the anti-LGBTQ hysteria comes from people who are in immediate proximity to friends and loved ones coming out of the closet. And while the natural response to this occurrence is to show love and support, we have a deluge of misinformation that's designed to poison people into believing the most insane bullshit.

Which is to say, people do care. But they tend to get their heads scrambled with reactionary media. And the end result is that, after hearing for decades "if you're gay then you've become the victims of sexual assault and you're going to do drugs and you'll get horrible diseases that will kill you", they respond with abject horror at the slightest hint of queerness. Same if you see a sibling or a child or (god fucking forbid) a parent or spouse show signs of it.

The end result of this firehose of induced anxiety, combined with the economic pressures of poverty and the social pressures of fascist religious institutions, is incoherent panic.

Why do you care if someone likes dick?

Because then they'll make you like dick and liking dick will kill you and damn your soul in a lake of fire for eternity.

I'm guessing religion.

Leviticus 18:22:

Do not have sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman; that is detestable.

Leviticus 20:13:

If a man has sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They are to be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads.

Jude 1:7

In a similar way, Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding towns gave themselves up to sexual immorality and perversion. They serve as an example of those who suffer the punishment of eternal fire.

Referencing:

Genesis 19

Genesis 19:5–8

Before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of the city of Sodom—both young and old—surrounded the house.  They called to Lot, “Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we can have sex with them.”

Lot went outside to meet them and shut the door behind him  and said, “No, my friends. Don’t do this wicked thing.  Look, I have two daughters who have never slept with a man. Let me bring them out to you, and you can do what you like with them. But don’t do anything to these men, for they have come under the protection of my roof.”

And:

Genesis 19:12–13

The two men said to Lot, “Do you have anyone else here—sons-in-law, sons or daughters, or anyone else in the city who belongs to you? Get them out of here, because we are going to destroy this place. The outcry to the Lord against its people is so great that he has sent us to destroy it.”

And:

Genesis 19:24–25:

Then the Lord rained down burning sulfur on Sodom and Gomorrah—from the Lord out of the heavens.  Thus he overthrew those cities and the entire plain, destroying all those living in the cities—and also the vegetation in the land.

Romans 1:26–28

Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones.  In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.

Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done.

1 Corinthians 6:9–10

Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.

It's just like those homophobes that talk about how hard it is not to be gay. "Something something constant temptation to have sex with men" and all that. I can say with absolute certainty that I've never experienced that temptation. I think you might just be attracted to men my guy.

Even if it were true that people aren't queer by birth, that should make no difference to their rights.

I'd be willing to take a large bet that this guy has a Grindr profile.

You can't be born straight, either...

They are, yes.

This is like saying Liberace proves gay people are all actually straight.

https://slrpnk.net/post/40047735/23228566

There we go someone beat me to it lmao

Dolphins too.

I think he's saying that it's an acquired taste

survey

Computer, zoom in, decode, and enhance.

have sex with

Quite a lot of them are chiropractors, osteopaths and other para-medical "degree" holders. Not to mention the ones who have real medical degrees, but are certified by dodgy boards that they set up themselves, like Rand Paul.

another man male giraffe

Quickly closes browser tab

"It's... it's research!"

To be fair, giraffes are stupid sexy. 🦒

You mean get fucked by a giraffe. It's always the people who are religiously sexually repressed and in reality really, really crave the largest cock their assholes can take.

They still give me the horn.

I had a new prank idea just now, I need to get the notification sound and play it in public.

The white sand beaches are pretty nice, IMHO.

https://www.visitflorida.com/travel-ideas/articles/florida-white-orange-dark-sand-beaches/

Much of the sand on Florida beaches is made up of quartz crystals, produced by the weathering of continental land masses like the Appalachian mountains. The quartz is washed down America's great rivers into the Atlantic and the Gulf where it's carried onto the beaches by water currents and waves.

If you wind up leaving, enjoy its strengths now.

I'd approve of that. Everyone who wants to mess with personal relationships or push fear of new arrivals deserves as much.