Man, that's even more confused. So you can be heteronormatively horny, but only as long as you acknowledge the possibility of boning outside your comfort zone? If gender nonconforming sex happens in the hypothetical woods does anybody hear it?

Honestly, that'd be kinda funny if it wasn't such a depressing proxy for leftist purity tests and frequent inability to accept any intermediate states between utopian idealized outcomes and right wing dystopia.

Why would you be? You can be absolutely aware of the social patterns imposed on you, including those that are discriminatory or unfair, and still be subject to their effects.

Humans build a lot of their psyche by socializing. From aesthetic preference to sexual arousal or choices of flavor and texture for food. You're not a hypocrite for not liking spicy food growing up in a culture with milder tastes and you're not a hypocrite for finding traditional gendered aesthetics attractive after growing up in a culture that reinforced them at you at every turn.

You're a hypocrite if you find those distasteful or exploitative and still perpetuate them forward to your kids, but even if you don't, you're not the only influence they have.

See, that's why this is a bit of a bummer. This fiction on leftist circles that you can change a deeply ingrained societal pattern overnight or you're a failure or a hypocrite is not just unrealistic, it's kind of ignorant and mean spirited. You should be concerned with not making things worse and moving them in the right direction, but you shouldn't always take the maximalist approach and assume you're responsible for enforcing overnight radical change.

That's how right wingers keep setting up their dumb absurdity checks. They just dare progressives to go maximal on every stupid detail and then point at it and call it a lack of common sense. You can recognize a consequence of inequality without enforcing a complete solution instantly. Change takes time, even on an individual level.

You know, I was pretty assured on my line of reasoning here until I read "I wouldn't date black or Asian folks" and... eeeeh, maybe there's room for nuance here.

In my defense, I'll say it's the way of putting it that feels icky more than the sentiment. But still. Kinda ew. Don't know if this was a Socratic, reverse psychology thing, but if so, well played.