I was going to joke about "Milk is simply processed grass" but then you said
I practically live on cheese, but I could see arguments for dairy products not being vegan
Brother, cheese is not vegan. Are you confusing it with vegetarian? Vegan = no animal derived product. Eggs, milk, wool, etc. are not allowed.
That said "is honey vegan" is debated and there isn't really one consensus. Some vegans allow it, others don't. The main issue is that most honeys are not harvested in ethical ways & their apiaries are not set in a way to benefit the surrounding ecology.