The first time you try anything new, you are going to be shit at it. Why the obsession with what’s more likely than not going to be some awkward fumbling?

It’s just so weird that this is considered a pivotal event that somehow marks you. Changes something about you like a magic enchantment getting broken.

Not nitrous, but amyl nitrate. Only something I really partake in if a friend is offering. Doesn’t really give me anything I want “solo.”

4chan’s /b/ board has a thread pretty much daily for 20 years at this point, filled with pictures of black men with large penises and baiting text. (Obviously written by a white guy with a fetish, but pretending to be black with stuff like “jealous white boy?” etc. )

It’s gauche to be mentioning Emmett Till on a porn board, but you can’t divorce the obsession with black men fucking their wives/girlfriend from the fact that many black men were horrifically tortured and murdered on the accusation that someone fucked (or even whistled at) a white woman.

Another aspect is that cuckolding is more sexually transgressive than cuckqueening, in the same way that polygyny has always been more common than polyandry.

Porn is missing a lot of things that are necessary for good sex - how often are you seeing lube or condoms?

Beyond that - other than shallow plots, you get blow job, jack hammer vaginal, jack hammer anal. Moaning that is performative rather than out of genuine pleasure.

I think a lot of young men are mislead by porn and peers into thinking there are magical Techniques (tm) that make you a sex star, when the far more complicated reality is that you have to understand your partners body.

For example, most people enjoy receiving oral sex. You might assume that giving oral to your partner in foreplay is a good thing.However, I cannot fucking stand receiving oral and it absolutely ruins sex for me, especially when I have communicated ahead of time that I do not want it. I actually want jackhammer and blow because that ties into my own mappings of sexual pleasure. This is not what the vast majority of people want nor what culture tells us to want, but likely neither are your particular sexual desires. The best sex comes from when you connect with what they want too.

Good sex is about connecting with someone in a way such that your pleasure is tied up in making them feel pleasure but also knowing that your pleasure matters to them too. A complicated relationship ego death dance with the idea that your bodies are made to make each other cum, which is not the same as learning mechanical techniques like you would to master a claw game. This is not what porn can possibly depict or offer.

United States

I didn’t sleep with the guy, the push back on condoms is a no because it’s rape-y vibes to try to argue with my boundaries. I was just curious if he was full of shit as well as being pushy.

I test regularly. Last everything test was June, but I did HIV self check in July.

It’s about the risk profile. STD risk will never be zero, so I like to weigh the risk versus fun. Any specific guy who’s pushing back against condoms gets a “no” because pushy behavior = rapey behavior, but if the military tests monthly or something, that’s useful information.

More of a connoisseur. Grindr is a great place to get reference pics for art and I’d just appreciate a societal push for more effort in dick pic composition.

What I don’t understand is how anyone is capable of believing that a terribly lit picture of them tugging on their wiener over the toilet is sexually appealing.

Dicks are beautiful when they’re framed with respect. There’s so much variety in size, color, shape… Grindr is a good place to go if you want art references because you’ll see how crazy different guys dicks are from each other. But so few men spend more than 5 seconds thinking about how to properly display their assets.

Once upon a time, I had an argument with a woman who was convinced that any transgender man servicing a glory hole in a men’s restroom was a rapist.

Just messaging guys on Grindr. They weren’t all in the room at once, it was a revolving door situation.

I’ve had trains run on me before, one right after another, but never a proper gang bang. A few threesomes - having guys take turns or spit roast, but only two dudes at once.