cross-posted from: https://lemmy.dbzer0.com/post/70311378

Stealth

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[–] 67 points 5 months ago (7 children)

You’d be surprised how quiet a cow can be when it wants to. Once when I was collecting a water sample in a pond I saw there were cows a fair distance across the field, and in the minute or so of stopping and squatting it took me to find a way to get the sample without getting covered in mud, a group of fully grown cows had silently crept up to within about 10 feet of me to stare at me like 🫪 As soon as I stood up I was a person again and they lost interest in me. Definitely raised my heart rate a bit!

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  • [–] 21 points 5 months ago (4 children)

    I love this story. Do you have any other interesting cow anecdotes or surprising cow facts you'd be willing to share? I'm a cow fan, but I don't have much direct experience with them.

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  • [–] 29 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    They’ll keep wanting to play when they’re under a year old even when they weigh 500+ pounds, which can be a little intimidating! They’re super curious even as adults, if you leave a large exercise ball in their enclosure they’ll chase it around and headbutt it. They also have incredibly rough tongues, like a cat’s tongue times 10.

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  • [–] 37 points 5 months ago (9 children)

    Statistically, cows pose a much greater threat to Americans than bears and sharks combined. Cattle reportedly kill roughly 20 people each year in the United States, while fatal bear and shark attacks average about two per year for each species.

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  • [–] 33 points 5 months ago (6 children)

    I've been chased twice by cows here in Germany, not a single time by a bear or a shark.

    Coincidence? I don't think so!

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  • [–] 3 points 5 months ago (5 children)

    Sounds like what the bear/shark-maffia wants you to believe!

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  • [–] 3 points 5 months ago (4 children)

    I'm not paid to lure people into the woods or sea! Who said that?

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  • [–] 19 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    How else are they supposed to kill all those sharks?

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  • [–] 11 points 5 months ago

    Tauren rogue sneaks THROUGH the walls.

    Tauren rogue has the smaller tail on its back.

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  • [–] 5 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    Do not let cows be predators. That's how you get the mad cow disease. Which means that these bells are medicinal.

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  • [–] [S] 5 points 5 months ago

    That's how you get the mad cow disease.

    No. You get that by feeding them the ground up bones and brains of other cows that have been fed the ground up bones and brains of yet other cows.

    What you get by letting cows be predators is a three movie deal with a possibility for a larger franchise.

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  • [–] 3 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    Cows are not stupid, grass is very tasty :3

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  • [–] 3 points 5 months ago
    [–] 1 point 5 months ago

    Sneak. Crouch. Pounce. Kill!

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  • [–] 2 points 4 months ago

    https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/montreal/fugitive-cows-in-quebec-escape-capture-again-and-again-1.6662107

    Herd of cows evading authorities for months in 2022. Its now bien Turner into a musical apparently.

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  • 15 comments in c/microblogmemes@lemmy.world view that post
    [–] 27 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (5 children)

    OP clearly wasn't there for the beforetimes, when cities were razed by bovines from hell wielding polearms.

    Edit: for those out of the loopDiablo 2 had a secret cow level you could unlock after completing the fifth act.

    It was a joke level the developers added in response to rumors about a secret cow level in the first game.

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  • [–] 5 points 5 months ago (3 children)
  • [–] 6 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    I assume it's a reference to the game West of Loathing, where in the past "the cows came home". The cows were demonic bovine monsters that razed huge chunks of the land.

    Or I just play weird games and I'm missing the actual reference. 🤷‍♂️

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  • [–] 27 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    Actually, the bell is because their horns don’t work.

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  • [–] 22 points 5 months ago (3 children)

    The bell keeps them from killing sharks. Sharks are endangered

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  • [–] 5 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    Piece is a paid cow account.

    There are 20-30 people killed by cows in the US alone every year.

    Globally only 5-6 people die every year from shark attacks.

    Those cows are trying to get you to let them stealthily engage in mass murder. Keep the bells on!

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  • [–] 5 points 5 months ago

    I don't support moo-rder

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